Page 219 of If Our Hearts Collide

“No, no, no! Sweet girls don’t get railed and defiled.”

“That’s what you want from this arrangement?”

I think about it for a moment. “Umm, not exactly. It’s just that…when I say I’m inexperienced, Ireallymean it. I am not a”—my words come out as a stutter—“virgin. But I basically am since I made the guy stop as soon as he put it inside. It was my one and only time during my college days, and I basically go through life trying to forget it ever happened. It was that horrible. But I now use toys. The ones that I can penetrate my?—”

“What made it so bad for you?” he blurts out.

I thought I was tense; Collins’s spine looks like a steel flagpole.

I make a face. “It hurt. And not in the good way that porn videos try to portray.” Finally, I’m spared a glance—barely. I let out a sigh. “There was nothing sexy about it. He didn’t get me ready. It felt like he was slicing me up like deli meat. I felt unpleasantly sore afterward. And then I really didn’t want to do it again, so I didn’t. Flash forward a few years, and I’m horny as fuck.”

“That’s the difference between fucking a boy and fucking a man. A man will know when you are ready versus when you aren’t. Trust me to know, Penny.”

I nod, allowing his words to settle. “Yeah… I wasn’t ready mentally either, and I sure as hell wasn’t ready physically. But I’m ready now. Or just plain ol’ horny and deprived.”

“That’s not a good combo.”

“You’re telling me. It’s the worst. Try living with it.”

Collins runs a hand down the back of his neck, looking visibly agitated. I’m messing this all up. It feels like I’m killing the mood and then beating it again with my embarrassing past.

“You’re mad.”

His hands white-knuckle grip the steering wheel so tightly that I worry he’ll rip it from its post. “I’m not mad.”

“Frustrated, then?”

Collins sighs. His back is rigid, as his eyes stay focused forward on the road. He’s obviously feeling some type of emotion, despite his lips staying sealed in a stern line. “No.”

I toss my hands into the air, bumping them against the ceiling. “Well, it would be helpful to know what you’re thinking, as my mind races with every negative thought I can possibly conjure up. And trust me, your silence is only adding fuel to the flame of self-doubt that burns through me. I know I’m going to disappoint you. That much is obvious.”

It’s so quiet inside the car that I can hear the straining beats of my own blood pumping through my heart. Collins pulls into the parking garage at our complex, cuts the engine, and is walking toward my door before I even have a chance to undo my seatbelt.

With calculated efficiency, Collins opens the door, unhooks my belt, and pulls me out of the car so fast that I don’t even have a chance to overthink what is happening.

I start to break the silence with another bout of word vomit, and his lips are on mine, sucking the words from my throat before they ever get a chance to hit our ears. My back presses against the cool metal and glass of the passenger side door, as hishands dig into the fleshy part of my ass cheeks. I gasp for air in between him kissing my neck and then traveling back to my lips. It’s a full-on assault—in the best possible way—as he reverently worships me with his physical touch, letting me know that my body is desirable to him.

Pulling away, he catches his breath. “Is this clear enough to you how deep my attraction is?”

“I need another reminder.” I start to giggle when he growls, and then quickly shut my mouth.

His fingers move to my sides, and he starts to tickle me.

“Stop, please”—I inhale and exhale, frantically trying to catch my breath—“I’ll pass out.”

When I break free, I make a dash for the elevator, laughing as I hear Collins’s cursing behind me as he races to catch up.

I knew it was a mistake to try to escape him from the first two paces, but I’m too invested now to stop.

So I run and run, as my lungs burn from the exertion.

There’s something very feral about having Collins Stone hunt me down. And I know without a doubt that I’ll be caught, and I will be punished.

Because the man can run…

Damn. He really can run.

I make it three more paces before arms bind around me. Like I’m a sack of potatoes, Collins picks me up and hauls me over his strong shoulders.