Page 56 of Stealing the Biker

Hide my emotions.

How can I hide this from Kiesha?

She’s going to hate me.

Though I hate myself enough for both of us.

How did I let it get this far?

Now I’m stuck. If I end things now, I’ll look like a coward who isn’t responsible.

“You sure you’re ready for this?”

“What do you mean? Are you asking me to terminate the pregnancy?”

“No.” I shake my head.

“I thought you’d be happy.” Her soulful green eyes glitter with unshed tears.

“I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”

“Talk to me.”

The last thing I want to do is talk. I’ll say something that will only hurt her. Instead, I press my lips to hers, trying to pretend that I’m good. That we’re great.

“I love you so much, Jimmy.” She kisses me deeper, and I try to return it but find myself unable to make the effort.

“What’s wrong with you? Are you upset?”

“I just worry that this will be more than we’re ready for.”

“You don’t need to worry so much. We’ll be fine. You’ll make a great dad. I just know it.” She kisses my cheek. “I really need to be with you. To feel close to you. We’ve been so out of sync since we moved in with Smoke and Ember. This is a good thing.”

I nod and force myself to go through the motions she expects. I wrap my arms around her and press my lips to the top of her head. “You’re right. This will bring us closer.” And tear me away from the woman I really love.

“I’m going to make you so happy, Jimmy.”

“I know you will,” I murmur against her lips.

We get ready for bed and as I lay next to her, all I can think about is Kiesha. Just because Sabrina is pregnant doesn’tmean we have to be together. But what’s the point of breaking Sabrina’s heart when Kiesha will never forgive me?

Sabrina senses that I’m still awake, rolling to her side and propping her head up with her elbow. “If there was someone else, you’d tell me, right?”

“Where’s this coming from?”

“We both know things between us have been bad. I really want us to work. To give our baby a family. A real one. A good one. Neither of us had that and I guess I’m saying if there were someone, I’d forgive you. It’d hurt to hear, but I’d accept it if you promised not to do it again.”

“Brina,” I whisper her name softly. The truth weighs on me. This is my chance to tell her everything, but as I lay here looking at her in the pale moonlight, I can’t bring myself to say the words that will shatter her heart.

I do the worst thing I can do. I press my lips to hers and strip off her clothes. I pretend she’s Kiesha as I yank my boxers off and put her hand on my dick. It takes some effort, but eventually she gets me hard enough to fuck her. If she notices that I don’t even get off, she doesn’t bring it up.

Lying to her is easy, but lying to myself is nearly impossible.

I don’t love Sabrina, and I don’t want a baby with her.

I turn my back on her, wishing I could go back to that night I slept with her and take it all back. Hell, if I could rewind time, I’d go back to the second I laid eyes on Kiesha and end it there. Because one look at her and I knew I was in danger. I wanted her then and there.

And now I’ve ruined any shot of being with her. I was so close I could taste it.

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