Page 84 of Ruckus

“Josh?” I frown.

“I just needed you to cry off for one night. A few loose screws here and there, I could made him go away. We could have made that act ours.” I take in what he says and try not to react.

“I had to think of a new plan when you left. That's why I told you he was coming for you. I just needed the chance to show you.”

“Show me what?” I feel my tears drip over his fingers.

“That I can take care of you. Freya, I killed him. Drew can’t ever strike you again, I made sure he could never hurt you.”

“You killed Drew too?” Josh tried to be brave but he was always so scared of Drew.

“The show left town and Drew refused to go with them until he had you back. He was coming for you and I couldn’t let him hurt you, anymore. I stayed with him, told him I’d help him get you back and then…” He looks over my shoulder at Cam and shrugs.

“No, you wouldn’t do that. Drew was your brother.”

“See there you go, underestimating me, you always did that. You thought I was weak because I didn’t fight back at him. Nah…I was just cleverer than he was. I needed you to think you were in danger. I wanted you to run with me, we could have goneanywhere. I was thinking Florida, you loved it there.” He smiles and I try to steady my panic, because Josh has clearly gone fucking crazy.

“I get you wanted to stay close to your brother after what happened to your sister, and when you asked me to stay, you gave me more of that hope, Freya.” His eyes go a little crazy and his laughter sounds bitter. “I did what you wanted. I even put on this stupid fuckin’ kiddy cut because I wanted you to look at me the way you looked at Ruckus.”

I close my eyes and shake my head.

“No… don’t do that, you look at me.” Josh's hand goes firm as it grips around my jaw. “Open your eyes and look at what you did.” I do as he says and see his pupils flared like he’s possessed. “You made this crazy. It wasn’t there before you came. I would never have hurt Drew, or…” He looks at the blood on the knife he’s holding, like it suddenly repulses him.

“You told me Ruckus was just fun, I accepted that. But I watched you, Freya, and I saw...”

“Josh, if the people here know you killed Cam, they’re gonna kill you.” I try to make him realise how much trouble he’s in. “You need to get out of here before anyone wakes up.” It must still be early, the club is so quiet.

“You know I was gonna kill that bastard too. I hated him for all those nights he got to spend with you. But when you left I saw that you did it to him too. You made him a mess. Because that's what you do, you mess with a man, you give him hope, and then you…” His fingers tense. “You crush it.”

“Josh, you don’t understand. I had to leave with Cam, he made me.”

“Bull shit, Freya, he’s just another poor bastard who you fooled. I did him a favour.”

I shake my head against his hold, but I can see it’s pointless trying to make him see sense.

“So what's your plan, we leave here and go to Florida?” I try not to sound scared.

“You think I still want you?” He laughs at me hysterically. “Freya, it’s too late for that, you can only kick a man down so many times before he stops getting back up. I’m going back to the show, back to my real family. I just want to give you something to remember me by.” He holds the knife against my throat using it to force me onto my back, and when he starts to unbuckle his belt I don’t care if he slices me open…I scream.

“Hound…Hound!” I shake the useless fucker awake. Yeah, it’s ass-crack of dawn early but I couldn’t stay in that motel room a second longer. I had to make a stop at Uncle Vin’s on the way here, and when I realized how late it was when I got here, I decided to get myself a room and wait till morning.

Now morning’s come and I’m ready for this conversation that me and Freya need to have.

“Huh, what?” Hound lifts his head from the table he’s resting over, and uses a finger to push the white residue under his nose up his nostrils.

“What the fuck are you doin’ here?” He looks at me with one eye still shut.

“I came to speak to Freya, she here?” I get that what I’m about to do could easily cause a civil war, and I get that Cam has feelings for Freya but they don’t match mine. Once I’ve spoken with her, I’ll deal with him man to man and hope we can leave things on friendly terms for the sake of our charters.

“Do you know what time it is?” Hound heads over to the couch where one of the Arizona members is sleeping with a whore passed out and straddled on top of him. He lifts the guy's wrist so he can look at his watch

“It ain’t even seven thirty.”

“I know, but this is urgent. I need to talk to Freya,” I tell him again, losing my patience.

“Well, she and Prez are in their room, and we’ve been given strict fuckin’ orders to never disturb ‘em.” He winks at me as he lifts the bottle of Jack up off the floor and drinks from it. I won’t let myself think about the fact they’ve been sleeping together for five nights straight, that's the kinda shit that sends a man crazy.

“Hound, thisisimportant.” I didn’t want to face off with Cam before I got the chance to speak to Freya alone, but I ain’t waiting any longer. I start heading for the stairs, knowing that one of the rooms on the second floor is his.

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