Page 32 of Hard to Pretend

I wanted to know what I had to say or do to earn that smile.

I was still scrolling when I heard the pounding on my door. I put my phone in my pocket and made my way through my apartment, stepping over a pile of dirty clothes that had migrated from their usualcorner. The knocking got louder the longer it took me to answer.

I had no idea who wanted or needed to see methatbadly.

I didn’t even know who I knew that wouldn’t text before they came over. My friends weren’t the type of people who showed up without notice. My brother might, but he wouldn’t try to break down my door.

I hadn’t even considered Seb.

I didn’t think it could be him until I opened the door and found him standing there with a weird look on his face. He looked scared.

My stomach sank. “Seb?”

“I like you.”

The words escaped his mouth in a jumbled rush like they were some kind of confession. I looked at him for a moment and then motioned him to come in. Once I closed the door, I gave him a moment to go on. He didn’t. “I’m confused.”

“Ilikeyou,” he repeated, the words coming out a little slower.

I thought that was a pre-established fact. We’d gone on a real date, not one that was put on for the benefit of my friends or his mother. We’d spent the night together, and then we’d spent the entire day with one another. I had lied to my friends about it being fake, because I wanted it to be real.

But he was biting his lower lip like he was nervous, like he’d just made some earth shatteringannouncement and I should be shocked. Maybe even horrified that an amazing guy liked me. He kept staring at me like he was waiting for something.

Did he not know? Had it not been obvious when I asked him on a real date that I had feelings for him?

Shit.

“Seb,” I breathed out, shaking my head.

His face turned bright red, and his hand caught the doorknob. “It’s okay. It’s—Forget it.”

I realized my mistake the moment he turned around. Luckily, I was still close enough to him to catch him. I caught him and pushed him against the wall, slamming my mouth onto his. He froze for a moment, and then his lips started to respond. His tongue punched into mine, and I pulled away panting.

“What—”

“I like you too,” I cut him off. “I thought that was fucking obvious.” He stared at me as if my confession was in a language he didn’t understand. “How did you not know that? I asked you on a date. I spent all day with you. There aren’t a lot of people I want to spend that much time with, especially not guys that I’m just sleeping with. I couldn’t tell my friends that it was fake, because Iwantedit to be real.”

He cut me off with another kiss. It wasn’t as heated as the last one. It was as sweet as chocolate and warmed me like sunshine directly on my skin. When he pulled away, his forehead rested against mine and there wasthe hint of a smile on his lips. “Then let’s make it real. Officially,” he said, his breath a whisper against my lips.

“You mean that?”

“I mean that.” He pulled away and met my eyes. I’d never seen his face look as serious as it did in that moment. The fear in his eyes was completely gone, replaced by something warmer. Something I’d seen in those pictures I’d been looking at since I got home. It was a warmth and a comfort that I loved seeing there. “Christopher Whatever-Your-Middle-Name-Is Singh, will you do me the insane honor of being my boyfriend?”

“That is a very fancy way of asking me a question you already know the answer to,” I teased him. And just in case it wasn’t obvious to him, I nodded. “Yes, Seb. I’ll be your boyfriend.”

As if there was any other answer that I could give him. In the time we’d been faking our relationship, I’d gotten to know him. I’d gotten to know him, and I’d started to fall for him. How could I not?

He kissed me.

This kiss was hungry, lips bruising lips and his tongue slipping past the seam of my lips immediately. There was urgency to the kiss, but there was also an underlying sweetness that lingered on my lips. I smiled into the kiss, my arms wrapping around his waist and pulling him closer. I could feel his body responding already. Mine was too.

How could it not when my amazingboyfriendwas pressing his body against me and kissing me like he was a starving man and I was a porterhouse? It was one of the hottest kisses of my life, and I was ready to rip his clothing off of his body.

Which… why shouldn’t I?

I tugged his shirt over his head. His arms lifted, and his shirt hit the floor moments later. It was followed closely by mine. Our lips crashed together again, like we couldn’t stand to not be kissing for a single second. I didn’t know how long we kissed before he pulled away. My eyes met his for a moment. His dark eyes were almost black; his pupils were that dilated with lust. His lips were swollen and shiny with saliva.

They felt like magnets, pulling me back to them.

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