Page 43 of Puck of the Irish

“Ok…ready…go!” Nat calls, starting the timer.

Mom draws…a blob.

“Uhh, a ball? A globe? A pond…ma! Do more! I need more!” She adds smaller blobs to the bigger blob and I shake my head. “Are you serious?”

“It’s obvious, AJ! Just look at it…” Mom taps her marker on the blobs, as if that will help me suddenly see what it’s supposed to be, and I throw up my hands.

“Ma, those are fucking blobs of nothing! This isn’t a Rorschach test, come on!” Ray and Nat burst out laughing from their couch and I flip them off, which only makes them laugh harder.

“They most certainly are not just fecking blobs. It’s not my fault you’re shit at Pictionary!”

“I’mshit?” I ask incredulously.

“Five…four…three…”

“Maaaaa,” I groan as Ray and Nat finish the countdown in unison. I collapse back into the couch behind me and pull a pillow over my face. Ray and Nat whoop and cheer and despite my competitiveness frothing at the fucking mouth in irritation, I can’t help but smile.

“It was an airplane!” mom says defensively. “How could you not see that?”

I remove the pillow and stare at her wordlessly. She stares back but then her lips curl upwards, clearly amused with herself.

“I need another drink,” I gripe and push off the couch, heading into the kitchen. I rummage in the fridge for a beer and when I straighten Nat is there, grinning, her cheeks flushed. I narrow my eyes at her.

“Are you here to gloat?”

“A bit,” she says with a cocky quirk of her brow. I can’t help but huff out a laugh. I also can’t stop myself from reaching out and wrapping a hand around her waist and tugging her towards me. She gasps quietly and I lean in, brushing my lips softly against hers. She melts into me, draping her arms over my shoulders and tunneling her fingers into my hair. I kiss her deep and slow, gently rolling my tongue against hers when she parts her lips eagerly. I pull away after a few seconds that feel like hours and smile when she speaks, a little breathless.

“What was that for?”

“For being you.”

She smiles widely and I lean in to kiss her again. I can’t seem to fucking stop. I really hope this thing with us works out because I’m not sure I can go back to being friends again now. I don’t know that I can give up kissing Natalie Morgan for the rest of my life. I’m fully aware that this puts me in a precarious position and sets me up for…heartbreak of all things. I don’t want to think too much about that now though. I’m trying very hard to just live in the moment and be grateful for every second I have. I’d told Nat not to jump into bed with me that night at Shep’s just because she was freaked out over what happened, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t affect me in that exact same way. Seeing how close the two of them had come to losing everything hit me much harder than I expected. I’ve never been unhappywith my lifestyle, or even close to ashamed of it, but now I have a feeling of…I don’t know, wasted time? Or at the very least, the need for change.

And that need for change centers directly on this beautiful woman currently wrapped in my arms.

“I think we’re going to hit the hay,” Ray calls from the living room. We pull apart and head back that direction.

“You sure, dad?”

“Yeah, airports always make me tired. Plus, gotta go to bed early so Santa can come.” He winks at Nat and she giggles. She pulls away and gives him a hug while Mom comes around the corner and wraps her arms around me.

“Do you need anything?” I’d already showed them the whole house and gotten them settled in one of the guestrooms upstairs before we’d eaten dinner and started our Pictionary war. Mom pulls back and puts a hand on my cheek, eyes sparkling with joy.

“No, sweetheart, we have everything we need. I think you just might too,” she adds with a knowing look, gently patting the pendant that she knows is below my shirt. I haven’t taken it off since she gave it to me my freshman year of college.It’ll will keep you safe, my boy. It’ll bring you the luck you deserve.

“It’s very new, mom. Like literally I’m talking fifteen minutes before you got here kind of new, so…just don’t go reading too much into everything yet.”

“Hmm,” she says with that look that says she knows I’m completely bullshitting her. Not about the newness, but about being unsure of what everything means yet. And ok, she’s right. I already know how I feel about Nat. I have for months. But I’m not ready to voice that yet and need time to wrap my head around it more,reallyunderstand it because fuck if I know how to deal with…being in love with someone. Even though I know that I love her, I still need to make sure that I can really do this whole relationship thing and not fuck things up before Igo dropping L bombs all over the place. I know for a fact from listening to Nat talk about her parents that two people can love each other so damn passionately and still not be together.

Mom pulls away and wraps Nat in a hug, and I don’t miss the way Nat seems to break a little, squeezing mom tightly and closing her eyes. I know she’s missing her own mom so badly in this moment and I wish there was something I could do. Mom seems to understand without having any reason to—it’s not like she has any idea that Nat lost her own mother just before Christmas last year—just one of those magical mom superpowers I guess, and she holds Nat a little tighter, stroking her hair.

Ray slaps me on the back and I grin. He may not have been the one to bring me into this world, but he’s the one who taught me how to be a man in it, and for that I will be forever grateful.

“She’s a keeper, son. Hell, I think I might like her better than I like you.” He winks at me and I laugh.

“I can’t blame you there, dad. Not one damn bit.” He smiles and squeezes my shoulder once before stepping away to join mom where she’s finally let Nat go. She still holds one of Nat’s hands though and reaches out to gently cup her jaw in that mom way of hers and I swear the gesture heals a bit of Nat’s broken heart.

“We’ll see you two kids in the morning,” mom says, dropping her hands, and my parents head up the stairs. When they’re gone, I lean back against the counter and pull Nat to me again, settling her between my legs and resting my hands on her hips.

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