Page 66 of Gabriel's Album

“I hear what you’re saying”—I pause for a second to compose myself because it feels as though my heart might be bleeding in my chest—“and those are all very valid points, but I have a question for you. What if we don’t break up?”

Ariana’s eyes widen and her mouth drops slightly open as she stares back at me.

“I’m not sure. I hadn’t really thought about it,” she tells me, and this time I’m sure my heart is bleeding because hearing her say that fucking hurts like hell.

“Well, I have,” I say in a dead voice. “At what point in our relationship will you give in, Ari? How many years would we need to be together before you would feel comfortable telling the world about us? I can see how it tears you up seeing women flirting with me, and I don’t want to hurt you like that, but there’s nothing I can say to stop them without looking like a total asshole.

“I’m at a loss as to how I can possibly show you that I will never hurt you if I can help it. What can I do to show you that I really love you and want to be with you? Because you say that you know I do, but you act like you think that giving you my love means nothing, and it’s driving me insane.”

I don’t know what else I can say to explain it to her. There’s nothing that I want more in the world than her. It feels as though, even though we’re together, we’re really not. I have her sometimes, then other times she’s on the other side of that wall, and I can’t get to her, no matter how hard I try.

“I’m not sure what to say,” Ariana says quietly.

“Say something, Ari. Just say something, anything,” I beg her.

“It’s not something I can change overnight, Gabe. It’s my own issues that are causing me to be unable to imagine a future with you. I can’t even fathom it. I know I won’t be ready to tell the world about us anytime soon, but I hope that it’s enough for you that I want to.

“I want to be with you, and I hate that sometimes I give you the impression that I don’t want to be with you because I do. More than anything, I want to be with you. I know it’s not exactly what you want to hear, but I hope it’s enough.”

Ariana opens her arms, inviting me to close the gap between us. I move forward slowly to position myself just in front of Ariana. I’m on my knees in front of her, our eyes level. My heart pounds in my chest as I raise my hands to cup her face while looking into her eyes.

The air around us is thick with tension as I say, “I love you, Ariana Chamberlain. Remember that.”

I bring my lips to hers, kissing her softly before she says, “I love you too, Gabriel Knight. I always will.”

I will never get tired of hearing those words from her. I know she loves me, but I need to hear it because of the wall between us. Today, it feels like we’ve removed a few bricks.

Ariana reaches forward and pulls my head back to hers to kiss me again. She pulls me down on top of her as she leans back into the beanbag. I can feel her soft body underneath me as we make out.

Her kisses help me to forget the problems in our relationship, and I focus on the here and now, on the thing between us that will always be good. The fear that our relationship can’t possibly last the way it’s going gets pushed away, at least for now.

We make short work of removing each other’s clothes, and she lays back against the beanbag. I kiss her and reach down to stroke her clit. She pants as I rub her quickly back and forth and begin twisting her nipple with my other hand. She reaches between us to begin stroking my cock in return.

“Oh, Ari. You’re so fucking sexy,” I groan as I watch her writhe beneath me.

I feel satisfied as she moans loudly when she comes for me. I kiss her again and position myself over her before pressing into her. I fuck her with intense desperation, wanting her to forget that I’m a rock star and to see me as ‘just Gabe,’ the boyfriend who loves her with every part of his heart and soul.

I feel her orgasm hit her, and I find mine shortly after. I lie with my head cradled on her naked breasts. We’re both panting for breath as we lie there. Suddenly, all of my emotions hit me at once, and I begin to cry.

I love her more than I’ve ever loved anyone else, but according to her, there’s nothing I can do to fix our relationship. I don’t want our relationship to end, but it feels like it will. It feels like she’s never going to get past this thing, this inner voice that tells her she’s not good enough for me, and that I’m going to cheat on her.

The pain in my chest is intense as shit when I think about her leaving me one day. My tears roll down her body while I cling to her for support, and she begins to cry as well, her body silently shaking along with mine.

We lie together, crying for a long time, naked and sweaty from making love. Finally, I turn my gaze to hers, and without a word, I kiss her again. I trace the path of her tears with my lips down to where they intermingle with mine and continue down her body. I stop between her thighs, and Ariana groans when I begin to kiss and lick her pussy. She continues to cry even while I bring her to orgasm yet again.

I come back up to lie next to her, tasting her salty tears as we kiss. I lie next to her, stroking her hair and murmuring words of comfort until she eventually stops crying. I gather up our clothes and pass Ariana her underwear, top, and skirt. I begin to get dressed as she puts on her clothing.

Once we’ve got our clothes on, I sit on the floor and pull her into my lap. I wrap my arms around her, holding her tight in my arms. The fear that this will end one day hits me with a powerful force, and I squeeze her to make sure she’s real.

“You are so beautiful,” I whisper.

“Thank you,” Ariana says in a croaky voice.

“I love you.” I kiss her head and turn my wrist so that I can look at my watch. “We should probably get out of here, though. People are going to start setting up for the concert soon.”

Ariana nods her agreement and follows me out of the area the same way we came in. When we reach the exit near the steps, I pull her to me in a hug and then take her hand and begin leading her toward my dressing room. Just as we walk into the corridor, Cooper walks toward us from the other direction.

“There you are,” he says, glaring at us.

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