Page 34 of Skull

“I’ve always done what I had to,” he murmured, each word a struggle against the tide of guilt and longing. “I was raised to be tough, to never falter. But tonight, I’m not sure how much longer I can hold it all in. I’m scared… so scared of losing him.”

His mother’s response was soft yet imbued with a fierce tenderness born of a lifetime of shared love and loss. “You carry his strength in you, sweetheart. He is aware that you love him. How can he not see that, even if you never said it out loud? Let your heart speak now, even if it’s hard to do so. It’s okay.”

Inside, Skull’s mind was a whirlwind of memories of the proud, unyielding man he’d idolized during childhood, the father who had been both invincible and tender, and the harsh reality that his own vulnerability was now the price of love. He’d been all about determination, that hard resolve anchored him with a sense of invincibility. But now faced with a quiet reckoning, a truth he had long buried beneath layers of duty and hardened resolve.I must be strong, but I must also be honest with my heart,he thought.I need to tell him, even if it’s too late, that I love him more than words could ever express.

He took a shaky breath. “What can I do?” he managed. The moment the words left his lips, he felt his armor slip. His mother told him to keep praying, to stay strong. She promised she’d call with any updates. He told her he loved her, words that rarely found their way into conversation.

As the line went dead, Skull remained rooted to the wall, feeling both the crushing weight of duty and the uncomfortable, finally acknowledged vulnerability. In that fragile moment, he understood that being a SEAL, a son, and a man who longed for love were not mutually exclusive. They were threads in the tapestry of his being, a tapestry that now, more than ever, needed the truth. His father was irreplaceable, that the man he had always aspired to be was defined not only by strength but by the capacity to love and feel deeply.

His mind flashed back to the last time he’d visited, bustling hospital corridors, antiseptic smells, the steady beep of monitors. His mom’s voice had quivered as she explained that his dad was on a ventilator, barely conscious. Skull’s pulse roared in his ears. He wanted to talk to his father, to say what had been trapped inside him all his life, trying to live up to his interpretation of strength that had gotten him through a lot, including BUD/S. But he couldn’t leave. Things were heating up, and Hazard and Leigh were running out of time. He just had to pray that his dad would pull through and he would be able to tell him how he felt.

His mind drifted to Walker and all his bullshit up to this point. She had gotten under his skin because he had let her. That was the bottom line. He loved the way she teased him, tried to handle him in her special way, worked him over when she got way too close, and his deep desire to form a bond with her, something deep and abiding just like his parents enjoyed.

The way she smiled at him, gentle yet piercing, like she could see into the parts of his soul he tried to hide. He was falling for her, and that alone rattled him more than anything he’d ever had to endure.

Being vulnerable was never easy for him, and the memory of how he’d felt as a boy overwhelmed him. He’d spent too long building defenses, fueling that instinct to stand firm against any threat. But Walker made him want to share more, be more. And yet, that part of him, the one still answering to the old command “Be a rock,” fought tooth and nail to keep from cracking wide open.

With his father’s life hanging by a thread, Skull felt torn in two directions. The man was determined to be invincible, and the son terrified of losing the person who’d once told him he had to stand strong. This was the real test, he realized. Being a rock didn’t mean closing off all feelings. It meant enduring the pain that came with those feelings and carrying on despite it.

For a long time, Skull sat there in the quiet, memories, and hopes colliding. He pressed his phone against his chest as if clutching a lifeline. If his father pulled through this, Skull promised himself he’d do better. He’d stop letting that childhood ghost scare him away from what mattered. He’d stop pretending he was impervious and accept that love and vulnerability weren’t weaknesses, but signs he was finally standing on his own two feet, strong enough to handle whatever came next.

Skull’s grip on the phone slipped from his fingers as if it weighed a ton. His vision blurred and his knees suddenly buckled beneath him. Before he knew it, his back hit the wall, and he slid down to the floor in a slow, defeated collapse. Every breath shuddered as tears spilled over his cheeks, hot and unyielding. He didn’t even fight them this time. The fear for his dad had built to a tidal wave that refused to be contained.

In his mind, the image of his father who had always been so strong, so full of life flashed and faded. Those large hands that had once ruffled his hair or gripped his shoulder in reassurance, the deep voice that had boomed with laughter or gentle encouragement. His dad was the living embodiment of the rock he’d always told Skull to be. And now he was powerless on a ventilator, a cruel twist in the story of a man who had never bent beneath life’s hardships.

In that mix came his feelings for Hazard,Archer, a man he’d spend untold training hours with, fought alongside on the battlefield, laughed with through all the team’s crazy antics, bled and sweated with, faced untold danger, and all those unbreakable, life affirming moments of sheer friendship, an unshakable brotherhood, a bond that could never be broken. Then there was Leigh, mouthy, strong, a fearless proponent for justice who had gone through hell to apprehend Alzate. It was a slap in her face to trade the bastard for their lives, their happiness, their future. All of those emotions coalesced into a hard ball of fear, grief, resolve, and hope inside of him.

The tears came faster. Skull tried to steady himself, but his heart felt like it was splitting under the stress of everything. His father’s life hanging by a thread, the weight of his responsibilities as a SEAL, and the sudden awareness of his own vulnerability. All those years, he’d relentlessly clung to the rock mindset, fearless, strong-willed, determined never to show weakness was a study in isolating himself from everything that mattered, blinding him to how much he needed others, how much he needed the love and reassurance he usually shrugged off.

Now, though, he couldn’t pretend. Couldn’t keep up the act. If there was even a small chance his father might not make it, no show of bravado would ease the ache in Skull’s chest. He buried his face in his hands, sobs shaking his shoulders, feeling like a small boy again in that hospital corridor from years ago. Only this time, his father wasn’t there to say, “Be a rock,” and somehow that made it hurt even more.

A soft sound at the door. Skull blinked through his tears to see Walker standing there, her eyes wide and full of concern. Her presence washed over him in a wave of both comfort and fresh anxiety. He didn’t want her to see him like this—raw, undone—but the lie of pretending he was fine felt more painful than the truth of his anguish.

She crossed the room in a quiet rush, kneeling beside him, her hand gentle against his shoulder. He looked up at her, his face streaked with tears, and for the first time he didn’t hide behind a mask of toughness. He let her witness every fractured piece of his heart.

“Walker,” he rasped, voice thick with sorrow.

“What is it?” she asked.

For so long, he’d seen vulnerability as a crack in his armor—a weakness best hidden. He’d fended for himself, refusing to lean on anyone. But as he felt Walker’s heartbeat against his chest, Skull realized that the connection he’d always resisted was exactly what he needed. In that moment, the iron-willed man saw past his own blind spots, understanding that lowering his guard to someone who cared wasn’t a betrayal of his strength. It was a new kind of power, born from trust rather than solitude. And maybe—if he dared to let himself feel it—it could lead to the love he’d never quite believed was possible.

“My dad…I’m losing him,” he choked, the admission ripping more tears out of him. “He always told me to be strong…and I don’t know how to be strong without him.”

“I’m here,” she whispered, her own eyes glistening. She eased herself closer, sliding her arms around him until he could rest his head against her shoulder. He hesitated, but only for a moment, then he let the tension go, sinking into her warmth. Walker tightened her hold on him. “You’re strong in ways you don’t even realize,” she said softly. “Didn’t you just tell me I didn’t have to do everything alone…how about you? Don’t you need to hear the same words?” She turned to him, cupping his face in her hands, her voice fierce. “You’re not alone.”

He clung to those words, letting them settle into the cracks of his battered spirit. He was a man whose life was defined by duty and unflinching resolve, but here, tonight, he allowed himself to be simply a son fearing the loss of his father. A man on the cusp of taking steps toward something uncertain, scary, with the possibility of so much reward if he could find a way to show her that together they had something very special, and at the same time, desperate to show the woman in his arms that he could be a safe place for her, too.

“Walker,” he whispered again, lifting his head just enough to look her in the eye. “I need you….”

She brushed a tear from his cheek with gentle fingers. “I’m here for you,” she murmured.

And so, in the hush of that bedroom, Skull let the tears fall. He embraced the tremors of fear that wracked his chest, and in doing so, found a deeper courage than he’d ever drawn on before. He was a rock, just not the cold, immovable monolith he once believed he had to be. Instead, he felt himself become something different, a man strong enough to reach for what he wanted, strong enough to break, and strong enough to heal.

Skull sat in the dim glow of his room, the echoes of their chase for Blade still ringing in his ears, the legitimate fear and concern he had for Walker burst through him, having to be suppressed so he could do his job. His thoughts churned with another kind of fear, one sharpened by the memory of Bones, that damn amazing dog, a loyal partner, and the mission that had pushed him to the edge. Amidst the chaos, pursuit, and heart-stopping danger, Bones had protected Walker with the kind of unrelenting courage Skull knew was there. As the dog handler, he and Bones had been the silent, determined force behind the successful chase of a high-value target. In that relentless pursuit, he had proven his worth to his team, to his country, and to himself. Yet all of it felt laced with an unbearable cost.

He replayed the moment when he had thought he should go home to be with his family. A single, paralyzing thought had frozen him in place. What if he’d given in to his fear and left and had rushed back home to his ailing father? The decision he made to continue with this mission was more than a tactical choice. It was a sacrifice that carved deep into his soul. Serving his country meant he might never get the chance to see his father again, never tell the man who had always been his rock just how much he meant to him.

Skull’s thoughts pounded as fiercely as the mission’s adrenaline.My brothers needed us. We had our roles to play. But at what cost?He had always been a tough, unyielding force who never admitted vulnerability. Yet tonight, that hardened exterior began to crumble under the weight of his responsibilities, his duty, and the searing, aching possibility of not being there when his father died. His heart whispered confessions he’d long kept buried. “I never told him I loved him. I never said he was the best father in the world.”

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