Page 116 of Harrison's Wedding

I’m singing “Cataclysm,” a song from our second album, when Gabriel and Hayden walk into the room with smiles on their faces. Gabriel immediately joins me in singing, and I stop as he takes the lead. Hayden walks over to his drums and picks up the beat while Gabriel goes to play the piano.

When we finish the song, he turns on his stool to grin at me. “That was good. It feels like we haven’t played together in forever.”

“Yeah, it’s been a while. Hi, by the way,” I greet him.

“Oh, hey. How are you doing?” His smile slips from his face.

For a second, my worries come back before I push them away. I’m tired of being sad, and it’s so much harder for my concerns to reach me when I’m in this room. It’s as though the room is worry-proofed as much as it is soundproofed.

“Okay, I guess. Did Hayden invite you out tonight?” I ask him.

“He did. Ariana’s at work, but she’s going to meet us for dinner.”

He gets a soft smile and a faraway look on his face at the mention of her. I’m surprised to feel a stab of envy for an instant before it, too, melts away quickly. I’m glad he’s happy.

“That’s awesome. Well, in the meantime, let’s play ‘Rules to Break,’” I suggest.

The guys nod, and we launch into the song together. It’s odd playing as a trio, and I wish Sebastian were here with us. Still, we make it work, and end up playing through most of our songs before we take a break.

We’re all breathing heavily and dripping sweat when we finish up before packing the instruments away and leaving the room.

“Fuck, that was good,” Gabriel announces.

“Definitely,” Hayden agrees.

I drink what feels like a full gallon of water before I head to my bedroom to shower and wash away the sweat. Now that I’m out of the music room, I feel the dull ache return to me that accompanies my daily life these days. The ring box is sitting on the bedside table and I open it to look at Heather’s ring. I miss her so much.

I sigh heavily, then head to the bathroom to shower and change into fresh clothes, feeling much better once I do. I find the other guys in the living room, sitting on the sofa and talking. Gabriel is wearing jeans, and a t-shirt that I recognize as Hayden’s.

We all hang out together until it’s time to leave for my appointment with the jeweler. I head to my room and carefully put the ring box in my pocket, terrified that I might somehow lose it on this outing.

“We’re coming with you,” Gabriel announces when I come back out.

“Really? Why?” I ask.

He and Hayden exchange glances before he says, “It’s stupid for us to go in separate cars when we’re all going to the same club tonight. This way, we can all go back to my place to pick up Ariana before dinner without running all over Chicago.”

“Sure,” I agree, and see my two friends exchange glances again.

I wonder what they talked about while I was out of the room, but I struggle to find the energy to care. If this is because they think I need some kind of babysitter, well, it’s not like Hayden hasn’t made it clear that he thinks I need that anyway.

We head downstairs to the underground garage. We load into the back of one of the SUVs with Michael and Jesse, while Ethan takes one back to Gabriel’s place. I give Michael the address of the jeweler, and we arrive just before the appointment. As we approach the doors, one of the security guards glances at us, then swipes a card to allow us entry into the building.

Once we’re inside, a brunette woman rushes over to us with a bright smile on her face. “Mr. Fletcher, it’s lovely to see you again.”

Her eyes flicker to Gabriel and Hayden, and the telltale signs of a fan getting starstruck are obvious to me. I met her when I bought Heather’s ring, but people always have more of a reaction when there’s more than one of us. Gabriel, in particular, is most people’s favorite band member, so I’m unsurprised when she keeps glancing at him.

“Follow me, please,” she instructs in a slightly squeaky voice.

There are two women seated together at one desk on the other side of the room, and a couple at another desk to our right. Both groups of people stare at us as we head over to one of the other desks. The two women are seated nearby, and I can hear them whispering to each other as they continue to goggle at us.

I’m uncomfortable with the people looking at us, I’m sure they’re talking about me cheating on Heather, and I realize that Sebastian isn’t with us today. I think they’ll take this as confirmation that there’s some rift between us, and I cringe internally.

The assistant swiftly grabs an extra chair for Gabriel to sit in and he smiles at her as he says, “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome,” she responds in a breathy voice. She blinks at us for a few seconds, then looks at me and says, “I’ll just go get the jeweler for you, Mr. Fletcher.”

She walks away, and I’m on edge because the two women are still whispering. I think I can hear the couple behind us talking to each other, as well. Every time I’m in public, I’m sure that people are thinking about what I did. I can’t relax until I’ve had a few drinks, then the alcohol kicks in and I’m able to ignore their looks as well as the world around me.

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