Page 166 of Bane of the Wild Hunt

Her hair was braided in one of the simpler styles that Ktínos females preferred, and she was wearing an apron over a plain cotton dress to try and blend in better.

But she was not fooling anyone.

Even with strands of hair curling around her face from the heat of the soup and dirt smudged on her cheeks, Amiraexudedkindness. And it was so beautiful in a way that I had never encountered before. I’d seen her in fine silks and jewels with her hair elaborately styled. I had seen her in fighting leathers facing down a troll without any fear as she prepared to defend us.

Butthiswas the most beautiful that I had ever seen her. The smile she gave a child who had likely lost his missing hand as a punishment for stealing was truly breathtaking. Her genuine laughter when a lonely, old man made a silly joke was endearing. And the gentle squeeze she gave the hand of a gaunt, young mother with a small babe strapped to her chest was heart wrenching.

I had known what Riordan saw in her for some time, but this was the first time that I had allowed myself to feel it too. To reallyseeher.

But acknowledging her worthiness of him also meant confronting the same truth that had held me back from Riordan for so long. The undeniable fact that I was not worthy of even asecondof either of their time.

Only I was desperate enough for the peace she seemed to have cultivated for herself that Ineededto know if she would grant me some of her attention nonetheless.

So I finally managed to push through all the reasons not to and began to stride toward her.

Only for someone to fall into step beside me.

“And just where do you think you are going, hmm?” demanded Sofia who was dressed similarly to Amira in a plain dress and apron.

“I need to speak with her,” I explained quickly.

“Well, as you can see, she is busy now, but I can make you an appointment next week—”

I stopped and turned to Amira’s handmaid, but she was not intimidated by my abrupt, aggressive movements and squared up with me without hesitation. I should not have been surprised by it. I knew her feelings toward me had always been unfriendly but now skewed in the direction of outright dislike after the night of the coronation when I made Amira cry. So I did not blame her for not trusting me with her mistress. Honestly, I respected her for it.

“How do you know it is not time sensitive?” I asked, forcing calmness and logic into my voice even when my ego demanded to be compensated for her defiance.

“If it were, then you would not have stood there staring at her for the better part of five minutes,” she quipped.

My mouth dropped open in shock that she would call me out so mercilessly.

“There are a dozen volunteers. I only need a—”

“A dozen volunteers, yes, but do you see the enormous line of people? They have come forher,” Sofia stressed. “They have all waited for hours. So, if you want to see her so badly right now, then get in line. Unlike all of them, you can see her at another time,” she reminded me.

Fuck. She had a point.

I hesitated, wavering with indecision as I debated on whether I could stomach waiting in the place that I hated so much among the people I had strove to put behind me. Like Sofia had pointed out, I could easily go back to my room and continue pacing or go find Riordan to distract me with some work until Amira was done.

But she was so close now that I could almost smell her sweet and soothing scent already. And although I wanted to be with Riordan when he debriefed his most trusted advisors on the situation with the Fuath later that evening, until then, he was preoccupied with paperwork.

Ihatedpaperwork, but I also knew it would not hold my interest enough to stem this tide of self-loathing.

“Fine,” I growled, and I marched away to the end of the line without knowing whether I would actually wait. But by the time I got there, I knew I could not go.

So I waited, and I let everyone go ahead of me so that I was the last one standing before her when the sun was about to go down over the city. Ares had approached me a couple times to make sure everything was alright, but I sent him away without explanation.

“Orion,” Amira blurted my name in surprise when she looked up and saw me waiting. Then she looked around us in concern. “Is everything alright?”

“Everything is fine, I just came to…”

Fuck, I’d had all afternoon to think on what the hell I would say to her, but I had been so focused on getting to the front of the line that I hadn’t even considered it.

“You came to…” she prompted when I failed to finish my sentence.

Helena had moved to stand nearer to the witch when I approached her, and I saw her cross her arms in the corner of my eye. Taking a stern stance that let me know that she would not tolerate any untoward behaviour. My mentor had always defended me, and she probably always would, but I knew this time she was truly disappointed in me for my behaviour the day before.

“I need to talk to you,” I insisted to Amira.

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