Page 28 of Defiant Devotion

Prenatal vitamins would have to wait. Whole meals would be coming eventually. Milk. Water. A balanced diet intended to foster a healthy infant. Those were the things that I needed right now. But they’d have to wait.

On the evening of another long, restless day, I suffered through a nagging tension headache and sluggishly paced through the room. Back and forth, I walked and aggravated my sore ankle. Moving was better than sitting, though. Staying upright helped with this nausea that I hoped was a sign of morning sickness—or rather, all-day-and-night sickness. If I was coming down with something, I wouldn’t be able to find help.

It seemed so stupid to be in the city but not go home, yet I now knew I had to do this carefully. I had to be deliberate about my return because it seemed I was clueless about whom to trust.

Why would Eva be near that Petrov woman?She wouldn’t willingly associate with the enemy, so I had to go with the assumption that she had been taken, or manipulated… or something.

How did that other woman recognize me?I’d been absent for eleven years. I had no idea who she was, and if she’d remembered me from before, I looked different now.

Rubbing my stomach as hunger pangs made me dizzy, I sighed.Iamdifferent now.I was an expectant mother, wrought with panic, paranoia, and trauma.

I couldn’t walk up to the Baranov house when no one would be there, and that was my biggest fear. If Eva was near that Petrov, maybe she had been moved elsewhere. My mother and father were gone. My uncle, too. For all I knew, the mansion I’d once called home could be vacant now or taken by rival families.

“Those bastards,” I growled as I rubbed my face. “Those fucking Ilyin bastards.” They’d deprived me of any news, any information, and I felt too nervous to reenter society being this ignorant and clueless. How could I know whom to trust or where to go now?

I’d trusted my body with Ben, but in hindsight, I felt so stupid to have wasted time on having sex with him again. It had happened so suddenly, but that was no excuse. Now wasn’t the time to let my desires rule me.

Still, as I left my room, I analyzed how that manhadmade me feel so good and comforted. While I was sheltered in captivity for too long, I doubted that the phenomenon that pulled me to him could be normal. I was a level-headed, survivalist kind of woman. Not a needy, clingy idiot.

Then again…I rolled my eyes at the possibility of my hormones wreaking havoc on me.

Okay. Fine. But that’s still no excuse.

I refused to waste any more time on sex or even thinking about the sexy man who was fond of playing games with me. He’d recognized me but acted like he didn’t, and that was too fishy,too suspicious for me to want to trust him at all, should I see him again.

Needing answers, I headed to a nearby diner that used to be owned by the Petrov family. The crappy hotel I was staying at was more or less on neutral ground. If anyone claimed that neighborhood, it’d be a gang or someone else, not Mafia. Then again, I doubted turf lines had remained exactly the same as what I remembered eleven years ago.

Regardless, I recognized this part of the city. With a hoodie as a way to hide my face, I hoped that entering this specific diner would bring me closer to a member of the Petrov family—another from a Mafia organization. I had to eavesdrop and listen in to get an idea of what had been happening lately. If my memory served me well, men liked to talk at bars, diners, and cafés like this, where they could relax and shoot the shit.

I wasn’t disappointed. Up at the counter, a few Petrov soldiers were eating a late meal, talking and laughing freely. They sat up on the stools, carrying on without a care, and I slid onto the booth seat near them while I busied myself with a single cup of coffee. It was all I could afford at this rate, and it would give me a prop to be here for the sake of listening in.

“If I see one of those fucking idiots again, I’ll kill them,” one man boasted.

I almost rolled my eyes.Yeah, yeah, Yeah, yeah.It didn’t matter that I’d been gone for eleven years. Some things simply never changed. These soldiers were riled up and annoyed. The threats of killing others didn’t faze me. But I was disappointed that they were talking about another organization outside the Mafia circle. I wanted to know about my family, about what remained of the Baranovs so I could return to them and provide for my baby.

“I see you.”

I didn’t flinch as the young feminine voice reached my ears. Not looking away from my coffee as I idly stirred my spoon in the liquid, I tried to puzzle out who’d spoken.

“I said I can see you,” she repeated, haughtier.

Now that I was paying attention for someone to speak up, I tracked her location. Next to me, on the other side of a partition, was a young teenager. I slowly glanced at her, careful not to let any expressions show on my face.

“I see you listening in.” The girl who didn’t look mature enough to be considered an adolescent smirked at me. “You’re spying on them.” A tip of her chin toward the counter was all the indication she wanted to show me.

“Excuse me?” I asked, feigning confusion and innocence.

“You’ve been sitting here spying and listening to what those men say. I’m gonna tell my daddy that you’re spying.”

I licked my lips, peeved that this scrap of a spoiled child could try to threaten me. After all I’d gone through? After all I’d survived, I had to contend with her acting like this?

“You shouldn’t be so cruel,” I advised, keeping the heat out of my tone the best that I could. Even though she was young, she could quickly gather attention and cause trouble for me. She could stand up and tell others a stranger was spying here, and I’d be stuck.

She smiled devilishly at me.

“Women need each other’s help in this world,” I said, thinking back to Jenny’s compassion and selflessness. What a contrast she was to this punk.

The girl huffed. “In my world, I don’t need help. I’m a princess.”

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