Page 71 of Finding Hope

“Second year fighting?” The blood drains from my face. “But she’seight.”

“Well,” Tina grins, “she’s actually nine now, but they can start training around five if they want to. Then competing around seven.”

“But they’re kids!”

Laughing, she spoons a delicate serving of chocolate fudge ice-cream into her mouth. “They’re padded up to within an inch of their lives, but don’t worry, it’s non-contact.”

“Non-contact?”

“Yeah, so it’s more of a technical fight. You show you can do the moves, but you don’t actually hit each other.”

“But what if they accidentally do anyway?”

“Well, they’re padded up. It’s a lot of fun, and adorable as hell.”

I turn to Evie and study the innocentlookinggirl with wild curls. “Have you fought?”

She nods with arrogance. “Duh. And I win, too.”

“Do you ever get hurt?”

“Nah.” Cool as a cucumber, she talks of this kiddie fighting sweatshop like it isn’t a big deal. “I broke my arm once, but that was an accident.”

“You broke– You.” Like a guppy, my mouth moves, but words refuse to form. “What?”

“It’s not what you think,” Tina laughs. “The kidswantto fight, but they’re never forced to. Evie and Bean fight, because they’re brutes. And Jamie and Bryan do, too. But Alexandra and Brookey don’t, because they’re not interested. The younger kids don’t train yet, because they haven’t shown interest the way the older girls did, but the twins will start soon. Those boys need a physical outlet soon, or the whole world might blow up.”

I turn to Evie. “When do you fight proper fights? Like, when do you start hitting each other?”

“When I’m sixteen.” Her pout implies she wants to hit and be hittoday. What I see as punishment, she sees as something to rush toward. Standing, she licks a long trail of ice-cream from her wrist, then tosses a napkin to the table. “I have to use the bathroom.”

“Want me to come with you, babe?”

Rolling her eyes – because she’s a badass fighter – Evie acts as though Tina’s suggestion is ludicrous. “No, Mom. I’ve got it. Back in a sec.”

“So…” As soon as Evie moves inside the parlor, Tina’s wicked grin has my stomach dropping. “You and Jack?”

I thought Evie was trouble, but I now realize the error of my ways.So naïve, Britt. So fricken naïve!“No. Me and Jack are… nothing.”

“But you’re friends?”

I laugh. “I don’t even know what we are, to be honest. I’ve only seen him twice since,” I nod my head like an idiot, “you know. He was a total jerk that night, but he’s made up for it since then. It was like day and night. I guess we’re friends, sure. Friends that never actually hang out or talk.”

Tina’s eyes turn mysteriously stormy. “That day and night thing; he was going through something… big. Huge, really. But that’s not who he is.” Sighing, she considers her words. “I’ve known Jack since he was a teenager. He’s a sweetheart deep down; a trouble making, smartass, jokester, flirty sweetheart, but a sweetheart nonetheless. He’s not the guy who kicked you out of his house that time.”

The blush burns my cheeks and sends my eyes downward. That might’ve been the most humiliating night of my life.

“Anyway,” she continues on a happier note. “I didn’t set out to pimp my baby brother to you. I just wanted you to know he’s better than that guy you first met. He’s a good man. He’s loyal and sweet; and those things might be his biggest flaws right now. His loyalty hurts him, because it won’t allow him to move into a healthier stage of life. I guess I just don’t want you to think the worst. He’s a good man.”

Nodding, I finger the letter in my pocket and consider her words. Hedidshow me a horrible man once, but he also showed me a gentle lover, a sweet uncle, a kind friend.

I don’t know him, not really, and though I wouldn’t mind spending time with him,I’mnot in the right mental space to look for something more, either.

This is my year of fun.

My year to find me.

A date, I could do. Fun, casual sex, I could do. But Jack and I – neither of which are in a good headspace right now – we’d make fireworks. But not the good kind.

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