Page 150 of Kiss the Villain

“It’s not that.” I’m still speaking to the lamp. “Idiot. Asshole. God, I fucking hate you.”

“Stop saying that.”

“Idiot. Asshole.”

“The ‘I hate you’ part. Don’t say it. I don’t like it.”

I stare at him through blurry vision. “I hate you, hate you, hate you?—”

He grabs my jaw, leaning down, so that his face is a breath from mine. “I said. Stop it. Enough with the tantrum.”

My lips wobble and I try to pull away, but he keeps me locked in place. His demeanor feels all-encompassing, like I couldn’t escape him even if I tried.

“What on earth is your problem today, Carson?”

“What the hell isyourproblem?” I headbutt him for the first time in months. “And stop calling me by my last goddamn name.”

He flinches a bit, touching his forehead. Good. Hope it cracked so he’ll be in pain for a while.

“I wouldn’t if you hadn’t been a brat from the moment you walked into my class. Flirting with students in the jury, texting and smiling at God knows who, and challenging my authority.”

“That’s because youhumiliatedme.” I grab him by the collar of his shirt. “You’ve been an asshole since the case started, when I know I’m doing a good job. It’s not perfect, but I was trying mybest, aiming for approval you never gave me! You’re only using me, just like him! All of you are fucking bastards!”

His fingers tighten around my jaw. “Who ishim, Gareth?”

My stomach falls.

Well, at least he’s saying my name, even if his voice sounds the deepest I’ve ever heard.

“No one important.” I try to stand, but he shoves me back down on the desk so that he’s looming over me.

“Tell me and I’ll decide whether or not it’s important.”

“Fuck. Can I sit down first?”

He lets me, then steps between my legs, his hand still on my jaw, not allowing me to look anywhere but at him.

“I’m waiting,” he says when I don’t speak, his eyes looking more intense than a fucking nuke. Jeez.

I let out a long sigh. “I had a teacher who came into our house, Mr. Laurent. He taught me and Killian French. I was around ten at the time and was already beginning to realize that my brother and I were different from other kids. But Kill still managed to make all the teachers like him, while I was always alone, feeling suffocated by humans. Laurent saw it differently. He always praised me in front of my parents and told me I was smart and brighter than Kill. It was the first time a teacher had done that, and I got intoxicated by the feeling.”

Kayden’s other hand falls to my waist, tightening slightly. “Did he…groom you?”

“Not really? I don’t think so.”

“Fuck, Gareth. Did he assault you?”

“No. But heusedme.” I snort out a laugh. “Apparently Mr. Laurent’s sister was taken by the New York Russian mafia, so he’d pay his debt, and since I’m related to them on my mom’s side, he took me to his house, saying it was for a lesson, and then locked me up in the basement. The fucking weakling was crying while he did it, saying he didn’t want to, but it was my fault for being born into a rotten family.”

“And then what happened?” His voice is soft, so soft, and he’s holding my cheek in his palm now, and I’m leaning into it, because, apparently, I really love it when he shows me this side.

“It didn’t last long, maybe a day. He called my aunt saying he’d release me if they let his sister go and erase his debt. My aunt kind of blew his house down.” I chuckle. “She and her husband came with an army and shot him to death. She tried to shield me, but I saw his corpse. His head was blown up and his intestines were on the floor. But I was mostly fascinated by his dead eyes and wanted to see more of that. Dead people. Especially if they fucking lied to me or used me. I wanted them all dead.

“Ever since then, I don’t trust teachers or people in general. It made my already existing trust issues so bad.” I grip the desk tighter so I don’t touch him. “Which is why I never stayed with anyone like I’ve stayed with you.”

“Because you trust me?”

“Maybe. I don’t know. But when you…”