He shrugs his shoulders, as he starts playing with my fingers. “Yes and no. I do miss my bandmates and playing with them, but I don’t miss all the stress surrounding it. Plus, I’ve been really enjoying being here too—with you.” With a sparkle in his eyes, he leans down to kiss me.

His lips are very loving, soft and sweet against mine, and my heart responds immediately. My heartbeat increases, and it distracts me so much that it pulls me out of the moment, my thoughts going back to my conversations with Monica and Hannah.

“Everything okay?” His eyebrows furrow as he looks at me with concerned eyes.

“Hudson, we need...I think we need to talk.”

He nods. “Good. Because I wanted to talk to you too.”

Chapter Thirty-Five

Why on earthdid I agree to have our talk in the bedroom? I’ve clearly lost my mind because that just screamsbad ideafrom miles away. Looking everywhere in the spacious bedroom except at Hudson, I continuously wipe my hands on my pants. My stomach is tied up in knots, cramping, and making me feel nauseous.

Please, don’t let me get sick.That’s definitely the absolute last thing I need right now.

Hudson pats the spot next to him on the couch. “Come over here and sit down with me, please. You’re starting to make me all nervous.”

After taking a deep breath, I walk over to him, my thoughts still going in one big dizzying loop.

Do I really want to have this talk with him? Maybe we can just keep going like we have been. It seems to have worked pretty well so far.

And what on earth doeshewant to talk to me about?

Maybe he wants to end things, while I’m contemplating taking the next step.

“Charlie.” Hudson’s voice is low, and I realize I stopped walking toward him. Instead, I’ve been pacing back and forth in the middle of the room, probably making him think I’ve really lost my marbles.

Getting up from the couch, he walks over to me, his steps slow and cautious. The look on his face reminds me of a person approaching a scared or injured animal, something that looks ready to run at any moment.

Well, thatdoessound kind of appropriate, I suppose.

“What has you so upset?” He’s a few feet away from me, apparently planning on giving me some space, and eyeing me warily while scratching his chin. “Did something happen? Are you not feeling well?”

Closing my eyes for a moment, I take a deep breath. Right then and there, I decide to do something that is completely out of character for me, but it just feels right. I might possibly regret it in about two seconds, but I’m not going to beat around the bush.

Full-on honesty, no holding back.

“Mo asked me if I’m in love with you.”

Well, how’s that for directness?

A quiet “Oh” is all I hear from him before there’s only silence again—just absolute, soul-piercing, heart-wrenching silence.

In fact, it’s so quiet, I’m sure I could hear a feather fall to the ground. I look down at the floor, absentmindedly tracing an imaginary pattern on the rug with my foot. I can’t look at him, my brain contemplating if it might be best to just leave and sleep in my room for the night.

My breath hitches when his feet appear in my line of vision, stopping right in front of my own—toes to toes.

His fingers move under my chin, gently pushing it up until my eyes meet his beautiful brown ones. “Hey.” He brushes a few strands of hair out of my face and gently caresses my cheek. “Why does that have you so tied up in knots?”

Grabbing my hand, he leads me over to the couch, not leaving any room between us when we sit down. “Please look at me.” His voice is soft yet commanding, making me peer up at him. “I think you know by now that I’m pretty straightforward and honest, right? I just don’t see the point in holding back.”

I nod because he’s right, that’s all he’s ever been since we met.

He runs his hand through his hair before looking at the ceiling for a moment, blowing out a big breath. “Man, this is harder than I thought it was going to be.”

Well,that’scertainly not helping with my nerves.

He’s totally going to say this was fun, but he’s not looking for anything more, isn’t he? I should have walked away earlier when I still had the chance.