Page 48 of Finding Hope

I lift a glass of water to my lips and attempt to hide my rolling eyes. “She’s not my responsibility guys, so stop it. I’m not gonna ruin her date. I’ve already hurt her enough.”

“I’m telling you, man, she didn’t like his hands on her.”

“And I’m telling you, she’s no wallflower. You saw her at my place, Jon. She doesn’t need to be saved. If she doesn’t want him near her, she’ll brain him with a wine bottle.”

“I wish she’d brain you,” Tina grumbles bitterly.

Shocked, I sit back like she punched me in the face. “What the hell did I do to you, pissy pants?”

“I think it’s residual anger from what you did to that nice girl,” she laughs. “Iwasover it, but now I see her and I’m mad again.”

“That’s not fair. I didn’t do it tonight!”

She shrugs. “It is what it is, Jack. Women stick together, andyouwere a jerk.”

If I didn’t love my family so damn much, I might hate them.

The following morning after Annie and I go for our daily run – and I proudly last longer than ten minutes without nearly dying – I shower and get dressed.

Whistling, I slap my thigh. “Let’s go, Annie. We’re going for a drive.”

Darting down the hall with her leash in her mouth, Annie’s three legs and her ass slap the stairs as she zips down them and slides along the smooth tile at the bottom.

Smiling, I pick up my phone and keys and shove them into pockets. Picking up my black Yankee’s ballcap, I study the insignia for a moment before dropping it on my head and tucking my uncut hair behind my ears.

Following Annie, Idon’tslap my ass on the stairs, but I make my way to the kitchen and stop to watch Kit making morning tea with my youngest niece. The older kids are in school, but baby Emma is still only four, so she stays home with Kit, or more often, she’s at the gym with the rest of us.

“Hey, Kit.” I stop and wait for her to distractedly look up. “I’m going for a drive.”

Smiling beautifully, she stops moving and gives me her full attention. Never in my life have I stopped and noticed how truly beautiful my sister is. She was my enemy more often than not, because authority was my enemy. But now that I’m taking my head out of my ass for two minutes, I see the woman, the mother, instead of the moat always trying to protect me.

I saw her as an obstacle. She was simply trying to be my armor.

“Okay.” She lifts Em from the counter and sets her on the floor. “Want me to make you something to eat first?”

Em dashes forward and crashes into my legs, but ignoring the blonde beauty for two seconds, I move toward Kit and pull her into my arms.

I never hug her just because I love her.

And that might be one of my biggest sins yet.

I’m not perfect. And I’m definitely not ‘better’ yet, but today’s an okay day.

Today’s a good day.

“Thank you for taking care of me.” I press a kiss to her hair. “Thank you for everything.”

Tensing in my arms, predictably, she sniffles, then shrugs my words off. “It’s just oats and berries.”

“No.” Chuckling, I squeeze her once more. “It’s a hell of a lot more than that. Thank you.”

Sighing, she leans into my chest and relaxes. “You’re welcome, Jack. For everything. I’ve always got your back.”

Yeah. She does. She always has. “I love you. I’ll be back later.”

Skipping out the front door after dropping a kiss on Em’s head, I move to my car and smile at the giant, crude lettering dragged through the paint of my otherwise immaculate Mustang.

Every other day before now, the lettering made me cringe. It was a painful reminder of who I am when I’mthatperson, which is precisely why I never had it buffed out. Like the Scarlet Letter, a self-imposed punishment, I keep it to warn myself not to become that prick again.

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