Page 126 of Healed Hearts

Julian glances from me to the pile of clothes that are still on the bed. He pulls his lower lip between his teeth and narrows his eyes like he’s thinking really hard about something, and then he shrugs. “Fuck it.”

Fuck it? What does that even mean? He leans over the bed and scoops up all the rest of the clothes before unceremoniously dumping them on the floor in a heap. My jaw drops open. “Julian, what thefuckare you doing?”

He raises an eyebrow at me. “Celebrating.”

I don’t even have time to come up with a response because he lifts me up and throws me down on the bed. I would like it noted that I’m trying very hard to be stern and irritated, but I fear the giggle that flies from my lips gives me away.

Julian climbs up after me, covering my body with his. Well, that’s new. But not unwelcome. My stomach gives another flutter as he leans in and drops his lips to mine.

He’s careful to keep the majority of his weight from pressing me into the bed, but he still feels so fucking good on top of me. I bury my hands in his hair and drag him closer, slipping my tongue into his mouth.

His low groan sends sparks flying through my body, and my cock hardens rapidly against him. He deepens our kiss, his tongue finding its way into my mouth. It’s a little give and take and a lot hot. I’m getting better at this. Not to brag or anything. Bracing himself on one hand, he slides the other under my shirt, running his warm palm up my side as his thumb brushes along my stomach. I gasp against his lips, arching into his touch.

An unintelligible sound comes out of my mouth as heat spreads through me. He breaks our kiss and sits up, pulling his hand from my shirt. I’m about to argue when his deep brown eyes settle on mine. “Can I undress you?”

Oh fuck yes. I nod rapidly, and he wastes no time. He slides an arm behind me and sits me up. Yes. Hot. Love that. And lifts my shirt up and over my head, tossing it somewhere across the room. I giggle a bit because I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this way, and he chuckles along with me. “Sorry.”

I shake my head. “Nah, don’t be sorry.”

His lips tilt up in a smirk, then he’s dropping his gaze to my exposed upper body. “Jesus, Hold. You really don’t know how fucking sexy you look right now.”

He drops his mouth to my stomach and circles my belly ring with his tongue. I whimper, my hips rocking up on their own. Oh. That’s… not an erogenous zone I knew I had. Which, to be fair, before him, I never did anything like this. No one knew me or my body well enough to help me explore the things I like. He does it again, and I jolt, another needy sound leaving my lips.When he trails his tongue up my sternum, my chest heaves, my breath punching from my lungs. He glances up at me and pulls a nipple between his teeth. Holy fuck. Holy fuck. My fingers tangle back in his hair, trying to keep his mouth there becausemy God, are my nipples a direct line to my dick or something? “More,” I rasp, groaning when he listens and draws my nipple into his mouth.

He sucks and once again, I feel it in my cock. It throbs with each pull he gives my nipple. “Oh fuck, Julian.”

Julian releases my nipple and grins at me. “Feel good?”

I narrow my eyes at him. “You know it does. Ugh. Keep going.”

He chuckles, then gives my other nipple the same treatment. My fingers tighten in his hair before letting go entirely. “Pants,” I mumble, my entire body tingling and hot.

He pulls off my nipple and looks at me. “Pants? I need more words, darlin’.”

He’s smirking. Asshole knows exactly what he’s doing and what I want. I glare playfully at him and he grins. “Alright, alright. Pants off. Got it.” He slips his fingers into the waistband of the sweats I’m wearing and pulls them down past my hips. My cock springs free and he groans. “Fuck, Hold. I love your cock.”

As if to prove his point, he rubs his thumb along the underside of it. I shiver, and my hips lift off the bed. “You too,” I groan. “Clothes. Pants. Off.”

He strips quickly and when he’s done, he finishes taking my pants off. He crawls over my body and presses himself back to me, capturing my mouth once again. He rocks against me, dragging his cock along my thigh as his stomach rubs over mine.

We kiss with abandon, our bodies writhing against each other. I need more. I want more. I’m ready for more. I know it as much as I know my own name. I don’t want it because I want to wash away someone else’s touch. I don’t want it because I’m scared. Quite the opposite, actually. I want him inside me because it’shim. It’sus. Fuck, I love him. I break our kiss. “Lube,” I murmur, and Julian groans before flicking his tongue against my lower lip and lifting off me. He rummages through his nightstand for a second, then tosses a bottle of lube onto the bed. He spreads his legs wide, holding his thigh back. I’m confused for a second until I realize he thinks I want to top him.

I mean, I do. I so fucking do. But not right now. “How do you want to do this?” I ask as I grab his free hand and push the bottle of lube into it.

He gives me a strange look. “However you want.” It sounds like a question, but he opens the lube and slicks his fingers. Anticipation rushes through me. Fuck, I want this so badly.

He drops a hand between his legs and circles his hole with his fingertips. “Wait a second,” I say, and he pauses instantly.

“What’s wrong? Do you want to do it instead?”

Um, yeah. That’s the whole point. But I’m realizing that he still hasn’t gotten the memo. I guess I’m going to have to be direct. “The lube is for me, Jules.”

His eyebrows pull together. “Well, why did you hand it to me, then? I assumed you wanted me to do it myself.”

Jesus Christ. I giggle. “I do. To me.”

His eyebrows damn near shoot to his hairline. “What? I need you to spell this out for me, Holden.”

I take a deep breath, more certain than I’ve ever been in my entire life. “I want you to fuck me.”

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