Page 27 of The Prince's Mage

“Let me start at the beginning, please. When I heard that the demon was getting married—after she took my wife from me, and not only had she gotten away with it—I failed to kill her—but now she was getting an alliance, a husband—I couldn’t stand it. After she’d taken everything from me… That’s why I came up with the scheme to kidnap her before her wedding. It was the perfect chance to take away everything she’d taken from me and get justice for Faustina. I had to—” Nikias’ voice cracked, and he swallowed. “So when you came back with a girl who looked exactly like her, sounds just like her—I’m not saying this for your pity. Just—I—All I could see was the demon killing Faustina in front of me, and all I could hear was her voice, taunting me, and I…”

Gavril steeled himself. Maybe a few weeks ago he would have been blaming himself for not noticing how unwell Nikias was. If he did now, it was only because if he’d recognized it, maybe he could have stopped Nikias before Marcella had suffered.

Nikias continued, “Of course I wanted her to suffer, as though I could convince myself I was somehow making the demon suffer instead. That it would somehow make my guilt go away. But that was just part of it. I justified it because I wanted to spare you a lifetime married to a woman who resents you and despises you no matter how much you love her.”

Gavril’s jaw clenched and he crossed his arms. “That still doesn’t change what you did to the woman you know I love. You k—almost killed her. You meant to kill her. And even so, it’s not your place. It’s my life, and I would rather Marcella be alive and safe and in it no matter how much she might resent me than have her gone.”

“Yes…” Nikias winced, keeping his gaze lowered. “I see that now, and I also see I was wrong. About the Sordes girl. About how making her pay for the demon’s crimes would be justice. I knew logically she wasn’t the demon, but in my nightmares I just saw the demon and Faustina’s blood on my hands, and my reason was nothing compared to the guilt I’ve had for—I didn’t want to see it, but now I’ve been forced to confront how hollow and empty I felt. Making the Sordes girl suffer changed nothing.”

There was something Nikias wasn’t saying. Gavril knew him well, even if he no longer considered him his brother after his betrayal. Nikias was stubborn, prideful, and as immovable as a rock. He didn’t move unless someone else moved him.

“What exactly brought about this epiphany in the last day or two? In the throne room the morning after I returned, you seemed to think making her suffer would change something,” Gavril said, narrowing his eyes.

“Look, after the girl’s heart stopped—or when I thought it had… that was when I realized nothing had changed. The demon had still gotten away with everything. But I at least still thought I’d been trying to clean up the mess I thought you were in, so I focused on that to try to absolve myself. Then I realized I was wrong about what I thought I was saving you from. A wife who hates you. When I stopped you from running away—well, it wasn’t really me who stopped you.” Nikias finally looked up again. “It was her. She told you to stay to protect your life and your magic. And then she ran out into our fight, and… there’s no doubt in my mind that girl doesn’t hate you. Far from it. Her regard for you is obvious to anyone with eyes.”

Gavril ground his teeth together even as his heart stuttered. He’d had his own quiet hopes, of course. He always had a quiet hope that could never be cut out of him that Marcella would be able to love him the way he did her. His hopes had only risen due to the same events that Nikias claimed changed his mind about her, but only a few minutes ago, when he’d tried to ascertain her heart’s standing, she’d pulled back. She’d claimed she did not remember or could not explain.

But he was absolutely not discussing this a second more with Nikias.

“And yet she still screamed at the sight of you. Because you interrogated her while a healer experimented on her. Because you ordered the healer to experiment on her until she wasdead.” Gavril shook his head. “And none of that explains this apparently profound moment of realization and growth you claim to have had about how committing such atrocities did nothing to bring any justice or ease your guilt.”

Nikias ran a hand through his hair. “I… Honestly… After you left the throne room, someone said something to me that made me realize that all I felt now was sick with myself for ruining my relationship with you. I thought the demon had taken everything from me, but I was wrong. I didn’t realize how much I still had left to lose, but this time I’m the only one to blame. I lost what little I had left for nothing because… nothing I did could bring Faustina back, and all I’d done was just make everyone else as miserable as myself. I thought—I wasn’t thinking about the future. I was too focused on the past. Ever since Faustina—despite what our parents think, I have no intentions of remarrying. I always intended on you and Aimilia ruling after me, if I even made it that long. That was the plan, and then you showed up married to a Sordes girl. And I… knew.”

There was a solemnity to his voice that sent a chill down Gavril’s spine.

“When I made the decision to go behind your back and… kill the girl, that you would kill me. I knew when I went after you to stop you from running away you would challenge me. And I knew I wasn’t going to fight back. Now… the last thing I expected was for Aimilia and the girl to intervene. For me to live… So… I’m alive. Your girl is alive, against all odds and… you weren’t the one with a mess to clean up. I was. And apparently… according to your girl, my death won’t fix this either.”

There was only one person aside from Gavril who would ever speak to Nikias so frankly and so harshly.

“Aimilia spoke to you after the throne room?” Gavril gaped at him.

Nikias huffed and crossed his arms. “I don’t know if spoke is the right word. More like, she stormed into my office and yelled at me before turning on her heel and leaving before I could get a word in edgewise.”

That sounded like her. Wait—

Gavril swore under his breath. “She told you.”

Nikias raised an eyebrow, but Gavril could see right through the aloof mask he slid on. No one could spot an illusion like Gavril. Nikias asked, “Told me what?”

Which unfortunately meant everything before had been genuine.

“You didn’t figure out I was going to escape with Marcella. Aimilia figured it out. She knows me better than you do. And she told you so you would stop me, didn’t she?”

Nikias not giving anything away was exactly what gave him away. That, and Gavril also knew Aimilia better than he did most anyone. Nikias said, “She did nothing of the sort. Every action I’ve taken has been my own. She did not ask me to do anything. Nor do I answer to her if she had.”

Gavril scoffed. “You don’t have to lie to protect her. I’m not buying it. She ratted me out to you.”

If Aimilia hadn’t opened her big mouth—

“Does it matter?” Nikias huffed, crossing his arms. “Your Sordes girl told you to stay, didn’t she? Wouldn’t she have done the same even if I hadn’t gotten in your way? You didn’t stay because I convinced you.”

Gavril would deal with Aimilia ratting him out later. Nikias was his current and biggest problem.

“Have you said everything you wanted to? Are we done here?” Gavril said, moving to turn back regardless of the answer.

Nikias started to reach forward with the arm in the sling and immediately jerked back, hissing. But he still stumbled into Gavril’s path and stopped him with his good arm. “I made a huge mistake, and I don’t want to lose you over it. You’re still my brother—”

“I don’tcarewhat you want.” Gavril shoved him back, hissing, “You arenotmy brother. Not anymore. I don’t care that you’re sorry now that you have to live with the consequences of your actions. You don’t get to die to absolve yourself. You can’t undo what you’ve done.”

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