Page 6 of Beach Vibes

“What about you?” Jana asked. She waved toward the food. “You’re a sandwich artist, and you love what you do, but from the little you’ve shared with me, you don’t have much of a personal life. You live with your aunt, which is nice. Multigenerational homes are the best. You hang out with your brother everycouple of weeks. You volunteer here. But that’s not enough. You need to have things to look forward to. Friends. Possibly a man.”

Beth willed herself not to flush. If Jana, who was firmly in the new friend category, could figure all that out in a matter of seconds, how obvious were her issues? Was she secretly wearing a “pity me, I don’t have a life” sign?

“You’re right, of course,” she murmured. “Only now I feel broken.”

“Not broken. Not for either of us. Just a little misguided with our priorities. Seeing the billboard was a good thing. It allowed you to see what was bothering you in your life, and now you can fix it.”

She was being so nice, Beth thought, and immediately had the strangest urge to blurt out, “Will you be my best friend?” Only she thought that might be a little scary to sayandto hear. But she liked Jana. They’d clicked from the start and had laughed their way through her training. Beth always looked forward to their quick dinners together.

“You’re right,” she said. “I need to make changes. The food bank is a start. I really like working here. It’s satisfying.”

“I agree. So, next up would be what? Dating?”

“I’m not the dating type.”

The response was automatic, mostly because she couldn’t imagine going out with someone—only where was that coming from? Why shouldn’t she be happy with someone? Her marriage to Ian had failed, but that was about them, not the institution. There were aspects to being married she’d really liked. Despite how she was currently living her life, she wasn’t by nature a solitary person.

“I don’t believe you.” Jana studied her. “You’re attractive, successful, smart and what? Thirty-five?”

“Thirty-eight, and I’m not smart. I could never do what you’re doing.”

“Medical billing? Yeah, you could. You’re an entrepreneur, so I’m not sure you’d want to, but you could.”

Despite her unease, Beth grinned. “No, go to college. I thought I would, a long time ago, but I’m not college material.”

Jana frowned. “Why would you say that? You run a business. The day I met you, you’d just finished a class to learn the new software system you were having installed. People you’d met there were texting you, asking you questions, and you weren’t the instructor.”

“I understood it more easily than some of the other people. The program is very close to the one I had before. I didn’t have their steep learning curve.”

Jana finished her chips. “I remain unconvinced. Whoever said you weren’t smart was wrong, and you need to get that voice out of your head.”

Beth responded with a smile, thinking that particular voice had only told her the truth to spare her pain. Rick had always looked out for her. He was three years her junior, and practically a genius. When they’d been younger, he’d been the one to help her with her homework. In fourth grade, he’d understood her middle school math better than she had. When she’d asked him about going to college, he’d gently pointed out there was no way she could make it. A good thing, because she loved owning the sandwich shop.

Thinking that reminded her of why she was upset. “You’re right about me not having something to look forward to,” she said slowly. “Emotionally, I’ve moved on from the divorce, but him getting married is a tangible demonstration of how over us he is. I guess I need something similar.”

“Without the billboard proposal?” Jana asked, wrinkling her nose. “I don’t want to judge.”

Beth laughed. “And yet you are. Don’t worry. I’m judging, too.” She lowered her voice. “It was right next to an ad for apersonal injury attorney. Really? You know they came by later and took pictures. They’re going to have to edit them for sure.”

Jana grinned at her. “I kind of like your style.” She leaned forward. “Okay, just say the first thing that pops into your head. What have you always wanted to do but never let yourself?”

“Learn to ride a horse.”

Beth had no idea where the unexpected statement had come from, and she immediately tried to call it back. “No, that’s silly. There’s no purpose in horseback riding.”

“So? It sounds like fun. Why haven’t you done it before?”

An interesting question. Beth considered her answer. “I wanted to when I was a kid, but Mom never believed in doing normal things. She would have wanted me to learn bull riding instead. When I was an adult, there didn’t seem to be time or money. Once Ian and I were married, I guess I forgot I wanted to learn.” She paused. “I really don’t have an answer.”

“Maybe it’s something you should consider doing just for you.”

“Maybe.” Beth wasn’t sure she ever did anything just for herself.

“Was the divorce bad?” Jana asked. “I know sometimes they can be really hard to get through.”

Beth shook her head. “No. We were both reasonable.” She hesitated, not sure if she should say more. Except for her aunt, no one knew what had really happened at the end of her marriage.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” Jana told her. “I wasn’t trying to pry.”

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