Page 46 of The Stalker

“If you’re ready for bed, then so am I,” she told him.

Her brain helpfully threw up an image of her lying in a bed with Hayden, and heat rushed to her cheeks.

For crying out loud, you heard him having sex with his boyfriend mere hours ago, woman!

Tatiana quickly stood and turned to set Live and Let Die down on the table so she could hide her burning face from Hayden’s view.

“Would you like a coffee before bed?” he asked, and she nodded.

Hayden often made them both a coffee before bed, and they sat on the sofa together to drink it while talking. He had ordered brown sugar the next time he’d ordered groceries and made her coffee with her preferred sweetener these days.

“I got an email telling me that the tour bus is ready for me to inspect. I was beginning to worry they wouldn’t get the modifications done in time, to be honest,” Hayden told her.

The tour was starting in a few days, so they were definitely cutting it fine with getting Hayden’s bus ready. Tatiana hadn’t been involved in the process of organizing it, as that didn’t really affect her. She would need to inspect it before they left, though.

“That must be a relief,” she told him.

“It really is,” he smiled at her. “I’m excited to be on tour again, though. Performing for thousands of people is amazing. There’s no feeling like it.”

His face got a faraway look as he mentioned it, and Tatiana wondered what that must be like. For her, it was the most terrifying aspect of this contract. Hayden would be so exposed when on stage. She dreaded those hours already. But she didn’t want to stress Hayden, so she smiled back at him.

“I can’t even imagine what that’s like.”

“We give everything to our music and our concerts, and the fans give it back to us. The energy in these arenas is phenomenal, and when you have an entire audience singing every word to a song you wrote.” He shook his head. “Mind-blowing.”

His whole face had lit up as he talked about it, and Tatiana was entranced by watching him. He was incredibly beautiful, and even more so when talking about music, which he was clearly passionate about.

Drink your coffee and get the hell out of Dodge.

She finished off her coffee and forced herself to stop thinking about how attractive Hayden was as she did. He took their mugs and rinsed them in the sink before putting them in the dishwasher, then she escorted him to his room.

As soon as she heard the locks click shut, she entered her room. Tatiana stripped off her clothes and bra, but left her underwear on and pulled on a nightgown. She turned off the light and slipped into bed.

She lay in the dark, thinking about her evening with Hayden. She needed to be more careful with the things she told him. There was something about him that made her want to be open with him.

You’ve got a fucking crush on him, moron.

Okay, so she thought he was hot and sweet and that he definitely deserved a better partner than Blake Stirling, but she couldn’t have a crush on him. He was her client, and his safety relied on her having complete focus at all times. Plus, he had a boyfriend. One she’d heard him having sex with tonight.

On cue, her brain supplied a memory of Hayden moaning in ecstasy.

Gee, thanks, brain. Tatiana, ignore that.

But she couldn’t. Her brain played it on repeat for her, adding to it the images she’d had earlier of herself on her knees in front of him. Tatiana slipped her hand into her underwear and began rubbing her clit. She was already soaking wet, and she realized she’d been wet all evening, probably from the moment she first heard Hayden’s moans, and had simply been ignoring her physical arousal.

She gave in to her wicked desires and imagined herself entering his room right now. She pictured Hayden in bed, and the way he would smile seductively at her before inviting her to join him.

Tatiana moaned as she imagined climbing on top of him and easing herself onto him. She was aching intensely for him to fill her and thought about how good he would feel inside her. She wondered what he was like as a kisser, with those big soft lips of his.

She stroked herself faster, moaning again several times before her orgasm overtook her and she was left panting heavily as waves of ecstasy washed over her while her body shook. Finally, the world stopped glowing, and she was left with nothing but the guilt of masturbating over a man who was strictly off-limits.

-

My love,

Time is meaningless because I’m not with you. It feels as though my entire life has been leading up to the point when we can be together. These moments, as I wait impatiently for that time to arrive, will be a blip in the ocean of the rest of our life together, but for now, they seem endless.

I am sure that some days will never end. That time will stretch on in this meaningless void, and we will never be together. Those days are hard, my love. So hard. I will admit that I allow myself to dwell on how difficult this time is for me. I am sorry that I am not stronger in my commitment to you on those days.

Please know that I am trying to be better for you. To make up for those days by focusing on what needs to be done for us to be together. I hope that you’re reading these emails and dreaming of our life together as I’m dreaming of our life together.

I love you always forever.

XOXO

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