Page 9 of Worth the Chase

It was right around the time I’d moved back to Sugar Mountain. I’d given in to some tourist I’d met one afternoon at the diner. She knew exactly who I was, and it inflated my ego when I really fucking needed it. I’d been feeling so down, so shitty about retiring, that any attention felt like good attention.

Even if it only lasted for an hour.

The second it’d ended and she was on her way, I’d felt like shit again.

There hadn’t been a moment while I played professional hockey that I didn’t sleep around. It came with the territory. Plus, I was young and single, so no harm, no foul, right? Gorgeous women waited in the bar of the team’s hotel each night when we were on the road. I’d walk into the dimly lit space and literally take my pick. It was that easy.

But that was all it ever was. Easy. Superficial. No strings attached. Barely more than a fuck. Even when the woman pushed for more, my answer was always the same—I don’t have time for a relationship. I’d tell them I’d see them the next time I was in town, and sometimes, I did. Most of the time, I didn’t.

Honestly, I wasn’t looking for anything more than sex. And for a guy who hated being alone, I had no idea why I wasn’t. It seemed like a girlfriend was exactly what I needed. Someone to come home to, to talk to each night, but for whatever reason, I refused to get attached. The answers as to why that was lay somewhere inside my fucked-up head, but I was too scared to confront them. So, I avoided them at all costs.

I could make all the excuses I’d wanted while I was on the road, playing hockey, but being back in Sugar Mountain, I was forced to face all the things I’d been trying to escape. Hence, why I’d been drinking too much.

Which truly made no sense.

Because the worst part about drinking was that it made me feel even lonelier. None of my sadness disappeared. It was always amplified.

“Hello? Earth to Matthew.” Someone’s voice broke through my inner thoughts.

I shook my head and found myself looking down at both Thomas and Patrick. Yeah, I was taller than both of them. It was only by two inches, but still, taller was taller.

“What?” I snapped.

“I asked if you needed a ride home,” Patrick said.

“Yeah, probably shouldn’t drive. Thanks,” I admitted. I had no business driving after drinking the way I had been. Even if I felt fine, I knew I technically wasn’t.

“Let’s go then. Brother, Brooklyn, Clara, Dad, we’re off.” Patrick said his goodbyes to the rest of our family, and I did the same, each one of us hugging before separating.

“It was the perfect wedding,” I said with a grin, meaning the words.

“It was, wasn’t it?” Brooklyn looked up at her husband with the sweetest gaze before squeezing little Clara’s arm gently.

“I had so much fun,” Clara said around a yawn.

“Me too,” I agreed before waving and following behind Patrick and Addison, who were already halfway out of the barn.

I glanced over my shoulder to get one last look at Bells, but her back was toward me, and she wasn’t paying me any attention at all.

Patrick and Addi stopped in front of my condo. It was a really nice place, but the majority of the owners didn’t live here, and they were rented out constantly during the tourist seasons. This was a good and bad thing. Good because most of SugarMountain couldn’t be all up in my business if they couldn’t see me. Bad because the majority of tourists ended up recognizing me and it made things awkward at times when they asked for autographs, pictures, and other things.

“When are you going to buy a house and get some privacy?” Patrick asked as I was reaching for the door handle on his shitty truck.

Everyone had an opinion on my choice of living conditions. My brothers all wanted me to buy a house or some land, and I understood, but wasn’t ready. The condo was plenty big for me, and a giant home would only remind me of how alone I truly was. Just because Patrick had been fine with living in his dream home without his dream woman didn’t mean I would be. How could I get a house when I wasn’t sure who I’d be sharing it with?

“When are you going to buy a truck from this century?” I shot back.

“They’re not really the same thing.” He shook his head.

“Bye,” I said as I exited his truck.

I headed up the stairs toward my place. That was when I noticed the busty blonde sitting at the top, and I realized Patrick had seen her as well, hence his mention of privacy.

She pushed herself up quickly and fluffed her hair. “Hi.”

“Hello.” I tried to walk past her, but she maneuvered herself in front of me.

“I was hoping you’d come back alone.” She grinned.

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