Page 44 of Salacious Devotion

“Do you have them often?”

“Sometimes,” I whisper. It’s always the same. I’m stuck in that fucking bank for what feels like hours, waiting to die. In reality, the entire event lasted less than a minute. The part I keep reliving was only a few seconds long.

I sniffle. “I’m sorry.”

Dane leans me back and looks me in the eyes. “Don’t ever apologize for what that piece of pond scum has done to you, Paige. Never. Got it?”

I nod.

“I don’t give a fuck if you wake up screaming every night for the rest of our lives. I have you. That’s all that matters. When I hear you scream and feel you thrashing around, it reminds me we’re both alive and we found each other.”

“Okay,” I exhale. My heart settles.

“If you ever want to talk about it, I will always listen. If you want to talk to a therapist, I can arrange that, too. If you don’t want to utter a word, that’s also fine.”

I lean into him, spent, drained, heavy. On nights like this, I lose sleep and feel so tired the next day. “I saw a counselor for the first two years,” I tell him.

He strokes my hair. “Someone working with the FBI?”

“Yes.”

“Was it helpful?”

I shrug. “Maybe, but sometimes it comes back anyway. Sometimes it happens every night for weeks at a time.”

Dane draws in a slow breath. I can feel his anger. It’s palpable. He’s holding it in because he wants to be calm for me, but it’s barely contained beneath the surface.

I purse my lips because I don’t want to argue with him about hunting down Damion Tombeck again, not in the middle of the night. I’m so tired.

Dane slides us back down to the mattress, pulls the covers over us, and spoons me. He holds my wrists in one of his hands in that way I love. He kisses my temple. “Sleep, baby. I’ve got you. I will always have you.”

Will he, though? Will he have me after he goes after Tombeck and gets himself killed?

“Are you going to turn off the light?” I ask.

“Do you want me to?”

I shake my head. “No.”

“I didn’t think so.” Another kiss to my shoulder. “I should have left it on. I noticed you never turned off the lights in your apartment.”

I smile. “You watched me sleep.”

“Every night, baby.”

I suspected he did, but knowing it makes me feel even more protected. I close my eyes and let sleep drag me back under.

Chapter 15

Dane

* * *

“Nervous?” I set my hands on Paige’s shoulders. She’s standing at the entrance to my home office, chewing her bottom lip. She’s been here a while, not going in.

“Petrified.”

“You’ll catch up with the latest technology fast, baby. I’m certain of it. When we were dating you knew far more than me about computers, coding, and programming.”

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