Page 31 of Sebastian's Baby

She blinks at me a couple of times, then turns quickly and leaves my hotel suite. I feel strangely unfulfilled. Lita’s words about sex without love being ‘glorified masturbation’ come to my mind, and I grit my teeth. I don’t know why I keep thinking about that woman, but I wish I wouldn’t.

I’ve been doing just fine with ‘glorified masturbation’ for well over a decade. I came up with my personal rule to make it even more clear-cut when I had so many women to choose from that I could never possibly sleep with them all. Sex has always been fun and enjoyable, and my rule meant that I never got attached. The only relationships I want are the ones I have with my friends and family.

So why does an experience like tonight’s suddenly feel meaningless and hollow?

7

LEVEL 7.1 – Sleep with A Groupie

It’s Monday morning,and I’m eating a late breakfast of toast and juice. I was up late at Hayden’s last night playing music in his rehearsal room. It was a good night, but I’m on edge this morning because we’re waiting for the results of the trial. The closing arguments were late on Friday, and the jury was sequestered over the weekend to reconvene this morning.

My phone lights up, and Cooper’s name is on the screen. My heart races in my chest because this ismuchearlier than I was expecting to hear from him.

“Have they already decided?” I answer the phone.

At the same time, Cooper says, “Why would someone named Lolita Ciccone be calling Stephanie daily and begging to get in contact with you, Sebastian?”

My blood turns to ice in my veins, and my stomach drops. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Stephanie tells me that she’s one of those competition winners from last month. Apparently, she said to tell you it was ‘I want to be the one to tell him kind of important.’”

I don’t think I can breathe as I take this in. I’m actually speechless. Unable to form any words, and my brain is just throwing the word ‘no’ at me over and over.

“So I called her myself to find out what was so very important and what do you think she told me?”

I swallow heavily and say, “I don’t know.”

I brace myself for the words I’m expecting him to say, but he doesn’t say them.

“She told me that she didn’t want to discuss it with me and to simply tell you that she called and thatyouwould know what she was calling about.”

I can’t help but smile because it will always be amusing to me to hear about Cooper being put in his place.

“So what is she calling about, Sebastian?”

I grimace because I’m about ninety-nine percent sure I know what she’s calling about, but I tell him, “It’s hard to say. I won’t know for sure unless I speak to her, I guess.”

“Don’t be coy with me. Did you get that girl pregnant, Sebastian? You need to keep your fucking dick in your pants.”

I’m instantly reminded of Lita heavily implying that I’m unable to keep my dick in my pants when she was here in Chicago. Maybe it’s the stress of the trial, the knowledge that I’ve probably fucked up my entire life for one night of fun, or just the complete insanity of the situation, but I burst into laughter.

Cooper explodes, and I’ve never heard him lose his cool like this before. “It’s not fucking funny, you little shit. You’ve been fucking anything that moves for years, and apparently, you’re now going to suffer the consequences of that.”

I laugh harder because Cooper being pissed about it when it’s not even really his problem is funny, too.

“For fuck’s sake, Sebastian. This is ridiculous. I’ll send you her number. Call me as soon as she gives you whatever news she has to give you.”

“Sure, Coop. Sounds like fun,” I manage to say before he hangs up.

I drop my phone on the table in front of me and try to get my laughter under control.

I guess I can assume that I’m going to be a dad.

My laughter dies immediately at this thought. Shit. No way. Lita probably just really enjoyed our time together and is trying to get a hold of me so that we can fuck again. My brain helpfully throws up an image of her disappointed face when I told her to go shower, and I doubt that I’m right.

My phone lights up, and Lita’s name and phone number are displayed on the screen. I swallow heavily and let the screen go blank. I finish eating my toast and juice, which are both completely tasteless, then take the dishes and drop them in the kitchen sink.

Finally, I have no reason left to delay this, so I take my phone to the sofa and sit down. Is this where I want to get this news? I stand up and walk over to my pool table instead, tracing part of the Cruise Control logo as I dial Lita, and the phone rings in my ear.

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