Page 68 of Bound to the Shadow Prince

“It is not that simple.” His eyes flicker. “I cannot compromise who I am, and a mate is everything to a Fellian. A female brings honor to her mate, and I would not dishonor you.”

“You weren’t thinking about honor when my mouth was on your knot,” I grumble.

“You woke me by surprise. No male would turn away such a thing.” A long claw strokes along the curve of my jaw. “I am a strong male, but not that strong, Candra.”

“So you didn’t like it.”

“No, that’s not the problem. I liked it too much.” His voice is achingly gentle. “I likeyoutoo much. I am just trying to love you and honor you in the best way I know how.”

I go still in surprise. “You…love me?”

“You sound surprised. Have I not made my affection for you clear?”

Has he? It’s hard to say. He’s kissed me and we’ve fooled around, but I didn’t realize love was a factor. Or am I so used to court morals and flirting that it all seems normal to me?“I mean…it could be clearer.”

“I asked you to be my mate,” Nemeth says gently. “I do not offer such things lightly. If I took a human female as my mate, I would be mocked before my people. They would not shun me, but they would make their displeasure very evident, and it would take many long years for my family name to return to honor. I know my brothers would be disgusted with me, my mother disappointed. I know all this and yet I still make this offer to you, because a life without you seems far more unbearable.” His thumb pad skims over my lower lip. “Would I take myself in hand all through the night if I did not care for you?”

“All through the night, huh?” How did I sleep through this?

He gives a wry chuckle and skims my lip again. “Being near you and not being able to touch you? It is maddening. But I would respect you. My people think so little of Liosians that Iwould have no one think I did not treat you with the utmost honor in our time here. Please do not be angry with me.”

“Well…I can’t be angry now,” I say, mollified. I feel better knowing that despite his serene facade, he’s desperate with wanting me.

Claws move to my chin and he tips it up, making me meet his eyes in the darkness. “Then say you will be my mate.”

I swallow hard. If I say yes, I get what I want here—him and me, together. But once we leave this tower, I’ll be a pariah. Not just in my kingdom, but it sounds like in his, too. There will be no place for us to be happy together. “I don’t know, Nemeth.”

“I understand.” He leans in and presses a kiss to my brow. “Take all the time you need. We have years.”

Instead of reassuring me, that just makes me feel worse. Do I waste our time together worrying about the future? Or do I forget about the future and live for now?

This time, when we lie down to sleep, Nemeth pulls me against him. He doesn’t kiss me again, but tugs me against his chest and holds me close. If I was a strong, indignant woman, I’d say that him holding me is a little manipulative. That he’s trying to pull me to his way of thinking.

But I’m lonely and needy and his arms around me feel far, far too good. I guess he’s not the only one that’s weak.

Chapter

Forty-One

“Candra.” Nemeth’s voice is hushed against my ear, rousing me from sleep. A moment later, he shakes me gently. “Candra, wake up.”

“Mm?” I rub my nose against his chest, drowsy and content. “Is it morning?”

“I do not know. But I hear something.”

The urgency in his voice makes my sleepiness fade. I pull out of his arms and sit upright, ears straining. He’s right—I hear the faint but familiarchink chink chinkof bricks being broken outside. “Someone’s back?”

“It seems so.” He sounds uneasy.

I slide out of bed and reach for the lamp, tapping it to turn it on.“Do you suppose they forgot to give us something?”

“They forgot to give you wood to burn last year and they never came to give you more.” Nemeth points out, hauling his big body out of bed.

Frowning, I pause. He’s right. Riza’s letters were full of apologies about how guilty she’d felt once they’d realized the mistake. How she’d been anxious all year at the thought of me fending for myself without a basic necessity. Yet no one hadthought to re-open the tower and provide me with the forgotten wood. So why return now? It’s past the solstice. The goddess’s eye will be heavily upon us, watching to make sure we don’t venture anywhere near the door and break our vow.

“Then what can it be?” I ask Nemeth, even as I slip my shoes on. “Is it your people, perhaps?”

“It will not be,” he says to me. “I would know if they planned to return.”

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