Page 48 of Hard to Pretend

And it would be Luce and River. Luce would try to convince River to let them go up early, just so she could take a peek into the kitchen and probably try to take over the food prep. Which…

“I thought there was going to be food.”

I didn’t smell anything cooking, and no one had gone into the kitchen since we arrived. Maybe they were still planning on ordering pizza.

“Luce made me do it,” Seb burst out.

“Made you do what?”

“Give her Jonas’s number.”

I looked over at Jonas who was grinning. “She volunteered to cook, which trust me, you want her to cook. We were just going to stick some frozen wings in the oven or order a spread from Pie in the Sky. Pizza, wings, the whole nine yards.”

I sighed heavily. Of course Luce found a way to take over the food preparation. “How did Lucemakeyou give her his number?”

“She asked nicely.”

I groaned. That was hardly making anyone do anything. We continued to make small talk while Jonas flittered around the apartment, straightening up things that didn’t need it. He only stopped when Silas finally pulled him onto the couch and threatened to sit on him. Matt, Eli, and Holden all showed up by 6:35 and a few minutes later, Luce and River came in holding trays of food. By 7:00, all our friends were there and introductions had been made.

We all settled around, and a movie was put on: a classic that everyone had already seen so no one minded when we all started chatting.

I felt amazing, watching a cheesy old movie, surrounded by my closest friends and a whole group of new friends, with Seb curled up against me.

This was what happiness felt like. This was what was missing on all the blind dates my friends had set me up on.

19

Thecallcametwodays after movie night with Chris and his friends.

Enterprise Marketing’s human resources representative performed a quick phone interview, never once asking about my relationship with Jasper. Which was probably a good thing, because I didn’t have a relationship with him. It also soothed my worries. I hadn’t only gotten the call because someone in their company had vouched for me. I’d gotten it off the strength of my resume. I got the in-person interview off the strength of my phone interview and the small portfolio I’d sent over, examples for fictional companies that I’d built both during and after college.

I’d been worried that the lack of any real life examples would work against me, that they’d insist that I start at the bottom of the ladder and I’d spend another few years in data entry hell.

Those worries were further soothed when I interviewed at Enterprise Friday morning. I’d restrained myself during our usual Thursday night get together. I’d only had two drinks, and I’d left The Rusty Nail earlier than I usually did. My friends each wished me luck as I left. Before I went into the building, I heard my phone chime with text message notifications. The group chat flooded with messages, all of my friends sending me a last surge of well wishes. Chris sent me a picture with a kiss and a message telling me that he’d wish me luck, but he knew that I didn’t need it.

I felt strong and confident when I walked into the building.

The confidence carried me through the interview. I felt amazing about everything. I’d answered their questions well, but more importantly, the answers they gave me about their company fit what I was looking for. They had a schedule laid out on what to expect for my first six months in the company. I’d be paired off with an experienced account manager for the first ninety days. During that time, they’d train me and by the end of that first ninety days, I would already have the experience working under them and handling my first account. After that, they’d take on a mentor role, checking over the work that I was doing without stepping in unless I was going in entirely the wrong direction.

By the time the six months ended, I’d have multiple clients of my own.

They went over the compensation schedule, and the pay was considerably more than I was making at Magnolia. They went over potential growth opportunities and how I could grow within the company, how I could climb their corporate ladder. They listed out realistic time frames for promotions and raises. I appreciated their transparency and all but jumped at the opportunity to schedule my second interview.

There was a skip to my step as I went back to my car. My fingers were tapping happy rhythms against the steering wheel as I left the parking lot. I didn’t stop to think as I drove away from the building. I had intended to go home, but somehow, the road led me to the only place I wanted to go: Chris’s apartment.

When I pulled into the parking lot, I sent a text message to him, letting him know that I would be there when he got off work. I got a response back less than a minute later. He was on the way. My eyes drifted toward the time on my dashboard clock. It was an hour earlier than he usually got off work. Was he leaving early to be with me or had he scheduled the time off in advance? Or maybe I was reading something into it that wasn’t there, and it was entirely unrelated to me.

That was always a possibility.

I got out of my car and locked it. I didn’t want to sit and wait. I was bursting with energy—nervous and excited—from the interview and sitting still felt like being imprisoned. I paced the sidewalk in front of his building, texting the group chat with updates from the interview. My friends had a lot of questions, and I was happy to answer all of them. At least until Chris got there, because that was who I wanted to see more than anything, who I wanted to celebrate this little victory with.

He pulled up fifteen minutes later. I watched, smiling so hard that my cheeks hurt, as he climbed out of his car. He greeted me with a hug and a deep kiss, and my heart raced in my chest. Realization struck me like lightning. My entire life, I only ever wanted to celebrate with my best friends. It meant something that now, my first thought had been to celebrate this milestone with someone else. It had been the man I’d met at a club almost a year ago and lost track of. It had been with the guy from the coffee shop who proposed an idiotic plan, but who I’d gotten to know and respect and care for.

Someone that I was falling deeper for by the minute.

That was the realization.

I was falling for him. I was getting exactly what I wanted. I’d wanted to find someone that felt likemyperson, and I had. It hadn’t been the way that I’d expected. I’d thought it would be through something intentional. Maybe I’d meet him on that dating appSilas and Jonas had helped develop when they met, or maybe I’d be one of the few people who found something real on Swyper. I thought it would require searching, but instead, it had found me.

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