Page 88 of Implode

I cough a little as the ginger ale tickles my throat. “Thank you.”

“Angie’s right. You can wear any color and always look amazing.”

“You are full of compliments today,” I say with a smirk.

“Just being honest.”

“Too bad you weren’t honest with me about the trackers.” I’m not as angry as I was the night Nic showed up at my apartment with a peace offering of food. However, I’m still rather sulky. It’s pointless to imagine going through life with that level of surveillance because everything that I thought of prebaby will never be part of my vision for the future.

The baby changes everything.

“Too bad you weren’t honest with me over the—” His eyes drift to my belly.

I swallow hard. He’s right. But so am I. I settle into my seat and continue to sip my ginger ale. The only thing missing is the lemon slices I’ve learned to love; now I don’t want to drink it any other way.

It is an easy ride out of the city and to the smaller town of Hillsboro, where Donna and Germain Hoffman reside. I haven’t been to their house since Christmas, when Ethan was too busy to spend the holiday with me. In fact, he never wanted to spend any special occasions together. How I kept him around for as long as I did is a true indication of my own lack of self-worth. Pretty sure there was a red flag the size of Oregon waving to let me know that he wasn’tthe one. And I still pushed my gut feeling away.

When we arrive at the house, Donna is waiting in the driveway in her slippers, looking to bum rush the limo in excitement. Penny joins her, probably coming out to see what the high-pitched screams are all about. I know I would be curious at what type of creature could make such a sound.

I’m waiting for the day that the Hoffman brothers react to a scene like their mother does. She definitely has enough excitement bubbling inside her for everyone.

We all embrace, and it isn’t until I step away from the group that I notice Germain approaching with a huge smile on his face.

“It’s so good to see you again, Claire,” he greets. He skips my extended hand and envelops me in a hug. I didn’t realize how much I needed one until we let go.

“Thank you for having me.”

He pulls back to study my face. “You are always welcome here. Any time,” he says with a gentleness to his tone. If he knows something, it’s only because of my paranoia, and not because he gives any indication.

Tears well up in my eyes, but luckily I can keep them hidden until I collect my thoughts. Nic’s parents sure know how to express their love and appreciation—through both words and their actions. I’m not used to it, so being receptive to their affection takes a bit of work on my part. I wonder how I would have turned out if my parents loved me with an ounce of what the Hoffman parents love their children. It’s impossible for me not to compare.

Despite calling the Hoffman boys barbarians on more than one occasion, I can see where they get their gentle-giant vibe, just by looking at Germain’s eyes. He is calm and collected, yet staid and proud. As he should be—he has raised a wonderful family.

Penny approaches me after Germain lets me go. “So glad you are here to help balance out my mom,” she whispers.

Penny is in loose-fitting, nondescript clothes. However, her angelic face, with her broody expression, hints at her story. Penny has been through some things, and while I know some of the story from Angie, I also know that there is more that neither of them are sharing.

“Oh yeah?” I ask, unsure what she means.

“Yup, she basically has been running around here all morning making sure she has everything perfect. And for some reason you calm her down.”

“What? Me?” I cannot possibly have heard her correctly. I usually have the opposite of a calming effect. Hell, Nic pretty much tells me I drive him insane on the daily.

“Yeah, she holds your opinion up on a pedestal, so if you find approval in what she did inside, then she will relax the rest of the evening knowing that she accomplished the vision you tried to get across for Angie.”

“Oh,” I say, more to myself than to Penny. “I didn’t realize she cared about what I thought, at least not to this magnitude.”

Penny grabs my elbows and gives me a shake. “Um, yeah, she totally does. You are so creative with your style, and Angie has been talking so much about your endeavors with Plus None and all you have contributed thus far. Anyway, I digress. What I’m trying to say is, my mom values your opinion.”

I smile back at Penny who is a bundle of nervous energy. While still rocking the more laid-back tomboyish look, she is always so elegant and thoughtful in her clothing choices. In fact, her aura is giving me an idea for another lifestyle box idea to bring up to Angie after the wedding. We can totally create a subscription box that caters to those who want that understated, confident look.

That is what Penny represents to me, or at least what she should. The girl is gorgeous with flawless skin and the most enchanting blue eyes. She appears shy, but I can see her coming out of her shell when given a safe opportunity. I’m not sure how the old Penny acted, but I’m hoping with time, she will learn how to fly again.

Already, Penny is a different person than when I met her for the first time over Christmas break. I know she has been through a lot, and getting back to normal is sometimes a struggle.

And then it dawns on me. I have been through hell too, and look at how I am still standing. We women are all warriors. I am definitely not the same person I was when I still lived in Virginia, and I am not even the same woman I was a couple of weeks ago. Life changes a person and helps mold us into hopefully better versions of ourselves. I don’t want to regress. I don’t want my past to be a roadblock for a better future.

“Come inside, everyone,” Donna announces, linking arms with both me and Angie. She ushers us through the foyer and into the main living area, where she has decorated the entire room in white flowers. Huge glass lanterns rest on end tables and shelves, casting a warm glow. A pianist sits in the corner, playing instrumental love songs for us to enjoy. “I know this is just the night before the rehearsal, but I wanted it to be elegant and special, nonetheless. Even if we just order in some grub and play some rounds of family games.”

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