Page 51 of Whisper Woods

“Okay.” There is a sniffle and he does the throat clearing cough again. “Right, well, I better let you get onto it. Can I know what you’re doing, at least?”

I expel a shaky breath, rubbing at the spot in my chest that always aches when I think too hard about Rafe and his secrets.

“I wish I could tell you.” An absolute truth. “But I can’t. I’ll be in touch as soon as I can, though. I promise.”

There is a stifled sound through the line and I feel a flash of intense sympathy for my parents about all my secrecy lately. It couldn’t have been nice to hear all the rumours about your son facing death with ghost giants or whatever other dumb stories the gossipy beings of the Woods spread about our trip to the cottage.

“Okay, son. I’ll let you go then. I hope you find what you’re looking for.”

Fuck, I love my dad.

“Same, Dad. Love you.”

“Love you, too, son.”

Tears burn my eyes, threatening to spill over.

“Bye Dad.”

Dad’s voice has the same reedy strength to it when he speaks. “Bye Seff.”

Hanging up feels so final. I stare at the blank screen for several moments, trying to piece together the immensity of what I’ve just done. I feel a little shaky as I send a quick message to Mauvy that I’m leaving my car there, and strip off,getting my little go bag from my glove box.

Once my clothes are secure in the car, I let Wolf take over; the change ripples through our body. He doesn’t hesitate, bolting through the carpark and out into the Woods with breakneck speed. I try to remind him that we’ve got a long run ahead of him, to pace ourselves, but he ignores me with a snarling growl, utterly determined to get to Rafe as quickly as his four paws will get us there.

The cliffs aren’t close and on foot, well human feet, it would take a lot longer. But Wolf can take the paths that I wouldn’t be able to go on my own. The Woods flies past in blurs of dark greens and shadows, Wolf’s canine eyes sensing the world in entirely new lights. It’s a surreal feeling, being a passenger in a body. I’ve tried to explain it to non-shifter beings and humans, but it’s impossible to find the words to someone who could never have the experience.

I’ve had mages and witches liken it to working with the astral realm, but consideringI’venever donethatI have no idea if it’s true. But I can feel everything he does, every scrape of the trees as he rushes past, every flying leap he takes, every jolt to his body as he lands. But it’s a numb feeling. Separate to me and my existence. We can tune each other out, go to the nothing place when we’re in the back seat, and it’s something I’ve been grateful for over the years when Wolf’s been off doing… Wolf things.

There are dangers for shifters, having our consciousness shared like this. It’s a constant balancing act. While our “human” sides need to maintain most of the control, if it goes too far either way, it creates all kinds of problems. I remember when I was a kid, there was one older man in the pack. He lost his mate and slipped into a deep depression. As he got more and more sick, his wolf started taking on a more dominant force. But his wolf wasn’t dealing with the loss of his mate either… He’d become vicious, a danger even by Colin’s standards. I’d only been five or so at the time, but after he attacked pack members, unprovoked outside of the fighting ring, he’d been sent into a shifter care facility in the city.

I let my mind drift back to Wolf to check in, feeling our body flagging. I don’t bother asking how long we’ve been running for. Wolf’s understanding of time is pretty loose. Light is day, dark is night and we do shit in between.

You all good bud?I ask as he leaps deftly between rocks in our path. Our chestis heaving, each muscle aching, but Wolf keeps going with the type of laser focus I’ve never found even once in my life.

Well, except for when I’ve got Rafe’s hands on me. Then the entire world falls away into nothingness.

Good. Get to Rafe soon. Almost scent him.Wolf lets out a small growl as he slips on mossy grass, scrambling to keep on his feet. I can feel his frustration at my distraction so I sink back to let him go.

I let the flashing of our surroundings distract me from my mind. It’s in moments like this, when we’re running, when I understand how that guy let his wolf take over in his grief. I’m here, but I’m not. I’m conscious, but it’s dull. I can let go of the constant hammering of my brain. It would be easy, I think, when the world got too much, to let it all go.

Wolf’s body sharpens, every sense pinging into high awareness. Our skin tingles as his fur stands on end, ears twitching, nose scenting the air.

Close. He’s right. The subtle smokey, sweet scent grows stronger, as Wolf barrels his way through the Woods with absolutely no regard to our safety. That same fizzlingawarenessof Rafe, his closeness pulls at me.

My turnI try to shove my way to the surface but Wolf pushes back harder, doubling down on his efforts, just as eager to be in Rafe’s presence.

We fight for dominance over our body, but I can’t force the change. The magic shimmers around us making the world wonky for a bit.

But Wolf wins the race, leaping from the trees like we’re flying—I’ve changed during one of his leaps before and the landingsucks—skidding to a stop on the gravelly clearing on the cliffs.

Wait!With all of my power I try to stop Wolf, but he continues on, shoving back at me almost carelessly as he trots, tail wagging, tongue lolling out our mouths towards the being standing at the edge of the cliffs.

The being who smells like Rafe.

Feelslike Rafe.

But that… can’t be Rafe.

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