Page 24 of Ties of Starlight

And maybe she should stay that way. If he wanted to sever his heart from this situation, the less he knew the better.

He tapped his heels against his steed's flank and directed it toward the front of the group. “Let's move out!”

He looked over his shoulder one last time as Idonea took a spot at the back of the entourage. He'd been trying to sever his heart from her for a year and he'd never succeeded; how did he expect to now that she was his against her will?

Chapter 9

Idonea wasn't sure what was worse: being able to recall the memories of her past lives that she relived in her dreams or only having the haunting feelings follow her like an echo. Given the ache that followed her birthmark and the heaviness settling over her shoulders, she knew her nightmare had to have been about her last death, but she could not recall all of the specifics.

She didn't really want to anyway. She had the historical account to fill in the gaps. Those gaps were why Idonea was still going along with this. She couldn't be the reason the Star Elves kept growing weaker. She was the reason everything had fallen apart last time, so even though this was a nightmare even worse than any memory that plagued her sleep, she had to see it through.

So her unexpectedly tall horse plodded along.

But she wasn't happy about it.

This was supposed to be the last time. The last life. The one when she finally got everything right.

She said that every time.

She was tired of coming back and never quite getting it right.

Thankfully, Nyrunn rode at the front with Lord Frode and the Constella, likely ensuring he was caught up on everything he needed to know as Agnarr's chosen. Even if Idonea hadn't done this seven times before, she'd had a whole year for the Constella to ensure she understood her responsibilities in the rituals and the traditions she was expected to keep as part of her position.

So Idonea was left to her own devices for the most part. The members of the court who were traveling with them as their retinue to witness the rituals all left her alone. That was normal. Although the glares she got from a few of the guards when they thought she wasn't looking were strange.

Still, the isolation and the fact that she could ride this route with her eyes closed meant she had little to do but observe the one thing about this that wasn't already memorized with every inch of her being.

King Nyrunn.

As she watched him lead their party, it was... She had no words to describe it. He stayed away from her all day, focusing entirely on his dual roles as king and chosen. Distantly, she picked up a few flares here and there of his emotions on the other side of the wall. If she had to guess, it was probably annoyance.

Even when they stopped to make camp, most of their party already lagging and tired since they had skipped the usual Midday Rest, Nyrunn was focused on the logistics required of him and didn't look at her. Thankfully, there wasn't anything really required of them to make camp since all their stops were planned in advance; all the camp sites were set up and had servants maintaining them while they waited for the party's arrival. All they had to do wasstay on schedule and they'd hit all of them in perfect timing.

So as the sun was setting and the first few stars were emerging, they rode into the large swath of tents already put up and prepared. Before Idonea could even look around, Nyrunn was at her side and she hadn't realized when she'd lost track of him.

He was pulling her off her horse without a word, placing her on her feet before turning on his heel and responding to Lord Frode’s question with a roll of his eyes.

Then she was left staring at the space he'd been a moment before. All the times before that she'd done this, Olaug had never helped her mount or dismount.

A pang went through her chest as she watched Nyrunn direct Frode and the servants to get dinner ready and served for their camp. Straight to business.

It'd been so sterile and quiet all day, and it was awful. Olaug was always full of life, causing the guards, the court, and Idonea to laugh while they rode. Although Idonea herself was usually not involved in the conversations, she enjoyed listening to them. For the number of lives she'd lived, she was more often a spectator than a participant. It suited her well.

The court members traveling with them dismounted their steeds, handing them off to the stableboys and servants they'd brought with them tasked with the animals' care. After she'd removed her bag containing her journals and the account from Captain Bror, she waited patiently by her horse's side, just stroking its shoulder.

Lady Asa was handing off her reins when she spotted Idonea and gave her a nod, but there was a tightness to her smile. Right. Lady Asa had been hopeful that she would be selected by the king to be his bride.

Lady Katla just outright glared at Idonea.

It wasn't like she was any happier about this than they were. If King Nyrunn had feelings for Lady Asa, not only was Idonea now the half-elf he hated that he was stuck married to, but she was the reason he'd never be with the one he did love.

Which just brought her back around to the question she still had. Why would he have offered himself up?

And where was Olaug? If Nyrunn believed he'd run away—as if he would ever abandon her and his responsibilities—was he even looking for him?

More likely, he'd been kidnapped by someone who wanted to keep them weak, and if so, he wasn't safe. In this life, it seemed the Moon Elves were still their greatest threat like they’d been in her last one. If they’d kidnapped him, what if they’d killed him when they heard the wedding had still occurred?

Idonea stood there fretting until finally a stableboy approached her and she was able to hand off her horse. Once she had, she headed straight for her tent. She knew where it was, no one needed to tell her. It was always in the same place.

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