Page 50 of The Good Boys Club

“What’s up?” He nudged my fingers with the tips of his.

“Huh?”

“Come on, dude, I know you. You’ve been quiet all day.”

“I’m always quiet,” I countered.

“Not with me.”

I looked at Mash. Observed the perfect way his blonde lashes brushed the underside of his brow, the divot between them that I almost never saw, the stiff set of his jaw. I hesitated.

He turned away from me, glanced out to the lake, at the reflection of the crescent moons rippling gently on the surface.

As long as he was looking in the other direction, I could talk. I wasn’t about to tell him the full truth, but I could share a little of my worries. “It’s all the stuff Kai was saying about finding the other part of his whole.” It was a beautiful speech. Achingly beautiful. “I just wonder . . . if that’ll be me one day.” I puffed out a breath. “Will I ever find the other half of my whole?”

I expected Mash to make a joke about my hole. He didn’t. Surprisingly, he remained serious when he said, “But mate, you’re twenty-four. Why would you be worrying about something like this?”

“Zach and Kai met at school. Clem and Sean met when they were nineteen. My folks were already married at my age. I feellike, if I am ever going to get married, I should have met my husband by now. I’m twenty-four and my longest relationship has been eight months.”

A pair of bats flitted over our heads, no doubt hunting for bugs. In the distance, a tawny owl hooted.

“You know I think this fated-mates stuff is all bullshit, right?” Mash said. He still wasn’t looking at me, he was gazing out over the water.

“Maybe. But I don’t want to be lonely any more. I want someone who makes me excited to share the mundane details of my life, like grocery shopping, or going on train rides, or like how the MOT on my car went.”

“Like a friend? I do all those things with you and we have a riot.”

“Exactly, but . . .” Someone who feels the same way back. “Someone who is . . . mine, and I’m theirs.”

“Oh,” he said. He picked at some dirt from beneath his thumbnail. “What happened with you and Guy? I thought you two were getting pretty serious? Last I heard, you were going to Bordalis with him for a weekend.”

“Yeah, no . . . we broke up!” I said.

“What the fuck? When did this happen? Why didn’t you tell me?” Mash was already pissed off on my behalf and he had none of the background details. I loved it when his loyalty was this unwavering. Or perhaps he was pissed I hadn’t told him sooner.

“Not yesterday . . . day before. I didn’t say anything because you were . . .” Being weird. “Nervous about Zach’s wedding.”

“Hmm,” he said, evidently deciding not to expand on the weirdness, thereby making it that much weirder. “Why’d he break up with you?”

“No, I broke up with him.”

“Why?”

I pursed my lips together and shook my head. No way I could tell Mash the reason. “It’s not important.”

“Yes it fucking is. Tell me.”

“No, I don’t want to.”

“Well, you have to. We don’t keep secrets from each other.”

I stared at him. I knew in my heart Mash was keeping something from me, and possibly had been since we met five years ago, but I chose not to mention it. Another thing I was too afraid to ask him about.

“Tell me,” he demanded.

I groaned, scrubbed a hand down my face. “Fine, okay. Guy said I was terrible at kissing. He said it was like . . .” I puffed out a breath. “Like kissing a sheepshead fish. You know . . . one of those fish with human teeth.”

Mash snorted his laugh out through his nose. “Oh my gods, that’s hilarious.” He sobered up the instant he clocked my scowl. “I mean, he’s a fucking liar.”