Page 61 of Shattering

"And yet, she got it wrong."

Gray winced, running his hands down his face. "I know that now. I know I was a feckin' eejit. I should have come to ya first. I should have asked."

His voice broke slightly, but he pushed on.

"But Cadi, I've always struggled with trust. I didn't even trust my own ma."

Cadi's brow furrowed, but she stayed silent.

Gray laughed bitterly. "I never realized how much I was waitin' for the other shoe to drop. I had this—this fear, deep in my gut, that it was only a matter of time before everythin' I had came crashin' down. Everybody leaves."

He swallowed hard, looking down at his hands.

"I thought it had happened. That I was right all along, that ya had been keepin' this massive secret from me."

Cadi's hands tightened into fists, but then she sighed, loosening them. "Gray, I made mistakes too. I should have told you sooner. I should have pushed harder. But I did try."

He frowned slightly. "What do you mean?"

She exhaled. "I tried talking to you about Callum before, more than once. Do you remember last year when I mentioned meeting up with Callum and you suddenly remembered a last-minute meeting? Or when I brought him up again, and you got irritated, saying you didn't see what was so special about him?"

Gray opened his mouth, but no words came out.

A memory surfaced—Cadi sitting beside him on the sofa, her fingers tracing the edge of her tea mug, her hand on her pregnant belly as she carefully broached the subject of Callum's past. Gray, exhausted after a long shift, had cut her off, saying, "Not now, Cadi. I don't have time for whatever drama he's got going on."

Another time, in the car, when she had gently insisted that Callum had something important to say, he had gotten defensive. "What's so feckin' great about Callum, huh? Why d'ya always want to talk about him?" Then, without waiting for an answer, he had stormed off, leaving her sitting there.

Cadi saw the exact moment Gray remembered. Saw how his face shifted, his expression torn between guilt and realization.

"I felt uneasy about him, somehow. Even before Regan said anything, I felt you spent too much time together. And I—I shut ya down," he admitted, voice hoarse. "I didn't listen. And I got angry."

Cadi nodded. "You did. And I let it go because, at the time, your mother was so unwell, and you were barely holding on. I didn't want to burden you."

Gray exhaled sharply and shook his head. "No, Cadi. This is partly my fault too. You didn't tell me because I never told you about my past. A past I wanted to pretend didn't exist. If you had known... you would never have kept Callum's secret."

Cadi blinked, caught off guard. "Gray—"

"I love you so much, Cadi," he interrupted, his voice raw. "But I couldn't trust you with something that has shaped my entire life. I was so ashamed of where I came from. And that's on me."

Cadi looked down, her throat tight. "I should've found another way. I should have insisted. But I didn't want to push you further away."

Silence stretched between them, thick with realization.

Gray's voice was quieter now. "I ruined everythin'. I feckin' destroyed us."

Cadi took a breath, then finally turned back to face him.

Before she could reply, the doorbell rang.

Chapter 30

The bell rang, an unwelcome interruption slicing through the middle of their conversation.

Cadi barely managed to suppress a groan. They had just started—only scratched the surface of everything that needed to be said—and now this.

Gray stiffened beside her, tension rippling through his frame. He didn't even glance toward the door, his breathing uneven.

Cadi turned to him, taking in the tight set of his jaw, the way his hands curled into fists at his sides. He was in no shape to face anyone.