Page 17 of Ruckus

“It’s spacious.” She looks around the large room that acts as a kitchen, living room, and a bedroom while I take out some sweatpants and a T-shirt for her.

“Put these on, that costume’s distracting. You can clean yourself off in the shower.” I open the bathroom door so she know where it is.

“You need a shower more than I do.” She looks me over and I shake my head.

“Just…” I point my head to the door and urge her to go through it.

Freya doesn’t argue like she would have before, she just smiles sadly and does as she’s told.

I sit on the edge of my bed once she closes the door, resting my elbows on my knees and exhaling with relief.

What are you doin’, Ruckus? What the fuck are you doin’?”

I could have taken her anywhere, to Wrath’s houseboat, to a hotel, but instead I brought her here… and put her in my clothes. Bad i-fuckin’-dea.

Freya ran away, she would have done it for a reason, dragging her back here ain’t gonna change that reason. Even if it did, what does it matter? She’s still Wrath’s sister. Our one night together should never have fuckin’ happened.

When the door eventually opens I quickly get back on my feet and as I shove my hands in my back pockets I realize that I’m fuckin’ nervous. She smiles at me as she steps back into the room, and seeing her in clothes that belong to me makes me wanna kiss her again.

“That’s better… you look…” I don’t finish my sentence, instead I shake my head and move past her. I need to wash that abusive cunt’s blood off my hands.

“I didn’t need you to do that tonight, you know.” She follows me and leans against the bathroom door frame. Infuriating me even more. “I had it handled.”

“Handled?” I look at her in shock. “Handled?!” I raise my voice as I drag her to stand in front of me. Forcing her to look in the mirror. “Does that lookhandledto you?” I slam my wet palm into the reflection in rage. “Fuck, Freya, for once in your stubborn life, be honest with yourself.” She closes her eyes as I yell at her, and I force myself away, sit my ass on the edge of the bathtub, and bury my head in my still soaked hands. The silence seems to go on forever, and the questions swirling around my head are making me dizzy.

“How long?” I tap my foot against the floor, trying to tamp down my rage.

“A few years,” she admits quietly.

“Years?” I feel the imaginary knife that's wedged inside my chest twist.

“How do you let something like that go on for years?” Standing up, I grab at her shoulders and force her to spin around and look at me.

“Don’t touch me.” She shoves me away, storming back through to the bedroom and wiping the tears from her eyes.

“I never asked you to come back tonight, Ruckus, I didn’t ask you to save me.” She pulls the sleeves of my sweater up her arms as she puts on a brave face and turns back to face me with it.

“Yes you did.” I scowl at her. “I saw that look you gave me through that window, you were begging me to fuckin’ save you. So that's what I did. I came back and I saved you.”

“So why didn’t you save me two years ago, in Palm Springs?” she asks cleverly, knocking me completely off guard.

“I… I don’t know what you're talking about.” I decide to deny all fuckin’ knowledge.

“That's horse shit and you know it. You were there, Ruckus, I found your coin the next day.”

I have no defense, so I just stay quiet, waiting for her to tell me why my being in Palm Springs is relevant to now.

“So why now, why not then?” She keeps going at me.

“Because you looked happy!” I yell at her in frustration. How could I have got it all so wrong?

“And what now? You expect me to just pick up where I left off here? What about us and what happ…”

“There ain’t an us, there never can be,” I snap at her, realizing just how stupid all this is. Yes, I have this undeniable urge to keep her safe. I’ve thought about her every fuckin’ day since we’ve been apart but that’s as far as I can ever let it go.

“So what about that kiss?” She folds her arms judgingly.

“The kiss was a mistake. It was in the moment, and I needed to do something to make you see sense.” I can feel the heat creeping up my neck and I have to scratch it.

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