Page 23 of Own To Obsess

Kardos had left as soon as he left her out and she was severely disappointed. Of course he would have to punish her—the high chief basically warned her to expect it, plus Kardos was also angry that they were bonded. The bond itself had been telling her so all along—she should have believed it. Still, this punishment was extreme. He knew she struggled with confinement—that it had potential to break her, and he still tied her to the wall and forced her to an immobile position with the fog that hurt so many parts of her physically. Why couldn't he pick a different punishment for her? And yet deep down she knew why. The punishment was severe because the action she had taken was severe. The last time he put her in the black box-room was when she had cut him while grooming him. Once again, with the bite, she had drawn blood from him, and this was the punishment for it.

But the thought that she had another four days of this absolute torture kept tears in her eyes for the rest of the day.

The next day, after he dressed, Kardos pulled Shaya out the bed again.

“Desst our pelltra efesha heddressamusteklen,”he said.“Ternee a meegsh suklishat enndyor indit tassesa assay.”“You have four days of punishment for your disobedience. Touch your wrists together when you're ready to start.”

Shaya’s heart sank as the words were spoken. Her throat closed up as she lifted her hands and then dropped them, trembling. How could she ever willingly choose to go back in there?

But when her hands dropped, Kardos growled and the weight in the bond became heavier. She lifted her hands again, lowering her head to take a few deep breaths before she touched them together.

Once again her wrists were bound and she was taken across the room to the door in the corner. As he buckled her in, her panic was already rising and it was impossible to pay attention.

“Do I have to have the same punishment?” she asked hurriedly as she wrenched her body around toward him, but he was ready dropping the liquid on the floor.

As he left, she sucked in a breath, and breathing out slowly, the pain from the previous day a reminder of what she needed to do. How anyone could ever survive this for any length of time. Surely there were people who simply ended up with a destroyed throat?

The fog rose up to her chin again, and she rose as high as she could, tears streaming down her face as she tried her hardest not to sob. She could breathe, she repeated to herself, she wasn’t out of air. And yet it didn’t feel like it.

Once again, she focused tried to focus on something else, and once again, Kardos was the focus. She thought of her Haze and every blissful moment they’d had, wishing she could relive it. Her mind revolved on those hours until the pain in legs finally drifted away. But when he came back in the room, unbuckled her and lifted her up, her legs seized and she was unable to walk for the rest of the day.

The next three days were just as hellish as the first two. It was never something that her body got used to and the anxiety of being restricted never ceased.

Kardos followed the same routine; asking her to choose to be punished, binding her wrists, taking her into the room and buckling her, and activating the fog.

The only thing that helped her improved was that she knew to expect, which sometimes helped her to focus. Her legs were useless to her at first—unable to support her without severe pain—but they also strengthened quickly.

Finally, on the fifth day, she lay in bed crying with relief that she would never have to go in the room again unless she did something terrible. Perhaps Kardos would be kinder to her now that she had completed her punishment, but it was hard to tell.

She dug her nails into her chest, angry at the sharp weight of the bond she had created, that had caused such damage in so many different ways.

CHAPTER FIVE

SHAYA

“I thought you would have been happy to get out of the hut for a change,” Rozalia called to her as they trudged across the deep snow toward the carriage sled that awaited them.

Shaya snorted in response, but knew that Rozalia would not be able to hear her. They had both wrapped themselves heavily with thick layers of clothes and furs before heading outside. The flurries of snow had worsened until it was difficult to even see a few feet ahead. Rozalia held on to Shaya’s arm as they walked, keeping her heading in the correct direction so they didn’t end up too far from the carriage.

“I know this weather doesn't seem like it's worth coming out in,” Rozalia continued. “But I assure you it can be quite beautiful.”

Shaya didn't even respond. Anything was better than being stuck in that house with memories of the fog torture. It was four days since her punishment ended and finally she was able to walk without pain, but she was having trouble sleeping. She could only sleep when Kardos returned at night, parted her legs and sunk his thick length inside her, and she hated that she needed it.

They reached the carriage and hurried inside, but Shaya felt sorry for the guard and the driver who had to remain the outside as they traveled.

“They are trained to work in these conditions,” Rozalia assured her when she asked. “They have excellent eyesight, hearing, and vocal range for this kind of weather. They are used to it.”

Shaya looked out the window to see if she could see the driver, but the flurry was too thick for her to see anything. Rozalia began to draw a curtain across the windows that had been pinned to the corner of the carriage.

Shaya watched her, surprised.

Rozalia folded the edge of the curtain and pinned it to either side of the window and the bottom. It was thick enough to keep the wind and the snow out, blocking any view, but light enough to still let the daylight through. Rozalia did the same for both windows on either side before sitting back down the bench opposite Shaya.

She chuckled seeing her expression. “You didn't think that we sat in here with no protection from the snow, did you?”

The journey was just as quick and smooth as always, but Shaya found it much less enjoyable when she couldn't see out of the windows. She became restless and fidgeted so much on the bench that Rozalia noticed.

“We haven't got that far to go,” she said to Shaya reassuringly. “Only a few more feet.”

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