Page 79 of Vicious Little Princess

“You mean, sexually?”

“Pretty much. So that’s one of the reasons I didn’t want to risk letting anything else happen. Not until you’re back to full strength and able to handle the aggression. Because I don’t know if I can control it when I’m in this state of not wanting to tamper down the other part of it, the battle born part.”

I frowned as I took her words in, her pained confession.

What this worldandthis mission were doing to her.

What she thought she needed to be in order to survive it all.

“You’ve been in combat before and gone all out, but you’ve then pulled it back. So something must have triggered this. Not being able to let go of it, I mean. And being so determined not to as well. Feeling that initial helplessness of being kidnapped and scrambling to find me after that?”

“Those were definitely factors for why it went down like that. But it remaining this way, it’s something else. And I know exactly what.”

I stared at her expectantly, waiting with bated breath.

But she got that faraway look in her eyes again and then slumped back against the couch.

“Cat?” I pressed carefully.

She blew out a breath and then burst out in a disjointed rush, “I thought I might be, but I’d pushed it into the background with everything else happening… but I was late… I convinced myself that it was stress, the nightmare going on around us.” She shoved both hands through her hair. “What I told you about everything being fine with the doctor’s checkup was true, but there was something else. I wanted to keep it to myself. One, so I’d have some time to sort out my thoughts. And two, because now is absolutely not the fucking time for this. But… us talking like this… you being so brave earlier… I just… I had to tell you.”

Christ.“You’re actually saying that you’re—”

“I’m pregnant.”

17

~Caterina~

Julian stared at me, openmouthed.

The shock of what I’d just confessed was like the wheels had suddenly stopped turning for him and he needed a few moments to get them moving again.

I pushed off the couch and started pacing, something that I’d clearly picked up from Nico.

Julian cleared his throat and then finally spoke for the first time in what had seemed like minutes. “Well, that’s… unexpected.”

“Unexpected?”I scoffed. “Really? That’s toning it down in a huge way, don’t you think?”

“You’re on birth control, but you’ve also been on a couple of courses of antibiotics, so it must have interfered and—”

“Yeah, I get it. I’ve already done the math as to thehow-the-hellof it all.”

“Okay, well, the most important thing is, how do you feel about it?”

“The most important thing? We’re at war and I’m pregnant, Julian!”

He grabbed his cane and rose to his feet, coming to me and taking my hand. “Take a deep breath. Or several.”

He gave my hand a squeeze, then stroked my fingers in a clear attempt to ease my skyrocketing panic.

Putting it out there, actually telling someone, had made it undeniably real all of a sudden. It’d had all the implications slamming into me all at once.

“You need to take all the rest out of the equation for now. The timing, the circumstances surrounding us. We can deal with that. We can always find a way. But, first and foremost, when it comes to this, you need to determine howyoufeel about it. Nothing else matters beyond that at this juncture.”

“Thank you,” I said, at him being so sweet and thoughtful.

“Of course, darlin’.”

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