Page 152 of Taste of Addiction

His smile is friendly. Platonic. So much is said with just the lopsided curl of his lips.

“Here, these are for you ladies,” Zander says, revealing two bouquets of roses from a bag I didn’t even notice he was carrying.

“Congrats on graduating, you two,” Blake says, giving me a hug and then Claire.

I bite my bottom lip to keep my tears at bay. “You guys are graduating too,” I comment. Everyone has a master’s degree but me. I am lucky I even have a degree at all—even if it is not exactly what I set out to accomplish.

“Thought we could all say goodbye to this place together,” Blake says. “I brought a few of my friends.”

“Please tell me one is Jose!” Claire chants.

“You’re in luck,” he says, pulling out the bottle of tequila, followed by all the mixers.

We make a circle on the floor in the living room that is stripped of its furniture. It feels so empty here. Some other people will move in, most likely in a month, and make their own memories.

Blake serves up the margaritas into plastic cups, passing us each one. Zander busts out his guitar from his case and we all join in singing, “Memories Don’t Die.”

When the last box is loaded into the car trunk, Claire and I linger on the steps in an embrace.

“I’m going to miss this place,” she says tearily.

“I sure am too.”

* * *

“Claire. Please tell me what’s wrong. You can tell me anything. What’s on your mind?”

We are sitting in Ethan’s apartment while he is at work, day drinking and celebrating our entry into adulthood. For someone who is a businessman, I am a bit surprised over his meager residence. His style seems polished but minimalistic. Maybe Deena cleaned him out during the divorce, and if that’s the case, I hope he has some funds to give Claire the life she deserves—assuming they try to make it work no matter where she ends up living.

Claire and I have a bit more free time on our hands as of late and are taking advantage of getting together more often. Her gym hours have been cut to make up for the limited attendance due to the winter holidays. I resigned completely from my job at the smoothie cafe. Between the limited hours and the paparazzi lingering on the street to harass me, I just could not justify the hassle for a minimum wage salary. Plus, the smile bursting from Graham’s face over the news was enough to make it all worth it.

But that still leaves me without a big plan for the future. While to Graham it would be acceptable for me to lie around and spend his money, I need to contribute to society in some aspect to feel content. I may not have all the answers now, but I will eventually figure it all out.

I refill my glass from the communal wine bottle. We are sprawled out on pillows in the center of Ethan’s living room, tossing organic cheese puffs into each other’s mouth. They taste considerably worse than the non-organic processed cheese ones, but I would never break Claire’s heart with my menial analysis.

She clears her throat, rolls her shoulders back, and announces, “I’m running out of time.”

“Can you be less vague?”

“The internship. I still haven’t decided.”

“What? Why?” Ever since I saw the accidental mail stating that Claire applied to the LA facility, I just assumed if she got accepted, she would go. Now I’m not so sure. Not many people get these types of once-in-a-lifetime opportunities. It never occurred to me that she would put her dreams on hold like this. And for what?

Or who?

“I just feel like my head is one big puff of smoke and no matter how hard I squint, I can’t see what is ahead of me.”

My lips press into a hard line. “No one can see into the future, Claire. Just trust your gut with your decision. That’s all you can really do.”

“Have you gotten official word from the university regarding your degree?”

“They are having a team of reviewers look over my work from my previous semester and this one. I had to resubmit several assignments, answer dozens of questions, and now it’s just a waiting game to see if my degree will change. But it doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it matters.”

I shrug. “Not really. I missed the deadlines on securing an internship. Plus, when I had another failed project and no endorsement from the deciding professor at the time, I was overlooked for all of the good positions—that are now filled. I am at the bottom of the list, and everything available now would just be scraps.”

“So, what are you going to do?”