I finish up my fight fest, clean up my supplies, and shower. As the water sprays down on me, I think about how different my life would have evolved if I wasn’t privy to information gathering techniques. Where would I be right now, in this very moment in time? It is in the quiet that I allow my mind to drift to every what-if scenario. Many people perceive me to be laid-back in comparison to Graham. It is only because I internalize everything and am less quick to reveal my cards.
I cut off the water and towel dry myself off. I have exhausted myself so that my body’s only option is to sleep.
* * *
I wake with an erection so hard and the image of a vanilla cupcake fairy dancing around in my head. What the actual fuck? What is this girl doing to me? I have had plenty of conquests, but no one has had me so utterly twisted like this poisonous princess. She has the power to destroy me if I can’t even filter out my subconscious thoughts from being infiltrated with her beauty.
I close my eyes and tug hard at my dick, thinking of all the nasty things I want to do to her. With her. It takes me seconds to come. And even less time to feel the pangs of guilt for going against Graham’s wishes to keep Angie’s best friend safe.
She isn’t safe. Not from me, at least. My mind is laser focused on her and there’s not much I can do to stop the spiral.
As much as I know she can destroy me, I know I can have the same effect on her. Everyone I choose to touch gets tainted by my singular needs. Is it worth damaging the relationship with my soon-to-be sister-in-law just to satisfy my dick temporarily?
I never said I wasn’t a selfish bastard.
I saunter into the bathroom to clean up my sticky mess. I decide to take the day off—something I haven’t done in months. I throw on a pair of athletic shorts and a sleeveless T-shirt. Socks and my running shoes complete my attire.
I take the stairs down, exit through the back door of the lobby, and work my way toward the river. Portland is very peaceful in the morning. Dew is still fresh on the budding flowers. Birds chirp, cutting through the silence of the city.
I jog past the Entice office and recall the day Claire entered my doors for the first time. When she told Graham basically where to stick his ego, I should have known then that the girl was special. No one does that to Graham and gets away with it. She was such a little firecracker. Still is, although something seems to have dulled her sparkle. I’m sure dating an asshole doesn’t help. I am waiting for my sources to tell me he is an even bigger one than I originally thought. My instincts rarely let me down.
I didn’t think much of Claire then. To be fair, I didn’t think much of anything other than bringing down the drug ring. However, once she showed up with Angie and Graham for Christmas in Hillsboro, I got to see another side to her that went beyond her wild costume ideas, her horrible spy disguises, and her quick-witted personality. Instead, I got to see how vulnerable she was.
I could read between the lines and see the glimmer of sadness in her eyes when she looked at the love Graham and Angie share. It wasn’t a greedy type of jealousy for her best friend, but I could tell that it is what she wished she had with Ethan. Her boyfriend is one hell of an idiot to leave his girl alone on one of the biggest celebrated holidays of the year. Then she handed me a gift.Me. Granted, it was a gag gift—a unicorn selfie stick—but still. I didn’t see it coming; we barely know each other. I mean, I know a ton about her, but that is only because I have double standards when it comes to breaking the law. Most of the time I have someone else gather the data, so I feel less like a stalker and more like someone who is just curious.
I ask myself all the time, what’s the point? It’s not like I plan to do anything more than destroy. I sure as hell don’t want anything even resembling monogamy or a commitment.
I run the waterfront path, feeling the morning air whip around my body as I glide along the pavement. I pass by the area where yoga took place last night. It was definitely a last-minute decision to attend the class. I tell myself that I was just making sure Claire was safe, being as it was dark out. The particular stretch near the water where she hosts her classes has been known to have an increase of petty crime after hours.
I glance at my watch that keeps track of my pace. It feels good to be disciplined in my workout routine and goals. I cut through the park and take the footbridge over the creek, heading back toward my building.
Part of the reason I chose this building is because of the security features and my ability to donate funds to customize the options. Working in the industry, I know how easy it is to get access where access is not authorized. Hence, why I love the double door feature in the lobby, plus the twenty-four-hour camera recording capabilities.
I’m not expecting any backlash from my FBI days, but I still take every precaution necessary to protect myself and those I love.
Once I’m inside my home, I shower, shave, eat brunch, and start packing my luggage. I have all intentions of letting Claire dictate what we do while in Vegas, so I need to make sure I am prepared for a variety of activities. I’m pretty sure she has gone as far as planning bathroom breaks in her crazy itinerary. How am I supposed to even go against her when she put her whole heart and soul into the planning? I’m an asshole, yes, but I do know my boundaries of how hard to push.
Reclining on the bed, I pull up my email that has the resort confirmation and the flight information. We need to get to the airport at two, if we want to get through security and make the five o’clock boarding time. I paid the extra fee to get priority seats and to be able to jump line. It’s these minor luxuries that will make flying commercial more bearable. Graham will do anything to make Angie happy, even if that means resisting the dumping of money into a private flight.
Before closing out of my email account, I see a new one pop up onto the top of the list from Collins. I open it and see the row of attachments at the bottom, along with a short message.
As expected, Collins came through on the request. He has retrieved bank statements, credit card information, hotel receipts, and household bill copies. However, the most important thing he has acquired for me is security camera footage and real-time photographs with timestamps. Damn, Ethan Maxwell has been busy. I bet Claire has zero clue what her loving boyfriend has been hiding. What a douchebag.
I close my eyes for a few minutes as I think about the approach I need to take with the newly discovered information. Claire is way too good for that man. However, it really is not my place to get involved. It’s one thing watching out for her from a safety aspect, but it’s a whole other ballgame inserting myself into a situation that is already jacked up.
I open up my text app and find Graham’s name.
Nic: I will meet you guys at the airport drop-off location around 2 PM.
He sends back a thumbs-up icon, letting me know we are both on the same page.
I’ve been to Vegas at least half a dozen times, but this trip seems so different from all of the others. For the first time in years, I am excited about something other than work.
I go back into my email and open the numerous messages Claire has sent over the past month. She is a bundle of energy squeezed into a petite body. She would send me her top twenty excursions list. Then she would second-guess herself and send me a newly revised list two hours later. A day after that, a narrowed down top ten list, followed by an addendum or two. Let’s not forget her thought-out reasoning for such revisions. This went on for an entire week. Somehow in the end, she wanted me to vote on her top five favorite top ten lists. Like, what the actual fuck? Who has time to do any of this?
The best part is, I would respond to the last of a dozen email messages with a thumbs-up, but never really give her a solid answer. It was too tempting to resist and prevent myself from getting another five separate responses in return. I was having too much fun trying to fluster her.
Just reading through her email lists was exhausting. I imagined what she was doing at the time of her research. Was she snacking on veggie sticks and playing with her hair? Perhaps she was in an oversized T-shirt drinking a margarita?