Page 34 of Start Your Engines

He winces. “I would die.”

“You’re so fucking dramatic.”

I throw my stress toy at him, but he catches it easily with one of his giant hands. He stares at it and gives it a couple of squeezes before chucking it back.

“Nice toy. Is it helping the stress?”

It’s warm from his touch, and I tuck it into my hoodie pocket as if Connor’s warmth could fill my belly.

I shrug. Is this the time to broach topics that have plagued me since I spoke to Layla?

“When are you going to ask about my pizza toppings?” he asks. “You know I’m my favourite topic of conversation.”

“Fine. What’s the weirdest pizza topping you’ve ever had?”

He’s already on his last piece, and I’m only starting on my third.

“Caramelised banana and peaches. It was a dare. You’re right to make that face. Fruit doesn’t belong on pizza.”

“Not even pineapple?”

“Especially not pineapple. Don’t tell me you’ve become someone who ruins pizza. I can’t bear it, Coults, I really can’t. You must be evil.”

I smirk at him. “I’m the worst. You don’t know the half of it.”

His grin as I wink back has me smiling. With a sassy wiggle of my shoulders, I lick the tomato sauce off my fingers. His smile falters, and his eyes darken. My eyebrows dart together as he stares at my lips and fingers and his thumb strokes down his swallowing throat. He looks at me like I’m a pudding he needs to gorge on. A flush fills my belly, and I grip my stress ball, fumbling it.

Quickly, he clears his throat and points at the photo of my family on my desk as he wipes his full lips with the back of his hand. “Have you heard from him recently?”

“Niki?” I shake my head.

“Me neither. Ralf had a message from him a few weeks ago, but Niki won’t say where he is.”

“You’ve heard from Ralf?”

Although Ralf supported Niki and Connor when we were younger, he mentored me. If Ralf remains in touch with him, why hasn’t he called me? Maybe they think I’m doing a lousy job. Imposter syndrome sneaks up on me often, and as much as I try to fight it, it doesn’t help that I haven’t got someone cheerleading or supporting me.

“Just for a racing chat,” he says, shrugging off the subject. “Do you hear from your dad much?”

“He calls me most days, checking on me. He’s decided I’m failing the company. I’ll never be Niki, the person he wanted at the helm.”

Connor rolls his eyes. “Your dad is a fool. He should believe in you and be grateful. He ran this place into the ground and then foisted it onto Niki, who doesn’t have a business head. This place would have folded by now if he was in charge. You’re doing incredible things, and your family are lucky to have you.”

My mouth is dry, and I push my hand through my short waves. I never thought anyone would say that to me, least of all Connor. I stare at him, and he pins me with his gaze as if to prove he meant every word. I pull up my legs and shift around until I can cross them in my office chair. His eyes dip as I clamber into the chair to get the perfect position. He doesn’t glare at them this time, instead licking his lips. “You’re not in your fancy outfit tonight?”

Is he wondering if I’m this odd and so at ease around everyone? I’m not, but once upon a time, Connor was one of my closest friends.

“I always prefer to be in a hoodie and shorts. You know me.” I bite my tongue. I didn’t mean to say that. Of course he doesn’t know me anymore.

But he nods. “Yes, I do, Coults. I know you.”

The spark in his eyes as he gazes at me makes goose pimples rise on my legs. I suck my lips into my mouth, and he watches the movement. He licks his lips slowly, and I remember all those times I wanted to kiss him. I shouldn’t be attracted to him now.

“How is Layla?” I ask. If I keep talking, I can avoid the Connor-shaped temptation.

“She’s doing well. I’m hoping to see her at some point, but she’s preparing to travel for a couple of months in her summer break from university,” Connor says. He looks down and then back at me. “I heard from my dad.”

I hold my breath.

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