Page 10 of Close Protection

‘To be fair, Uncle Jonathan was probably saying the same thing.’ I shrug, laughing lightly.

‘I’m truly sorry you had to miss it, darling. But, hey, if it makes you feel better, I can buy one of those labour simulators and we can try it out on me and Henry to see who can last the longest?’

‘Oh my goodness, YES. Buy immediately.’

We both laugh, and I think it’s the first time I’ve seen my father relax in weeks. But it’s short-lived, as after amoment, his shoulders sag again and his face turns serious and a little sombre.

‘Daphne, honey. I’m sorry to ask…’ He pauses, evading my eyes. I wait for him to finish the question, tension crawling up my spine.

What now?

‘I was wondering if you’ve seen a necklace anywhere around the house?’

‘I have a lot of necklaces, Daddy. I need you to be a bit more specific,’ I prompt, knowing full well which necklace he’s referring to.

‘Of course, of course,’ he says, slowly becoming flustered. ‘It’s a gold necklace with a locket.’

‘Are you talking about Mother’s old locket?’ As the word ‘Mother’ comes out of my mouth, he flinches slightly.

‘Yes,’ he replies meekly. ‘That’s the one.’

‘Why? Is it lost? I didn’t realize it was valuable to you,’ I say curtly.

We never really talk about my mother any more, but not for lack of trying on my part. I had just turned nine when my father came into my room, sat on my bed, and emotionlessly relayed the news that my mother had drowned in the lake near the house. At that age, I understood the concept of death but I didn’t really grasp its consequences. It took me months to accept the fact mymother hadn’t just gone on a long work trip, she had left us for ever.

After that conversation, every time I brought her up Daddy would deliberately change the subject. Rather than helping us both confront our grief, my father pushed me into even more extracurricular hobbies and ensured I had extra swimming lessons, so I wouldn’t fear the water. I know everyone deals with grief in a different way but it hurts to only have Amelia to talk about her with. And I can’t even do that well because Amelia had only known my mother for a short while before she died. In an attempt to keep her memory alive, I’ve taken things of hers over the years: clothing, jewellery, photographs, which would explain the drawer. I wish I could talk freely about her to my father, but every time I try, he shuts me down. And every time he shuts me down, my resentment grows.

‘It is,’ he says, sensing my rising frustration. ‘Lost, I mean. I think.’

‘Oh, well that’s an awful shame.’

‘Uh, y-yes. Yes, it is.’ He shuffles in his seat, avoiding eye contact.

‘And when exactly did you realize it was lost?’

‘Um, w-well,’ my father stutters, at a loss for excuses. ‘You know, about two weeks ago.’ He finally looks intomy eyes. ‘Around the time you got back from school.’ Now I know he’s lying.

When I was eleven, I was messing around in my father’s study while he was with the personal trainer in the basement. I was opening and closing all the drawers in his desk when I noticed that one drawer moved differently to the others, and had a much darker bottom.

I took all the contents out, opening it up fully to reveal a fake bottom hiding a bunch of documents and a small velvet box. Opening the box I saw my mother’s gold locket. Days, evenings, workouts, weddings, my mother would always be wearing that necklace. It unlocked a memory of her that I had long forgotten. I placed the necklace in my pocket, carefully returning everything else to how I found it, and I’ve kept it ever since.

‘Daddy, stop lying. It’s been missing for years, so why do you need it now, huh? Why the sudden interest in Mother’s belongings? Before this you couldn’t seem to run fast enough any time I so much as mentioned her, let alone asked to see her things.’

‘You have it? You have the necklace?’ He looks at me with a weird mixture of panic and relief. Completely ignoring everything I just said, of course.

‘Nope.’

‘Daphne, come on. Be reasonable. Just give me thenecklace,’ he says, his temper rising.

I can’t help but laugh. ‘So, let me get this straight. You can’t share memories of my mother with me, or even talk about her, but it’s fine for you to come into my room and demand I give you something of hers, something thatI don’t have,’ I enunciate, ‘when you clearly couldn’t care less about it for the last six years?’

‘You did take her necklace, Daphne. That’s obviously how you know so much about it.’

‘You’re right. I took it.’ I shrug. ‘But I lost it two years ago.’

‘What? You lost it?’ His eyes widen in horror as his volume increases.

‘Those are indeed the words that came out of my mouth, yes.’

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