Page 34 of Where We Call Home

“I’m not going to sit here and let you talk about yourself like that,” he said, his tone firm. “Anyone who can’t see how incredible you are is an idiot. You’re being hard on yourself, setting these expectations that you need to be what,perfect? Everything I’m hearing you describe is normal. You’re growing a human being, Theo. There will be changes, you will feel out of control.”

I’d never seen Rhodes so rigid and stern before. It was a shock to my system, short-circuiting the emotions swirling inside me and replacing them with something quieter. Calmer.

“Rhodes…” I replied.

“You’re beautiful,” he continued, his voice softening. “You’re kind, funny, and so damn strong. I need you to realize that you’re doing enough. Youareenough. You need to give yourself grace.”

My throat tightened. What was there to say? I nodded, unable to form words.

“Say it,” he pressed. “I need to hear you say it, Honey.”

“I know,” I whispered, though I wasn’t sure I believed it.

Rhodes sighed, the tension in his shoulders easing. “Those thoughts you’re having? They’re trying to protect you, in a twisted way. But they’re not helping. I know what it’s like to look in the mirror and not see yourself. To feel like you’re disappearing.” The expression on his face fell softer. The red tone on his skin began to dissolve.

His voice cracked slightly, and I saw something shift in his eyes—a flicker of vulnerability. My hand moved on its own, reaching out to touch his face. The stubble on his cheek was rough against my palm, grounding us both.

“Rhodes,” I said softly, searching his gaze.

For a moment, we stayed like that, connected in a way words couldn’t explain. Then he cleared his throat and leaned back, breaking the spell.

“I get it, Theo,” he said, his eyes on the road again. “I know how it feels. But you’re stronger than you think. And you’re not alone.”

His words settled in my chest, a comforting weight. Maybe he was right. Maybe I didn’t have to carry all of this by myself.

“Tell me,” I demanded. “Tell me what it’s like. Does it ever get better?”

I didn’t know what I was looking for in my question. Did what get better? The feeling of loneliness. The uncertainty. The feeling of not wanting to be a failure. The feeling that life as you knew it was slipping away.

I didn’t know what it was like to be a mother, what if I fucked it all up? What if I failed my daughter? I was adding another identity, another role I’d be stepping into. Friend. Daughter. Worker.Mother.

Rhodes nodded. “I have my moments where the thoughts come back, but I’m able to shove it into a box and tuck it deep into the corner of my mind.”

“I’m sorry you went through that,” I spoke softly. I assumed he was referring to what happened between him and Jess.

“I used to feel sorry for myself but I’m glad it happened when it did. If she was willing to leave me after all those years together, what’s to say she wouldn’t have done the same after marriage and a family.”

“You planned a family and future with her too,” I don’t know why that’s what I chose to respond with. It was more so in sadness thinking about what he’d lost.

“I haven’t thought much about what my future looks like now. When Jess left, she took a big part of me with her.” Rhodes looked at me,reallylooked at me. The rumbling of the idling engine filled the silence before he spoke again. “That created a lot of self-doubt, and I didn’t handle it well. I felt like I couldn’t turn to my friends because they didn’t get it. Instead, I turned to some not-so-healthy ways to numb the pain.”

Sitting here with him, listening to his side of the story, I couldn’t shake the feeling that we were meant to find each other at this exact moment. Like some unseen force had nudged Rhodes Dunn into my life right when I needed him most—when I needed to be seen, to be understood.

“How did you change?”

“Therapy. Opening up and allowing myself to feel things. Shoving it away made it worse.”

I used to open up, but my person was no longer here. Nearly sixteen years later, I was still living with the impact of their sudden departure.

“You should also talk to Aspen and Penny. I wish I had opened up more to Boone or Logan when I needed someone.” Rhodes added. “But know, you don’t need to hide from me.”

“Thank you, Rhodes,” I said, looking down and playing with my hands. “I’ll try not to hide, on purpose.”

I looked up at him, and he met me with a knowing smirk. His hand found my knee, a gentle squeeze that sent warmth through me. It wasn’t just from his touch, but from the unspoken understanding between us.

“Let’s get you home,” he said, putting the truck in drive.

“I do have a question.”

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