Page 219 of Savage Brothers MC: Tennessee Chapter

Chapter24

Rory

I’m choking on fear,barely noticing as the nursing staff and doctors come running in.

“Wait outside please,” I’m ordered by one of them, but I don’t move.I just stand there watching them working on Noah.

My body quakes.I’m trembling so hard you would think there’s an earthquake centered directly underneath me.I gasp, jump slightly when I feel arms come around me.I look up to see Gavin there.

“Come on, sweetheart.Give them room to work,” he says.His face looks sad, his deep blue eyes are on me and there’s so much concern in them that I lose it.I give him my weight and I let the anguish out.

“Fuck,” he mutters and somehow, I hear that over my tears.He gathers me up, pulling me against his body and up into his arms so that he’s carrying me like a small child.I barely realize that I’m not standing anymore, I bury my head against his shoulder.

“I don’t want Noah to die,” I cry, the words broken and abnormally loud to my ears, but I’m gone.I can’t be strong anymore.I can’t.I could be strong while Noah’s heart was still beating.I could be strong as long as I didn’t have to face more death, but now?Now, I’m just done.I can’t deal with anything.“I know he hated me, but… God, Gavin, I love him,” I cry.I was wrong.I thought that I had cried enough tears, that I couldn’t cry anymore.But, these tears are flowing so hard I can only gasp and shudder to get oxygen to my lungs.These tears are coming so fast and so hard, that they are physically painful.It feels like each and every one of them is being torn from my insides.They’re so painful that it wouldn’t surprise me if they were tears of blood.They feel like they should be.

“Is he…” I hear Crusher’s voice, but I can’t look at him.I feel Gavin sit down and then I’m shifted so I’m curled on his lap.

“Dead,” I cry, hating the word, hating Crusher,hating Noah.

“They’re working with him,” Gavin says over me and I feel his rough hands in my hair, trying to soothe me.

“Motherfucker,” Crusher growls and I hear his chair scrape harshly against the tiled floor.

“Rory, you need to calm down and get control,” Gavin warns.“Ryan will be back soon and that little boy is going to need you.”The words are soft against my ear, but I’m too far gone.

“I don’t want him to die, Gavin.Even knowing he’s not mine to keep, I don’t want him to die,” I tell him in between gulping breaths.

“Rory, you?—”

“It was okay when I thought he was already dead, I didn’t have to face it.I kept it in the back of my mind, but this… Oh God, Gavin!I’m not strong enough,” I cry.“I’m not strong enough to withstand it again, not now,” I moan.“He’s dead, Gavin.Dead.How will I survive?How will I tell Ryan?”I ask, shuddering in a jerky movement as the tears continue to flow.

“Rory?”I hear Ryan’s scared voice hit me and I thought it couldn’t get worse.I really thought it couldn’t.

“Shit,” I hear Gavin mutter, but my body is locked.I see my sweet, innocent boy.Pain and fear are carved on his perfect little face, as he stands there by Dragon.

I don’t know what I’m doing, I don’t know where I find the strength, but I slide from Gavin’s lap.I instinctively go to the floor, partly because I know my legs won’t hold me and partly because I want to be eye level with my boy.

“Baby,” I whimper to Ryan, holding out my arms.

“Daddy… did you say… is he…”

His little body is solid, standing perfectly still, but his face is pure terror.

“Come here, baby,” I whisper, holding my arms open.

For a minute, I think he will reject me.His face turns and he looks at Gavin, and then back behind him to Dragon.I expect him to go to Dragon.Dragon is part of his family, part of the group who have always been there for him.It hurts, but only because if I allow myself to think about it, Ryan is all I have.He’s my…family.I feel Gavin’s hand on my shoulder and I start to shift to get up, but I don’t get the chance.Ryan comes running, throwing his body into mine.I catch him, wrapping my arms around him.

“Daddy,” he cries and the sound of that one word is as anguished as I feel.

“It will be okay, baby.It will be okay,” I lie.“It will be okay,” I assure him, knowing inside that nothing will ever be okay again.

Nothing.

Chapter25

Gavin

I lookup at the man who walked in with Ryan.I don’t know him, but he manages to pick up on what I need.He comes over and stands by Rory and I disengage myself going toward Noah Cross’s room.I look back over my shoulder and look at the woman on the floor crying.A woman who has had more pain in her life than one woman should.A woman who loves another woman’s son as if she gave birth to him herself.A good woman who deserves dreams to come true, not die.A woman who reminds me of someone else… someone I have regretted leaving for fucking years.

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