Page 7 of Beach Vibes

“Oh, I know that. It’s not you. I guess sometimes it’s hard for me to share personal stuff.” But she found herself wanting Jana to know. “It wasn’t the divorce itself that hurt so much. It was how we got to that place. Ian came to me and said he wasn’t happy. He didn’t know if he wanted to try to fix things or not. I had no idea he wasn’t okay with us, so I was in shock.” She shook her head. “Actually, I was scared. I didn’t want to lose him or us. I liked being married to him.”

“I’m sorry. What happened?”

“We agreed to do all the things. Counseling, long walks on the beach, writing in a gratitude journal.” She opened her bag of chips, but didn’t eat any as she remembered how she’d thrown herself into connecting with her husband.

“It was a tough couple of months, but I knew it would be worth it. We started having more sex and laughing together. It was working, or so I thought.”

Jana groaned. “Oh, no! He didn’t agree with you?”

“Nope. We met with our counselor to assess where we were. I went on and on about how wonderful everything was and how I was so much more in love with Ian than I’d ever been.” She drew in a breath and ignored the sense of having been a fool. “He said he hadn’t changed his mind. He was still unhappy, and he wanted a divorce. I moved out two days later.”

“I’m so sorry. No wonder his getting married is bothering you. How dare he be happy!”

Beth managed a smile. “I’m over him. It took a while. The remodel helped by being a really big distraction.” One she’d been grateful for. “I don’t think about him or us or want to go back.” She thought about what her friend had said. “But you’re right. I haven’t made much of a life for myself. Seeing the billboard was a wake-up call. I’ve made good changes in my business. Now it’s time to make a few changes for myself.”

“Absolutely.” Jana raised her can of flavored sparkling water, and they toasted. “Good for you. Think about the horse thing. Oh, and the next time a hunky guy asks you out, say yes.”

“There aren’t any hunky guys hanging around. But should one appear, I’ll consider it.” She smiled. “Okay, enough about my drama. How are you doing?”

Jana pressed her hands to her chest. “I’m loving Dex Thursday.”

“Excuse me? What’s a Dex Thursday?”

Jana laughed. “That’s right. You don’t know about my oddlittle family. Dex is my brother Teddy’s best friend. They’ve been finishing each other’s sentences since they were nine. Dex had some issues with his folks, so he moved in with us.” She frowned slightly. “I guess he was maybe fourteen when that happened. Anyway, he’s like another brother to me, and he’s an uncle to my brother’s kids and to Linnie.”

She took a bite of her cookie. “A few months after Teddy lost his wife, Dex started taking his kids to hang out at his place on Thursday nights. They order in and watch movies. It became a thing. Well, Linnie’s been seeing this and begging to go, but I thought she was too young. When she turned four, she announced she was more than ready to be with her cousins. Dex agreed, and now we have Dex Thursdays. He picks Linnie up from preschool, gets Teddy’s kids and does his thing.”

She glanced at her watch. “He has them home by seven thirty.”

Beth stared at her. “Wait a minute. You’re saying Thursday afternoon is the only day of the week you don’t have your daughter, and you’re using your free time to volunteer at the food bank?”

Jana looked surprised by the question. “I was volunteering before, but I had to arrange for childcare. This makes it easier.”

“You’re a better person than I am,” Beth murmured.

“Hardly. I have to volunteer. It’s kind of in my blood. My parents are currently in Africa with their church, building a school. It’s how Teddy and I were raised.” Jana waved her hand. “You’re making it more than it is. Besides, you’re a giver, too.”

“I volunteer four hours a week, and I’ve only been doing it a couple of months. That hardly makes me a giver.”

“No way. I don’t agree.” Jana’s voice was firm. “You brought me dinner. A couple of weeks ago, I mentioned how I went directly from my last class to my job and there wasn’t ever time to get lunch. You instantly wanted to feed me. You’re very much a giver—you simply show it differently.”

Beth squirmed at the praise. “It was a sandwich.”

“Technically, I believe it was a wrap, and it was delicious. You saw someone in need and you responded. You should give yourself a little credit.”

“Not something I’m comfortable doing,” she said before she could stop herself. “And here we are talking about me again. Your turn for a little psychoanalysis. Why do you deflect the conversation from yourself?”

She asked the question lightly, as much to tease as to seek information. She liked Jana and wanted to get to know her better.

“I’m a single mom who’s working part-time and going to college. I spend every second of every day scrambling. I find your life calm and serene.” Jana laughed. “Something I can only aspire to.”

Calm and serene? Did she really mean boring? Because that was how Beth was starting to feel about herself.

“Calm is overrated. Embrace the chaos.”

“I’m trying.” Jana drew in a breath. “Okay, I’m just going to say it. I haven’t told anyone yet, and I don’t know how I feel about it.”

Beth leaned forward. “Now I’m intrigued.”

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