Page 29 of Gabriel's Album

“I’ll try not to let you down.”

“As if you could. You’re going to rock.”

Cooper arrives, and Ariana stands next to me as a circle forms with everyone backstage. Cooper gives a speech about how we’re going to have an amazing night tonight and for everyone to keep their energy levels high. Starlight Galaxy comes off stage, and I high five Alistair when he passes me.

The roadies are spurred into action. They start bringing the Starlight Galaxy equipment off the stage and replacing it with the items for our set. While they’re doing it, I start doing my vocal exercises, and I’m pleased that my voice feels good tonight.

I try and keep my nerves in check as I finish up my exercises. Hayden is tapping one of the benches with his drumsticks, and Sebastian and Harrison both recheck their already perfectly tuned guitars before the roadies take them onstage. We get the all-clear to go onstage, and I nod.

“You ready, guys?” I ask them.

“Sure, let’s fucking do this.” Sebastian grins at me and starts up the stairs to the stage, taking them two at a time.

I laugh and follow him up the stairs. Hayden and Harrison are behind me. We take our positions in the darkness of the stage. I’m standing in front of my microphone, and this is the part when I’m nervous as shit. I’m always terrified that the sound guys will fuck up and the mic will catch me saying something dumb to the other guys.

Then, when it goes live, a tiny part of my brain panics that I’m going to say something stupid without thinking. This isn’t new; it’s something I’ve dealt with for years. It’s like when you’re walking across a bridge and you’re worried you’ll climb over and fall. You don’t want to do it, but your brain tells you that you could anyway.

It’s that. But with forty thousand people watching you. The main arena’s lights go down, and the entire crowd screams in unison. Once the crowd is able to see us, the screaming gets even more intense. Our earplugs protect our hearing and help us to be able to hear the music. Before the screaming finishes, Sebastian plays a single chord on his guitar, and the sound of it reverberates throughout the arena.

As we launch into the first song for the evening, my nerves dissipate. I’m completely at home as soon as we’re performing. Fuck ups will happen; they always do. We laugh them off or acknowledge them to the crowd. It’s never as bad as what I imagine in the moments before a show starts.

I’m aware that I’m performing to the next level tonight, and I know that it’s because Ariana is watching me. I can see her and Heather standing in the Pit right in front of center stage as photographers move around the area, taking pictures of us. Every now and again, I catch Ariana’s gaze, and she gives me the most brilliant smiles when our eyes meet.

We’re halfway through “Midnight Rebellion” when I notice Ariana and Heather spin around so their backs are to the stage and they’re facing the audience. I glance over at Harrison, who has noticed as well and is looking concerned.

Security guards are hauling fans over the barrier. I can see the fans attempting to hit and kick each other, and they’re yelling. I can’t hear what they’re saying, but I’m sure it’s not pleasant from the looks on their faces. I’m singing the second verse, and I trail off mid-lyric. The guys taper off their playing, too, with Hayden stopping last because he’s at the back and probably can’t see everything that we can see.

“Please, calm down,” I urge the crowd. “We don’t want anyone to get hurt.”

I’m also really worried that Ariana will get hurt. She and Heather have their backs to us as they watch what’s going on, so I can’t see her face.

“We’re also not impressed by any fan who harms another fan,” Sebastian adds to my comment.

“We just want you all to have a good time; there’s plenty of us to go around!” I give a bright smile to the entire audience, and I’m relieved to see the rest of the front-row section seem fine now that the troublemakers are gone. “Now, where were we?”

We pick up the song at the start of the second verse, and the crowd cheers. Ariana and Heather turn to stand back where they originally were, and I smile at her, relieved that she’s safe.

Our next song is “If I Were You,” which is a ballad Harrison wrote about Heather. I sing it to Ariana tonight, though, making my way to the middle of the stage, and I lock eyes with her as often as I can allow so that she knows I mean these words for her.

I see Heather lean over to Ariana and say something to her, then they both start laughing. I’m confused and make a note to ask her what was so funny later. Here I am, trying to be her romantic boyfriend, and she’s too busy giggling to be wooed by my gesture.

Ariana catches my gaze again and stops laughing at once, just beaming at me as I sing to her. I give up on looking around the crowd and sing to her for the rest of the song. The rest of the concert passes without incident. We’ve got all of the songs onCards Have Been Dealton the setlist tonight, along with some of our favorite classic rock covers. Sebastian insisted that we do “November Rain” by Guns N’ Roses. It’s his favorite song to play live, and whenever he’s given a choice, he will try and get us to play it.

As we’re coming off stage before the encore, we’re all running on a high, and he says, “Tonight was awesome; did you see the fans go mental when I did the guitar solo for ‘November Rain’?”

“Dude, you’renotSlash, and you never will be. You know that, right?” I give him a cheeky grin.

Sebastian rolls his eyes at me. “That’s fine because I’m better than Slash.”

“Sure, bro. If you say so,” Hayden scoffs.

The lights come back up, interrupting our conversation, and we go back onstage for the encore, which is the only song onCards Have Been Dealtthat we haven’t played tonight, and the crowd goes mad before we say goodbye for a final time.

As we wrap up the encore, Ariana and Heather stand and cheer and clap with the rest of the crowd. I smile at Ariana one last time before we head offstage.

“I’m cut that you guys don’t agree that I’m better than Slash,” Sebastian says, continuing our conversation from before the encore.

Hayden laughs and smirks at him. “It’s not that I don’t agree, per se. It’s just that I don’t think Slash would screw up the outro.”

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