Page 48 of That One Moment

My fingertip dances up his arm, and along his shoulder. His skin is warm but he shivers when I draw a line into the dip of his clavicle.

“Caiden.” My name is a warning on his lips.

Our eyes meet. My heart stills.

I don’t know who moves first or if either of us does. Perhaps the world tilts and throws us together in a sudden, fortuitous shift.

Jamie’s lips crash into mine in a kiss that is more a savage meeting of two mouths. I grab at his chest, digging my nails into his skin while trying to find purchase. His tongue fights for dominance, flicking against mine until he’s pushing it into my mouth. He bites at my lower lip and I groan, fighting him forcontrol. My tongue slips into his mouth, my tongue ring clacking against his teeth before he sucks on it in a way that has my dick thickening.

Far, far, away in the back of my mind, there’s this thought that I’m a terrible brother, but it’s not enough to stop me. There is every possibility regret will eat me alive later.

Jamie’s hand comes up between us and he grips the front of my neck, his fingers digging into the sides of my windpipe as he squeezes. My eyes widen and he pulls away.

His own eyes are dark, the green of his irises swallowed up by his blown out pupils, and his lips are spit slick and swollen.

One, two, three breaths pass as we stand like this, both breathing heavily, staring like we're seeing each other in a new, unexpected light. He makes a sound like a wounded animal before slamming his lips back to mine, his hold on my neck still firm.

My arms come to wrap around his shoulders and I scratch lines over the muscles there. He flinches when I’m sure I break the skin, but he doesn’t stop kissing me.

“I do,” he says against my lips. “Think of him. All the time. Even when I’m fucking someone else. Is that what you wanted to hear?” He runs his nose from my cheek to the spot beneath my ear. “But you’re wrong, so fucking wrong.” He sucks at the spot and a shiver runs up my spine. “Will it make you feel better knowing you’re not the only one whose world fell apart that day?” He bites my ear lobe and my hand runs down his side and comes to land on his firm ass. I pull him closer, sucking in a gulp when I feel his erection rub against mine.

I won’t lie and say I’ve never thought about Jamie this way but, I never expected it to actually happen. He’s always been a secret fantasy that was never mine to have.

“Are you thinking about him now?” I ask, knowing full well the answer could sting. I may have put the thought out there but Idon’t want it to be true. Jamie spins me around and slams me into the counter, pressing my chest onto the cool marble. His body folds over mine, blanketing me, his cock resting in the gap of my ass cheeks.

“Is that what you want, Caiden? You want me to be thinking about Cooper?” He grabs at the waistband of my sweats and I do the same. Together, we hastily rip them down, my naked ass rubbing against the fabric of his running shorts.

“Or do you want me to tell you that no, right now, I can only think about you. That I came here for you.” He moves behind me and I feel the moment his cock is free. It’s hot and hard as it presses against me.

“Which of those will make you feel better?” Both. None. Neither. I don’t know. Jamie stands up and the heat of his body leaving has goosebumps breaking out on my skin. He reaches for his wallet on the counter near my head and pulls out a condom.

He wraps one hand around my face and presses two fingers into my mouth. I suck on them, my eyes closing under the salty taste and the wickedness of the action. Then, he rips them out of my mouth, slides his hand between my ass cheeks and presses one spit covered finger into my hole. I whimper when he adds a second, pressing my forehead into the counter while arching my back. The burn is unreal and I pant and moan as he thrusts them in and out of me.

“Tell me to stop, Caiden. Tell me this is wrong. Tell me, Caiden,” he begs and I ignore the turmoil in his voice because I can’t tell him to stop. No more than I can push him away. We’re on a rollercoaster that’s lost control. We will crash but not before the ride is over. Not before we’ve felt the rush that comes with falling.

Behind me, Jamie spits and I feel his cock head at my hole. I’m barely stretched and spit is hardly sufficient lube. He spitsagain - I feel it running down my crack before he’s rubbing it in, pressing his finger along my rim where his cock is entering me.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” I whisper. Tears coat my lashes and I move my hips back and forth to get him to move. He ruts into me, keeping one hand on my back so I’m stuck plastered to the marble. Jamie changes his angle, moves his hands to my hips and fucks me harder. His cock hits my prostate and I shudder. The pain is still very present but it’s fading, making my body heat with a sensation of pleasure that starts in my toes and ricochets through my limbs.

Jamie is silent behind me, save for the heavy breaths he's taking as he moves inside me. I wish I could see his face, wish I could read his expression. A hand comes up and wraps around my neck and he uses his grip on me to pull me up so that my head rests against his shoulder. His other hand brushes against my cock but I bat it away. Instead, he places it on my stomach.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he says over and over, in time with his thrusts. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“Why do you… you….keep,” I try to get the words out but he’s fucking the air right out of my lungs, “apologising?”

He doesn’t answer me, just moves faster and brings his lips to my neck where they latch on. From the way it pinches, I’m sure he’s leaving a bruise over the one Oliver left there yesterday.

My dick throbs and my balls draw up tight and I take my own cock in hand and give it a few hard strokes. My head feels light and my entire body tingles. He squeezes my throat tighter as his movements shudder. “Because. Because you didn’t deserve any of it.”

I’m crying now. Crying and floating and so close to coming that I can’t control the words that fall out of me. “I did. I did. I was bad, I messed up.”

His hand on my neck loosens and he tilts my head so I’m looking back at him awkwardly. His eyes are wet, though thelust is still there - deep, dark and wanting. He shakes his head, his brown waves falling over my face, then rests his lips against mine. “No. You’re so fucking good.”

I come on a shudder and a gasp. Thick ropes of cum shoot out, over my hand and the kitchen counter. He wraps his arms around me and holds me to him. My body continues to quake - a mixture of arousal and regret, a tumultuous mess inside of me. Jamie pulls out, and I spin around, watching as he retreats. He’s still hard, the condom still on when he pulls up his shorts.

He’s pale and looks….fuck. He looks ashamed. Of what we just did. It hurts so badly.

When he doesn't say anything, I do. Saving us both from the reality of what we did.

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