Page 125 of Rush of Jealousy

“Lovely,” I deadpan.

“It’s a weird game we play. Gets him to really ravish me though. So, I keep upping my game and hoping for the best.”

“Sounds like you are throwing mud at the wall and seeing what sticks,” I comment absently.

“Yup. Pretty much.”

I wish I could say I didn’t play a similar game with Graham. But I would be lying. I love it when I get him to lose control. It is one of my top three favorite hobbies.

I glance at the clock and realize I am running out of time. I run back upstairs to pack my bag and throw on a fresh set of clothes. I braid my hair down the side. I dust on a little blush, add some mascara, and apply peach-flavored lip gloss. I throw my schoolbooks and laptop into my tote bag and toss my Altoids container of pills inside the secret zipper compartment—just in case.

I can hear the arrival of Ethan down below and decide that I need to get out of here fast. I jog down the steps, slip on shoes, and decide to wait outside in the fresh air for Graham to arrive. I park my butt on the top step and rest my elbows on my knees.

In a little over a week, it will be Thanksgiving, and I will meet his family for the first time. I am not sure if I am more excited or more nervous about this milestone.

Thoughts of Zander infiltrate my mind, and I cannot shake how his words affected me. Maybe I am making a mistake by dating Graham. Maybe my heart will be broken in the end. And maybe Zander won’t be around to catch me when I fall. The more I think about him holding out on pursuing any real relationships with other women, because he was waiting for me, the guiltier I feel. It is like being friends with him has blocked him from possibly finding happiness with someone else. And even though it was not my intention, I still feel responsible.

I love being friends with Zander. He is so easygoing, and I can chat about almost anything with him without judgment. Maybe I used him? Maybe the selfish side of my subconscious wanted to keep him all to myself and not share him with others. Because if there was a girlfriend involved, then I would slide into the “other woman” category. No woman really wants to be labeled as the “other” anything.

I am so deep in thought sitting on the top step that I don’t even notice Graham taking the flight up to me.

“Why are you waiting outside in the cold?” he asks, pulling me up and wrapping his arms around me.

He is dressed in full business attire—suit and all—and smells sexy.

“I’m pretty sure Claire and Ethan have big plans tonight. I don’t need any more images for my database. Some things cannot be erased. My poor, innocent eyes.”

He laughs and guides me to his car. “Pretty sure you only play the innocent act. We both know the truth when you get into bed.” He leans down and licks my ear. “You know what they say about a lady in the street…”

I fake scoff as he helps me into the passenger seat. “Only because you’ve corrupted me with your prowess.”

He jogs to his side, settles into his seat, and pulls out of the parking spot. “Hey, a man can’t help himself when a beautiful woman dangles her virtue in front of him for the taking.”

I turn in my seat and glare at him. “Oh really, Graham? Is that how it happened? You’re blaming me for tempting you?”

“Yes.”

I smack his arm, and he bursts out laughing. “You are such a troll!”

“There you go with the name calling,” he says with a playful smirk. “What do you want for dinner? Any requests?”

“Frozen pizza.”

He turns to look at me, and I can tell he doesn’t know if I am serious or not. “Like the kind from the grocery store?”

“Yeah. Have you ever been?”

He shakes his head at me and chuckles. “What am I going to do with you?”

I smile sweetly. “Hopefully take me to the nearest grocery store for some pizza.”

“But there are four amazing Italian restaurants within a three-mile radius of our place.”

“That is wonderful information. But I want something less, umm—” I snap my fingers, trying to think.

“Delicious?” he says with a look of disgust.

“Handsy.”

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