Page 34 of On the Beat

Ryder says nothing, my attempt at levity falling flat.

“My two brothers are Gabriel and Francisco. I have a younger sister, Analyn, and she’s a senior in high school,” I offer, staring at the ceiling fan. “They’re all going into the medical profession.”

He makes a strangled noise that I can’t interpret before saying, “You’re the black sheep of the family?”

Why would that matter to him? I rack my brain for a reason he would care and come up empty. “Yes, and? Are you going to ostracize me for it?”

“Your defensiveness is noted.”

“I’m not—” I throw another pillow at him. It hits him squarely in the chest, and he sits up, catching the cushion in his lap. “I love my family, but they can be… a lot.”

“Is that why you left New York?”

The night I left New York is one I won’t forget any time soon, but I doubt he wants to hear about it. I’ve already given him too much ammunition to use against me, when I’m supposed to be prying information out of him. “You know, I think I’ve said too much.”

“And I haven’t said nearly enough in your eyes, right?” His eyebrows quirk up.

“Paulo’s favourite snack isturon,” I blurt out before I can stop myself. “Tita Evangeline told me. If you’re still down to plan that birthday party. I mean, his birthday is in December.”

December. It’s already late October here; the time has flown by somehow.

His brows contract. “And what exactly isturon?”

Ryder’s horrendous pronunciation of the word would make me laugh if we were friends. Too bad—or all too well, I guess—that we’re not. “I’ll tell you, if you tell me something you’ve never told anyone else.”

I don’t expect him to respond. In fact, I wait for the door to slam shut, for him to walk me back to my side of the suite, or even for him to kick me out while he searches up whatturonis.

Instead, he doesn’t do any of those things. He swings his legs off of the bed and gets up, leaning against the dresser. Ryder picks up his guitar and strums a few chords. Over the gentle music, he says, “I once killed a man.”

I almost want to react before stilling my face, seeing the faint laugh lines around his mouth.

“Something true,” I clarify, seeing the mistake in the vagueness of my words. “A real secret.”

“You tell me yours first.”

“My boyfriend dumped me after I told him I quit nursing to become a journalist.” I’ve never told anyone that, not even Kaiden. When I became his roommate, I told him I came to L.A. to pursue acting but it didn’t pan out. The pain of that one night when Rodrigo left me still stings, sometimes. I wave at him to continue, to give me something of worth. “Your turn?”

“I hate my sister, sometimes.” He sets down the guitar with one last flourish and points at the door. “Was that enough for you?”

“It’ll do,” I say as I get up to leave, gladly stretching my limbs now that I’m out of the uncomfortable chair. Still, my reply is on autopilot, my mind whirring with the meanings behind his answer. His sister is Poppy Black—that much, I know—and she was recently fired fromLa Modefor… what?

Does it have to do with Ryder’s sometimes hatred of her?

“I can hear you thinking from here,” he yells as I walk out the door. “Try not to be too obsessed with me.”

I let the door slam shut behind me.

Chapter 17: Ryder Black

Scribbling on a pad of paper, trying to come up with lyrics for a song, I find myself making a list instead.

Things I don’t want to think about:

Isla Romero

My sister

Eddie

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