Page 24 of How a Vampire Falls

“In that case, you’re officially invited.”

“Oh. Good to know.” There it was, the crooked smile and the crinkle between his eyes.

“But don’t think you can distract me from an explanation.”

He ignored the levity in her words; instead his smile flattened. “I know.”

Leslie tugged the hand she was still holding, led him back along the trail until trees sheltered them from any hint of a long-distance view or drop. They sat side-by-side on two boulders that seemed to have been placed off the path for this purpose. Ryker’s fingers wove between hers, and his grip was strong. She ran her thumb along his knuckles, and he watched their linked hands with fixed attention.

At last he looked up and met her eyes. His face was nearly blank, but she focused on every tiny movement, and she saw past the blankness to the humiliation and…shame.

“You can tell me,” she said.

He nodded, but another few seconds passed before he spoke. “Have you ever seen a catatonic vampire before?”

“Definitely not.”

Another nod. “You know how humans do the fight-flight-or-freeze thing?”

“Sure.”

“Our version looks like…um, like what I just did. Statue mode. Playing dead. One or both depending on the situation. I came to flat on my back, so I guess I did both this time.”

“I touched you,” she said. “I nudged you back from the edge, and you toppled.”

He shut his eyes and gave a soft groan.

Gently she said, “You’re afraid of heights.”

“No. I’m afraid of falling.”

She had set him up for the worst possible shock and terror. Her heart throbbed with an extra-hard beat. “I know I couldn’t have known about this, but still—I’m really sorry.”

He opened his eyes and looked at her as if she were speaking Latin. “I’m the one who should be sorry, Leslie. It’s a stupid, stupid fear.”

“Why would it be stupid?”

“Are you serious? I’m a vampire. Last night I jumped off the second-story hotel balcony to the parking lot when I could’ve taken the stairs. So it’s not heights. It’s a height that’stoohigh. When I know I wouldn’t land on my feet. Even if there’s a guardrail—crap, even if there’s a window or a perfectly sturdy glass floor for tourists—my brain and my body start screaming at me that I’m going to fall and die. It’s so stupid. But I can’tnotfreak out, no matter how hard I try.”

The gush of words ended, and he closed his eyes again, as if he couldn’t look at her now that she knew. Leslie used her free hand to cup the side of his face, and his eyes fluttered open, surprise layering over the shame.

“Leslie,” he said, and her name was like a song when he said it this way.

She wanted him to hear the song from her too. She unfurled the lure in her voice as she rarely did, even with her parents. Habit had nearly made her forget how—but only nearly. She said, “Ryker.”

He gave a single shiver, and a strange sort of triumph hummed in her veins.

“No shame,” she said. “Not with me.”

His mouth thinned. “It’s stupid.”

“It’s part of you, and you are not stupid.”

“I’m a vampire who’s afraid of falling.”

She squeezed his hand. He was still clinging hard to hers. “It’s just fear, Ryker. No one’s immune to it. Listen to me,” she said when he shook his head. “I’m here with you. I’m here for you. And there isno shamewith me.”

He closed his eyes. He drew a deep breath and let it out slowly, so slowly, over the course of a full minute. At last, sounding almost childlike, he said, “I’m not stupid?”