Page 153 of The King has Fallen

But then, finally, she stepped out of the shadow behind the armoire, frowning.

“We’re alone,” she whispered. “But Jann doesn’t trust me anymore.”

I was tempted to make a joke about how that might be smart given how easily she’d ended the King, but her skin was still pale and her eyes were haunted. It was too soon.

Death left a stain. Always. And not just in the dirt.

“Was he your first?” I asked her gently.

She gave a wide berth to that dark puddle on the floor, but shook her head. “No.”

“So you truly are an assassin?”

“I am the best shadow walker of our kind,” she said with a humble, one-shouldered shrug. “I was born for this.”

“No. You were born for me,” I said gruffly.

Her eyes lit up then and she made a beeline for me, coming to stand at my feet, staring up at me like she didn’t quite believe I was real.

“Melek Handras—GeneralMelek Handras, I love you,” she said quietly. “I hate the decisions you’re making, but I love you.”

“I could say the same,” I said, trying for humor. I even managed a half-smile. But she just plowed on.

“You need to let us find Gall,” she said hurriedly, like she’d been thinking about it and anticipated that I wouldn’t be happy.

“Absolutely not. If he sees you—or anyone else for that matter—materializing out of a shadow, he might actually lose his mind.”

“And if my men return while you’re gone, what then?” she asked tightly.

I sucked in a breath. “Then you go, and you stay safe.”

“Melek—”

“No, Yilan. You gave me your word. I don’t want to leave you, either. I don’t want you gone. But if safety appears, you grasp it. You grasp it and cling until I make it through the ravine.”

“How the fuck are you going to make it to battle if you are putting yourself before a Judge tomorrow?”

“I’m trusting that if we are intended to survive this, God is going to find a way. And if we aren’t… well, then I wouldn’t have anyway, no matter what course I took.”

Her jaw flexed. “You say that so easily, as if walking away from me is—”

“Donotfinish that sentence,” I growled. “You know it isn’t true… Don’t you?”

She stared at me, but then she slowly nodded and her shoulders rolled forward. “I’m sorry, Melek, I’m just… there are so many other choices here and you’re refusing to see them.”

I sighed and stepped up to hold her arms, looking down at her so she’d see I was hiding nothing. “I have never denied that there are other ways to walk through this world,” I said quietly. “But if you believe that others follow me, then you must know they do it because I walk with integrity and to serve. To run now—or to take the throne by force—would fly in the face of everything I have ever claimed to be. I meant what I said, Yilan. If there is any blessing on me, it is because God is pleased with me. I will not call downHiswrath alongside the rest of this shit.”

“But then that means we will have no choice but to say goodbye,’ she said, her eyes welling again.

“I pray it isn’t goodbye, but…until we meet again.I pray that fervently, Yilan. I promise you, there is nothing that I want more than to gather up Gall and run with you. Hold you. Be with you. Turn my back on everything and everyone else.But… I can’t.”

Her forehead pinched, but she reached up to cup my face. “I know,” she whispered, blinking back her tears. “I do. I just…”She blew out a breath and looked down. “I’m sorry, Melek. I want to make love to you—it may be our last chance. But I can’t… not here. Not inhisbed—or even in this tent where he has violated so many.” She glanced over her shoulder and shuddered.

“It’s okay, Love,” I whispered, pulling her in. “I feel the same. I have some time. Gall needs some space to calm down. So we’ll use that to sit here and hold each other until your… friends return. Then we will say goodbye and I will find Gall.”

I heard her swallow. She didn’t nod, but she sighed and sat up, holding my face. “If you’re traveling tomorrow you need to keep up your strength. I’m sure there must be snacks here, or something in this tent. You can’t tell me that brute only ate at mealtimes.”

I shook my head. “I couldn’t eat,” I said quickly.

---