Page 15 of Chill

“Here.” Sam pulls out his phone and seconds later, I feel the vibration of Kieran’s cell against my hip where it’s trapped in his pocket. “Address and photo. Just be careful. He already thinks he has some sort of story, and I’d rather you not scare him into going to the police.” Sam grimaces and sits back, gazing up at the sky. “I’m not spending another fortune to bail us out of shit by buying off some redneck sheriff.Again.”

The idea of that seems…impossible. But I keep my mouth shut.

“We’ll take care of it. Just make sure he disappears after. We’re not dumping that one for you, either,” Kieran warns. Sam sighs and gets to his feet, though I wonder if this is a premature end to their little talk due to either the storm or me.

"You sure you don’t want me to call Erika?” he asks, hesitating and glancing at me once more. “No offense, Noa. But this isn’t something we can afford to have fucked up.” His smile is rueful and apologetic, prompting me to grin back at him.

“I’m not looking to fuck anything up,” I promise, remaining visibly casual. “I’m just here, existing.”

I’m not sure if it’s good enough for him, but the man dips his head in a nod, his blue eyes bright. With one last look at Kieran and a grin traded with Val, he heads for his truck with purpose.

“Go throw that body in there before he conveniently forgets, Val.” Kieran sighs, getting to his feet as well.

“You know he’d forget on purpose,” Val replies, though he jumps to his feet without protest and walks quickly over to Sam, stopping him with words I can’t hear as he points toward the other end of the campsite, on the fart side of the RV I haven’t seen in the daylight.

Not that I’ll get to anytime soon, judging by the way Kieran is suddenly blocking my path to keep me from joining them. “No. Not you.” He reaches out to grip the front of my hoodie, his eyes narrowed and his fingers tight in the fabric under my throat. “You and I are going to have a chat. Though I doubt it’s the one you want.”

“Wait—” Fear bubbles to life in my chest as he drags me toward the RV, marching me there like a problematic child before he yanks open the door and shoves me inside for whateverchatI’m suddenly really not looking forward to.

But I made my bed.

And I’m ready to lie in it and face the consequences.

7

Back in the RV,my hoodie is quick to go right on the table by my backpack, and out of politeness, I kick off my shoes right after Kieran does the same. Before I can do anything else, however, he grabs my arm and tugs me close, eyes on mine. The door opens and closes, just as I can hear the truck engine outside revving.

“No,” he tells me, voice soft and even. “Do you hear me, Noa? You don’t want to go home? Fine. I could make you, but it feels like maybe I don’t have the support I’d need for that.” He casts a quick glance at Val, who’s come in to stick his head in the small fridge and is pointedly ignoring us.

“But if I let you stay, then you’restayinghere. You’re?—”

“Do you like me?” I ask, cutting him off before my confidence fails. The question stops him, and his brows knit in bemusement at the question. “Do you?” I repeat, some of my bravado stripped away now that I have to repeat myself.

“Yes. I’d think that was abundantly clear by now,” Kieran murmurs, still looking like he’s not quite sure where this is going. “Why?”

“Okay, let me try again. Do you like me for more than just sex? More than just to chase through the woods? Do you like mein the ‘doing things together’ way? Stupid shit, fun shit, romantic shit?” God, I can’t believe I’m saying all this. Discussingfeelingsis so far outside of my comfort zone, I might as well be manning a solo trip to outer space. But I can’t back down, or he’ll use it to his advantage.

“I’m in love with you.” He says the words slowly, enunciating them, and they still make my stomach twist and a million doubts come to my head. “And I know you don’t believe that from the look on your face. But I’m not just in love withfuckingyou orchasingyou, Noa.” Almost sweetly, he reaches up to tuck my hair behind my ear while his gaze holds mine. “So yes. I think it’s safe to say I like you enough to do stupid, romantic, or fun shit with you. Though I’m not sure how that applies to this moment.”

“Because if that’s the case, then you can’t just tuck me away in a closet when you don’t want me around. You can’t tell me I only get to deal with part of you instead of accepting all of you.” I take a breath, then let it out with a huff. “I know what you are, okay? In fact, I know what both of you are, and I was aware of it before I decided to ask Erika how to find you.”

Kieran’s eyebrows go up just as I realize I’ve fucked up. “Ah, wait, I didn’t mean—” I begin, but he cuts me off with a snort.

“I was wondering how you found us. Actually, I started thinking you somehow implanted a tracking device on Val when he wasn’t paying attention. Erika really told you where to find us?” He seems more amused than anything, which I’m hoping is a good sign.

“Can you pretend I didn’t say that? Please don’t be mad at her. Or tell anyone.” God, I really don’t want to get her in trouble.

Kieran rolls his shoulders in a shrug. “I have more interesting and pressing things to care about than Erika helping you find us. So go on,” he invites. “Tell me how I can’t push you into that closet over there and lock you in until I feel like letting you out.”

He’s teasing me now, and I hope that’s a good sign. With him, though, I can’t quite tell. “You can’t, because I’m trying to do this thing where I support all of you. Where I’m a part of this, with both of you, even when it’s something that terrifies me or makes me uncomfortable.”

After taking a breath, I add, “Tell me you’ve never killed someone who didn’t deserve it.” I hate how pleading it sounds, but I need them to say it. I need to hear that they aren’t just indiscriminate murderers.

“You know we don’t.” Val sounds almost hurt. “We’re not just mindless serial killers. We’re notmonsters. Well…” He clucks his tongue. “Yeah, we’re monsters. But notthatkind. We’ve never hurt someone that didn’t deserve it, and I don’t know why we would.”

I give him a grateful grin as he slides into the little booth with a bottle of cherry coke in his hand. He salutes me in return and ignores Kieran’s soft scoff of disapproval.

“We don’t do this for fun. Well…” He tilts his head back, then looks at me to give me an almost apologetic grin. “If I told you we don’t enjoy it, I’d be lying. But you have to live with that. Knowing we don’t enjoy it enough to take it further than taking care of people who deserve it. That I can promise you. And we never will.”

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