Page 28 of Healed Hearts

“Holden,” he says, relief dripping from the word. “Thank you so much for answering. Something’s wrong with Wren. I’m freaking out. I don’t know what to do.” His voice cracks, and I sit up, suddenly completely awake and alert.

“What’s going on?” I ask.

“She’s breathing strange? I think. I don’t know. I promise I didn’t go to Doctor Google, but she has more bruises now. On her back. I noticed them earlier when I was giving her a bath. And she’s pale. Way too pale. I don’t… I don’t know what to do. Why isn’t she getting better? She was supposed to be getting better.” His sentence ends with a sharp inhale.

I don’t know what possesses me to do it. This is so not my job, and I should tell him to call an ambulance if he’s worried. But he sounds… awful, and I can’t take that. So I throw the blankets off my body and spring from my bed. “I’m coming to you,” I say.

“What?” he asks. “Why?”

Fuck, I wish he wouldn’t have asked me that because truth be told, I have no idea, but it feels like something Ihaveto do.

“Julian,” I say, ignoring his question. “I need you to try to count her respiratory rate. Can you do that?”

“How? How do I do that?” Goddamn, he sounds wrecked. It makes my heart clench.

“Do you have a watch with a second hand?”

“Yeah. Yes. There’s a clock on my bedroom wall.”

“Okay, count each breath she takes and watch the clock. When it hits sixty seconds, let me know how many breaths she’s taken.”

I can hear him counting under his breath, but I mostly ignore it as I throw a pair of sweats and a t-shirt on and start packing a bag with my blood pressure machine and my stethoscope in it. The cuff is probably going to be way too big on her arm, but it’ll be better than nothing.

“Forty-three, I think,” he says, and my stomach drops out.Fuck.That’s high.

“What’s she doing?” I ask, hopeful that she’s been up playing, and he’s just freaking out for nothing.

“Sleeping.”

Double fuck.

“I’m on my way. Stay on the phone with me. But, Julian, if she gets worse, I want you to hang up and call an ambulance. If that happens, I’ll meet you at the hospital instead, okay?”

“Okay,” he whispers. Fuck, he sounds terrified.

“It’s going to be okay,” I say, but I have no right to be saying that because truthfully, I don’t know. There has to be something else going on. I was surprised when her folate came back low, but I read the results myself. And I did the same with her test results last week. She should be better now, not deteriorating.

Thankfully, Julian only lives about fifteen minutes from me, and I’m pulling into his driveway in no time. “I’m here,” I say, already shutting my car off and climbing out with my bag.

“Door’s unlocked. We’re in my room,” Julian says quietly. He’s more calm than before. Almost unnaturally calm.

Wren’s asleep in Julian’s lap when I get to them, and as his eyes connect with mine, his expression almost bowls meover. His eyes are red, his face tear-soaked, but he looks calm otherwise.

I rush over, pulling my stethoscope out of my bag, and lift her shirt without even explaining to Julian what I’m doing. Truthfully, she looks worse than he let on, and it’s freaking me the fuck out. Listening closely to her heartbeat, I count the beats two separate times, my own heart sinking as I do. It’s entirely too high, and it’s got me more nervous than I’d like to admit. I reach out, touching first her hands and then her feet. Ice-cold, despite the warmth in the room. She hasn’t stirred once since I’ve been touching her.

“Julian,” I say, looking up at him to find him already watching me. “She needs to go to the hospital. Get her stuff together. I’m going with you.”

Something flashes across his face. “I… I took a Xanax. I was having a panic attack and I… fuck, I fucked up. I can’t drive like this. It makes me so drowsy.” He sounds ashamed, but he shouldn’t be. That explains the unusual calm, though.

“I can drive. You get her stuff together and let’s go.”

He nods, gently lifting her off him and laying her down on the bed. He stands and grabs a small bag from in front of the closet door. “I’ve had this ready since the first time I brought her when they wanted us to come back after her first blood draw.”

I nod, leaning over to pick her limp body up. Once she’s tucked against my chest, I head out of the room and walk straight to Julian’s car. He’s right on my heels. I get her buckled into her seat, and she doesn’t even move.Fuck fuck fuck.This is not good. Julian climbs into the back seat and sits beside Wren, his body almost too big to be contained in the cramped space.

I force a deep breath into my lungs. Both of us freaking out won’t do any good. This is my fucking job. I can stay calm. I can. But, fuck. I like them both so much. With sudden clarity, I realize why we aren’t allowed to work on loved ones.

That thought stops me dead in my tracks, hand on the door handle to open the driver’s side door. Julian and Wren arenotmy loved ones. That thought shouldn’t even be in my head. Hedidtrust me with his daughter, though. I need to be worthy of that trust. Shaking those thoughts from my mind, I scramble into the car and pull out of the driveway.

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