Page 62 of One Short Summer

“What’s wrong then?” He pulls me up higher on his lap, rubbing my back in gentle circles.

“The phone call. It was my ex.” Gabe stiffens at my words, but I’m trying to get it all out as fast as possible. “He told me the dance company wants me back, and that they will offer me a solo too. It’s been my biggest dream, and I’ve worked so hard for it my whole life. But then he said something about our past, and it brought up all those memories, and now I’m a mess, snotting all over you, but I...I can’t stop crying.”

“Shhh. It’s okay.” He pauses. “I didn’t realize you work with your ex. What did he say?” Gabe’s words have more of a bite to it than before.

“Nothing bad. He actually apologized for his behavior.”

The words keep tumbling out of my mouth even though I didn’t plan on telling Gabe about it. Something about him, and us, has changed though. Our friendship is built on trust and honesty, and I value both so much. Maybe it’s because he opened up about his ex earlier?

“You’re not the only one with a shitty ex. I actually have several of those.”

He coughs as if he choked on something.

“Sorry.” I slowly pull back, looking at his face.

“Don’t be. It’s okay. I guess it’s officially shitty-ex day.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Do you want to tell your story now?”

Do I want to? Not really.

But I will anyway. He made himself vulnerable earlier, and I’m going to return the favor. Even if it’s embarrassing to tell.

“I’ll tell you the short version. Not sure we’d make it through the long one.”

“Whatever you want to share, I’m here for you.” He gives my back a little squeeze. “Just like you were there for me.”

I pucker my lips and let out a steadying breath of air. “Ivan and I had been dating for almost a year when I found out I was pregnant.”

Gabe flinches, but I continue, focusing on the sleeve of my shirt.

“Ivan was ecstatic. Everyone thought we were a dream couple, and he’d always wanted kids. Since he’s several years older, he thought it was perfect timing. I, on the other hand, had just gotten the biggest shock of my entire life but plastered on my happy smile anyway, since I didn’t know how else to handle the situation. I tried at least, despite being completely overwhelmed, not to mention stunned. My whole career disappeared in front of my eyes, just like that. Poof. In two seconds. Gone.”

The emotions swirl in my body. So much anger, frustration, and sadness surrounding this event. “I miscarried only a week later.”

“Monica.”

“Ivan accused me of being happy about it, that maybe I did something on purpose to lose the baby. I could see the hatred in his eyes, the absolute disgust for me and what he thought I did. Needless to say, that was the end of our relationship. He delivered one more punch as we parted, telling me he was actually relieved I lost the baby because I’m an emotionless robot, incapable of loving anything or anyone other than myself and my career, that I probably would’ve turned out to be an awful mother anyway.”

This wasn’t the first time someone had mentioned my incapability of loving anything other than dancing.

The emotions in my chest pile up so high, I barely get the last words out before I completely break down, the sobs shaking me so violently I’m afraid they might never stop.

Gabe is there for every second of its ugliness. Whispering soothing words in my ear. Caressing my back like there’s nothing else he’d rather do, nowhere else he’d rather be. Most importantly, he doesn’t let go of me, allowing me to break apart on the inside while he’s holding me together from the outside.

Cleaning my face as best as I can without an actual tissue, I pull back and stare straight into his eyes. “Take me upstairs to bed.”

“Monica, I—”

The fight is visible in his eyes as I swallow loudly. “Please, Gabe. I just need to forget about all of this. Because despite what Ivan said, I didcare, and I didmourn. I was hurt so badly that I locked myself into the bathroom whenever I could, just so I could let go of it all in peace, without people watching and judging me.”

“Don’t. I don’t want you to believe a thing he said. You’renothinglike that. Do you hear me? Absolutely nothing, and I really hope you know that. And I’ll try my hardest to prove it to you. You’reeverythinghe didn’t see, and it’s his loss he missed out on this wonderful person you are.”

I smash my lips against his.

No one has ever said anything this nice to me before. Not even close.

All I’ve ever heard from guys were sentiments close to what Ivan told me.

I know they weren’t all true, but some of them were. I’ve always had big dreams and was nothing but focused.

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