Page 16 of In God's Name

Elijah

It’s been days since I woke up to darkness. Light filters in every few hours as someone brings in a small tray of food and water. My hands are bound to the floor, forcing me to eat by bending down to the tray on the ground. It’s dehumanizing. I’ve begun to lose track of time, just waiting over and over again for the sliver of light. I’ve begun to pray to it as though somehow God will come through it and grant me either a swift death or some form of release. Anything other than another minute of darkness.

My chin dips down into the bowl of water that has been left for me today, my tongue dipping into what's left of its cool remnants. The liquid coats my dry tongue in a baptism of torture. As I begin to sit back up I swear I’ve finally lost it when Lilith’s screams begin to echo around the chamber. My ultimate failure, coming back to haunt me.

It’s not until her sobs start filling my ears that it clicks for me that this is real. “Lilith?” I question with so much hesitation I’mnot too sure I even uttered the word. Her sobs quiet down, so I speak up again just to make sure. “Lilith is that you?”

“Elijah?” She whispers. “Where am I?”

“The Garden,” is all I manage to respond with. I thought by now she would be dead. Coming to terms with the idea that I’ve been mourning someone who is still living shocks me to my core.

“What?” her meek voice responds. I can’t see her but from the sound alone I’m able to tell that she's across the room from me.

“The Garden,” I repeat, “I’m so sorry Lilith. I didn’t mean for this to happen.” Silence follows my words and once again I’m left with nothing but darkness. Please don’t leave me alone . “Kameron was supposed to kill you. You were getting too close.”

Before Lilith can respond, a holy grail of light filters through the room. A young man in scrubs makes his way into the room, carrying a second tray of food and another bowl of water. I turn towards where I suspect Lilith is and my stomach drops as I look at her. Her dress has been shredded and blood decorates every bare inch of her skin. She’s still laying down, her eyes shut as if she couldn’t care less about who just joined us.

“You will get three meals a day. Water is filled once a day,” the nurse states as he bends down and places them on the floor next to Lilith’s head. He stands up and turns his head, glancing over to me. Shame radiates through my body as he looks at me as though I am less than human.

Just as he takes his first step, Lilith quickly rises from where she was laying on the floor and bites down on his calf. The man screams as he tries to pull away, but the restraint just forces her to bite down harder. Blood begins to soak through

the material of his pants as he continues screaming and trying to kick her off. Her eyes are wild, almost that of a rabid dog.

With one final kick, he’s able to release himself from her hold. Immediately spitting on her he growls out, “If you’re going to act like a bad dog, you will be treated as one.” As the last of thethreat leaves his lips, he kicks over her water, letting the liquid slosh over the concrete around her. Tears swell up in her eyes, but she doesn’t let them fall as she smiles up at him with bloody teeth.

My heart rate quickens as he walks out of the room, stealing the light along with him. Lilith’s laugh begins to flow through the room. The sound sends chills down my spine. “Lilith?” I question with a hint of fear. What’s happened since I’ve been gone?

“Don’t you dare speak to me like that Elijah. You created this monster.” Her threat holds weight. My stomach rolls trying to think of what she already knows. “You lied to me. You stole from me. You hurt my family.” Each claim stabs the emotional knife deeper into my chest.

“I never wanted to hurt you,” is all I manage to say back. The silence strangles me as I silently pray for a reply. I’d rather be consumed by her anger than left with nothing again.

Chapter twenty

Kameron

Istare at the funds in my account unable to move. This was everything I fought for. This was my ticket out. Why do I feel so unredeemable? What was so different about Lilith to make me finally feel an ounce of guilt? There’s nothing I can do now.

I turn on my tv, as the news of her missing status is blared through the speakers. Leah, Jacob’s wife and Lilith’s best friend, reported her missing after a few days. The news consumed the story, spreading rumors about what could’ve happened to her.

“Was she involved with Jacob’s drug problem?” The middle aged newscaster questions her co host.

“It’s definitely a connection we can’t look past,” he responds towards the camera. Anger swells in my chest as I hear them continue on. The weight of how this story has been spun crushes me. Jacob wasn’t supposed to be involved. He had been trying to find the car as he had left a bag in the trunk. None of this was supposed to be about addicts or painting a stranger as a murderer. What have I done?

My hands tug at my hair as I try to slow down my thoughts but everything continues to spiral out of control. I’ve been playing on the wrong side for so long now I’ve lost sight of who I was.

Without thinking it through I quickly pull up my phone and call Apollyon. “Hey I need to get into The Garden. I’m on my way.”

“I knew you wouldn’t be able to stay away. The torture is the best part.” He gives a light laugh before hanging up. Relief floods my system that his judgment of character has shown no improvements. I don’t believe in heaven and hell anymore, but I do believe in redemption. My life lost all purpose as my parents drowned to death in front me. And it only got so much worse as Apollyon took me in as his own. Raised me like a son. Touched me like a lover. I shake my head trying to erase the thoughts. I buried those long ago, it was the only way to survive. I had been so ready to throw my life away just to escape him, but the truth is I’m not ready to end this chapter of my life. It can’t finish like this.

Within five minutes, I’m sliding into the driver's seat of my car. The heat brushes against my exposed skin as the air comes on. I allow the nausea already building in me to become worse as my body’s temperature continues to rise. I deserve every ounce of pain I receive.

The ride to the facility feels as though it happened in a blink of an eye. My thoughts raced the entire way here, trying to figure out what I even planned on doing. If I even had the guts to do so. As I pull up I see Apollyon standing outside next to the back door, the light above beaming down on him as though he is some holy patron, here to lead me to salvation. The door behind him leads directly into the clinic’s basement. The definition of hell on earth.

It started off small, with trying to figure out if the Lord was able to remove the sins of the people without medicine orhuman intervention. Drug abusers were sent down there with food, water, a bed, and a bible. They tried this for years until the amount of deaths from withdrawal were starting to obtain

attention from the media. Apollyon knew better than to let them catch on. “The lord can not be understood by everyone. If that was the case, Jesus wouldn’t have needed apostles,” he had said to me right before changing gears.

I had already lost my faith by then, but the fear I held in my heart for the young boy inside me was too much for me to speak up. I continued to go along with his games, hoping someday I could afford to start over.

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