Page 34 of Black Lace

"I think I need to sit down," she says, her eyes like saucers. "How? When? Where? Why?"

You forgot 'what,'" I tease her. "I think you know how. When would be over the weekend. Where wouldbe at the Hamptons. Why is a bit trickier." I sigh and I have to look away from her, not wanting to see her reaction when I tell her, "I'm in love with her. That's why."

There’s silence in the room as I make my confession. Daisy doesn’t say anything until I turn to look at her.

“Does Tiff know?” She raises an eyebrow at me, and I laugh.

“She does now. She didn’t a few days ago.”

“Aha! I knew it.” She gives me a shrewd look. “How long have you been in love with her?”

I give her another sheepish grin. “Forever, probably.”

“Daaaaaamn. This is going to cause a total shitstorm since she only just broke up with Ben.”

Butterflies tumble around in my stomach as I remember that Tiff is currently talking to Ben. Despite my confidence that what we have is perfect, I can’t help but have that returning fear that for some reason she’ll get back with him today.

“Yeah, especially since she kicked me out of her apartment when we got back so that she could talk privately with him.” I cringe at the memory.

Daisy’s expression changes into a deep frown. “What the fuck?! That’s pretty shitty.”

“Oh, damn. That came out wrong,” I quickly backtrack. “In Tiff’s defense, we were kissing as we entered her apartment and he was there waiting for her. He was a total asshole about it and accused her of cheating withme. I just about smashed his smug face in,” I growl, wishing that I had.

Daisy walks across the room and drops into an armchair nearby. “Is this a good idea, Dec? I don’t want you to get hurt. They’ve been together for so long and this is really sudden.”

I can hear the unasked question in her words and I wish that I had absolute certainty that there was no chance Tiffany Carter won’t stomp all over my heart today. It feels as though if we can make it through today then all days in the future aren’t in question.

“If she gets back together with him, there’s nothing I can do about it. She’s a grown woman and it’s her choice who she wants to be with.”

My heart hurts as I consider a future where Tiff gets back with Ben. It was hard enough being around them over the last ten years, I can’t even imagine what it would be like now that I know what it’s like to have Tiffany Carter panting and wet beneath me.

“Are you in love with her or not? Because that doesn’t sound like you’re very sure,” Daisy says, her concern showing in both her expression and her tone of voice.

I give her a level gaze and tell her truthfully, “I love Tiffany so much that I would not be with her if that was what she wanted. All I care about is her happiness.”

“What about your happiness, Declan?” Daisy asks in a quiet voice.

I sigh as I consider the question. I know that in this particular situation my heart would be absolute mincemeat and I’m not sure that I could actually survive it.

“I have to hope that Tiffany is the one who cares about that.”

“I’ll kill her.” Daisy repeats my sentiment about Ben from Saturday, and I smile at her, my heart swelling with love for my overprotective little sister.

“You won’t, but I love you for thinking that you would.”

We sit in silence for a minute and I stare out the window at the city below us considering my current relationship status.

“Look. As far as I’m aware, Tiffany and I are together. I don’t have any reason to believe that isn’t the case unless she says otherwise. I would marry her today if she said yes.”

“Well, congratulations, I guess. Does Jazz know?”

I shrug and look back at her again. “I’m not sure. Can you keep this to yourself for now?”

“Of course. Just let me know when I can spill the tea.”

We talk for a little while longer, but I constantly look over at my phone on the coffee table nearby where it lays traitorously silent.

We’re just discussing the email I received earlier from our accountant when my phone rings and the name ‘Tiffany Carter’ is displayed on the screen.

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