Page 100 of Vengeful Rotten Casualties

“I’m sorry, Luc.” My voice is scraped raw. I’m so fucking sorry. I didn’t want to do this in front of him, but if I don’t do it now then I know I never will. He’ll convince me it’s not necessary. He’ll convince me that he loves me and that I don’t destroy him by existing. I know the truth and I need to correct the universe’s mistake before it’s too late.

I turn towards him, releasing the metal bar. Another tear slips down my cheek. Fuck me, I’m worse than I thought. Worse than the very men who ruined me. With the light of what looks like his phone now illuminating his face, I can see the sheer panic in his expression. I shake my head as he opens his mouth and, before he can reach me, I step back.

Right over the edge.

44

MICKI

For a second,I don’t feel like anything has happened. Then the wind catches me and slams into my back, bowing me upwards as I fall. My hair whips around my face, clouding my vision.

Falling is harsh. It’s quick. It’s … inescapable.

I wanted the choice to be over. I wanted the pain to end, and now, I’m moments away from that happening. It rips free all of the emotions that, up until this moment, had still been buried within me.

My guilt, I realize, was only surface deep. Inside, there’s so much more. A valley of it so deep and full, it swallows me up. The tears fall upward—draining from my eyes faster than the gravity of Earth can drag me down.

A light appears above me, right where I was. It’s too late now, though. It’s over. I open my mouth. To say what? I don’t know. There are no words left. No more apologies because the decision has been made and no amount of “I’m sorry” can ever erase my actions. Even if it’s true.

Iamsorry.

Sorry that I ever fell in love with Luc Kincaid. Sorry that I wasn’t strong enough for him. Sorry that I deceived him this whole time. Sorry that it had to end like this. My only hope now is that he can give up and move on.

I close my eyes, secure in that last wish. The universe, though, is a cruel, dark bitch. A shout sounds above me and my eyes shoot back open as the light of Luc’s phone flashlight comes careening over the edge.

With mounting shock and horror, I realize it’s not the phone itself because that falls one way, the light skittering through the dark ravine, flipping over and over and revealing a separate figure.

Luc.

My mind struggles to catch up with what I’m seeing, but it isn’t until his body slams into mine. It isn’t until his arms close around me and I’m tipped backwards, my head down instead of my back to the ground that it hits me. He’s here. He’s falling too.

My mouth opens on a scream.

No. He can’t.

Why would he—

The scream never makes it out because with his body against mine, the world speeds back up—the slow fall suddenly races to the front of everything—and we come crashing down.

A thousand pinpricks slam into my body as we hit water. My lips part as pain slices through me.

I thought dying would be easier than this. I thought it would be painless.

It’s anything but.

Another difference—I thought I would be alone.

I’m not.

Luc’s arms never leave me. Not even when the current rips at our limbs, dragging us one way and then another. Agony races up my spine. I’m sure I’ve broken something. My legs get twisted around something slimy and water invades my nostrils, diving into my mouth. I cry out, swallowing more of the disgusting, ice cold liquid.

It pushes down my throat, into my lungs.

Strong fingers grip onto me. Luc’s legs kick against mine. I twist from side to side, trying to break free. From him. From the weeds pulling me further under.

Let go, I beg him silently.Just … let go.

Luc is a stubborn bastard, though. He refuses. His hands tighten on me until I fear he might break my arms as well. Everything hurts. My body feels crushed, like there’s nothing but loose broken pieces of bone inside of the flesh of my skin.

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